Like our brave American heroes at Central Command in Florida who remotely bomb Afghan villages using military-grade PS2s, Dick Cheney is simply standing in the bushes so you don’t see the remote control he uses to make Bush lie. MORE »

Still creeped out by today’s video of Dick Cheney’s “Twin Peaks” routine in the Rose Garden? Get ready for more inexplicable terror.

We combed through our Creepy Cheney Image Database Archives (TM) and found startling evidence that the dude is basically in the bushes all the time — or, perhaps more frightening, has perfected the ability to materialize in the bushes at opportune times to terrorize the press corps or other administration officials.

There is another, more horrific explanation, which we’ll explain after the jump. Plus, lots more pictures!

MORE »