Tag: snowpocalypse

Delirious DC Weather Reporter Just Wants His ’15 Inches of Fun’

It was so cold out on the National Mall last night, we saw a squirrel chewing off his nuts to warm his mouth with the spray of blood. Hey-o. Here is a video clip: View more news videos at: http://www.nbcwashington.com/video.

Evil White Substance Invades East Coast But Spares D.C. Cute Panic

Around this time last year, an HISTORIC EVENT that could "only" be described by the adorable moniker "SNOWPOCALYPSE" destroyed our nation's capital, forever. Yesterday, a similar event occured in the Northeast, where such a thing is known as a...

Snowpocalypse Now

By the Comics CurmudgeonOH GOD YOU GUYS HAVE YOU LOOKED OUTSIDE LATELY! There is, like, so much snow! Frozen water! Falling out of the sky! And accumulating, on the ground! YOU GUYS! And...

One Of Jim Inhofe’s Malevolent Snowmen Wishes Global Warming Were Not A Scam But It Just Is

Here's is a letter that was stuck to the side of the mailbag yesterday and has remained tragically unread, until now. It is signed "A Concerned Citizen" and its seriousness literally cannot be overstated. from: @verizon.net to: tips@wonkette.com date: Wed, Feb 10,...

Bo Obama Is Just Cold Humping the Snow

While you were being gnawed to death by Ice Rats, the White House socialist Bo Obama Kennedy was just fooling around in the snow. Next week he'll be on the cover of The Sports Illustrated with his snowy ass...

Snowstorm, Devil-Umbrella Murder Major Garrett

Fox News' failure of a URL-shortener, Major Garrett, died in the snow today, maybe.