Tag Archives: shoplifting

  Shoplifts Shoots And Leaves

Boise Burglary Suspect Is One Sad Panda

Photo courtesy Hundred Acre Wood P.D.
Sometimes you just need to get out the ol’ rainbow-puking gnome, and today is one of those days, because today, Tuesday, December Second, in the Year of Our Lord Two Thousand Fourteen, we learned that an 18-year-old woman was arrested for shoplifting by Boise Police late last night, and her name, we shit you not, is Amanda Miranda Panda. Read more on Boise Burglary Suspect Is One Sad Panda…
  do you know who he is?

Let’s All Listen To Texas Lt. Governor David Dewhurst Calling Police To Get Niece Out Of Pokey

Texas Lt. Gov. David Dewhurst is a man who cares about justice. He’s a big fan of gittin’ tough on crime, and a strong supporter of the death penalty, of course, because he’s a Texas Republican. But he’s also not without compassion for those who have been unjustly accused, especially if they are related to him. Which is why Dewhurst called the Allen Police Department to ask what could be done to get Ellen Bevers, his “step-niece-in-law,” out of jail after an August 3 arrest for shoplifting. It doesn’t appear he did anything improper or illegal — Allen police emphasized it’s not unusual for relatives to call for information, and Dewhurst told the sergeant he talked to that they should follow their normal procedures. Wonkette is very clear on this — even lieutenant governors are allowed to call to help their relatives, and sure, it’s entirely possible that this was a scanning error, not shoplifting. (Due process, y’all!) Oh, but that tone of voice. Dewhurst identifies himself several times as “David Dewhurst, Lieutenant Governor of the State of Texas,” and anyone who’s worked for that one boss will recognize the Alpha Male Voice of Authority coming through the phone. Give it a listen over here (fair warning: There be autoplay video at that link) Read more on Let’s All Listen To Texas Lt. Governor David Dewhurst Calling Police To Get Niece Out Of Pokey…
  Are there no workhouses?

Here Is Your Heartwarming 2012 ‘Throw A Poor Family Out In The Snow’ Christmas Miracle, America!

Just in case you were feeling hopeful about humanity or anything, we thought we’d nip that right in the bud. Yep, it looks like the Iconic Christmas Story for 2012 has arrived! In Grand Junction, Colorado, a single mother and her three children are going to be evicted from their apartment just in time for Christmas, because the woman’s son shoplifted a pair of shoes, and the apartment complex’s “zero tolerance” lease agreement states that “any criminal activity on or near the premises is grounds for immediate eviction.” Read more on Here Is Your Heartwarming 2012 ‘Throw A Poor Family Out In The Snow’ Christmas Miracle, America!…
 

Your Search — “ask the white house” libby — Did Not Match Any Documents

It’s still up over at the White House site, in case you’re curious. As Hotline points out, this little chat happened “over a month after Allen reported to CoS Andy Card that he had been cited for theft following a ‘misunderstanding’ at a Montgomery Co. Target and 8 days after he publicly announced he wanted to, um, ‘spend more time with his family.'” Read more on Your Search — “ask the white house” libby — Did Not Match Any Documents…
 

New Defense: A Hot Dog Made Floyd Lose Control

Josh Marshall, who apparently has “researchers”(ha!), found Claude Allen’s yearbook. And yes, as you may have heard if you listen to NPR (or have read the Times today), Claude Allen has an evil twin: Read more on New Defense: A Hot Dog Made Floyd Lose Control…