Tag: sheldon adelson

Guess Donald Trump Thinks Chicago Cubs Can Eff Right Off

To be fair, maybe the only reason Trump has failed to congratulate the Cubs is that he's classless trash.

Wonkagenda: September 28th, 2016

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This Way To The Primaries, Ladies And Gentlemen

Trump, Walker OK With Huckabee Calling Obama Hitler, Wish They’d Said It First

We have now entered Phase Three of the Mike Huckabee Uses A Shitty Holocaust Analogy story. Phase One was when he said the dumb thing about how Obama's nuclear deal with Iran will "take the Israelis and march them...
Him?

George W. Bush Emerges From Spider Hole To Trash-Talk Obama’s Middle East Strategy. Really.

Ever since leaving the White House, the worst president in America's history has mostly kept his stumbling idiot wordhole shut, because he is a man of integrity, and he would never stoop so low as to criticize President Obama, as he...
Ayyyyyyyy, this guy!

Scott Walker Refuses To Provide Transcripts Of Conversations With Nonexistent God

And so it came to pass that the Freedom From Religion Foundation (FFRF) submitted a lulzy public records request to the office of Christianist Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker. What, FFRF asked, was the substance of the Governor's conversations with...
"Hey, what's so funny?" -conservative donors

Scammy Conservative PACs Fleece Your Grandma With This One Weird Trick

Last week, Mother Jones reported that Mike Huckabee used his PAC to funnel more than $400,000 to his family. This week, Politico's Ken Vogel gives us a story about scammy conservative PACs that make thousands of dollars from home with just one weird...
Good evening, Des Moines!

Scott Walker Addresses People Of Iowa? New Hampshire? Wait. Wisconsin? Yeah, Wisconsin

It’s a new year, which means government executives all over the country are in the midst of self-congratulatory presentations of cherry-picked accomplishments and passive-aggressively reading lists of future demands. It’s mostly trite and zzzzzzzz but some of them are...
And then the kids spin the grenadel

Scott Walker Wished Jewish Friends A Merry Jewish Christmas And An Incendiary New Year

Wisconsin Gov. Scott Walker is definitely giving some serious thought to running for president -- like, more serious thought than Donald Trump, even -- and to do that, he's going to have to prove that he is a...
Florida: This could be us but you playin'.

Reagan Drug Czar Says Weed Won’t Make You Gay Anymore But Will Still Kill You

On Tuesday, Floridians have an important decision to make at the polls. No, not whether they prefer Medicare fraudster Rick “Bat Boy” Scott or walking bottle of bronzer Charlie Crist as their next governor. We’re thinking of a much...

Sunday Bloody NYT Sunday: Special Binge-Watching With MoDo Edition

Today's Sunday Times is still full of basketball sportsball, with stories on both of those games. SPOILER ALERT: your bracket still sucks. SECOND SPOILER ALERT: the NCAA sucks and is nothing but an elaborate way to make money off...

Watch Jon Stewart’s Epic Rant Against SCOTUS’s Campaign Money Decision (Video)

Jon Stewart is pretty good at distilling the absurdity of certain political events into a just few words. Granted, a lot of them need to be bleeped, but with this week's Supreme Court decision tossing out aggregate limits on...

Republican Goyim Go To Vegas To Dance Hora For Jew Dollars, Hilarity Ensues Oy

In case you missed it because you were taking your bubbe to shul, Republicans gathered in Las Vegas on Saturday to beg Republican Jews -- all two and a half of them -- to give them Jew dollars for...

Michele Bachmann Bravely Stands Up For Oppressed Straight People Everywhere

Michele Bachmann leads a rough life. Despite being a Congresswoman, former presidential front-runner, and a national spokesperson for Crazy Eye Syndrome, she has a problem. As a straight person, she is tired of being bullied by the gays all...

Gingrich Sugar-Daddy Took Our Manhood, Say Peons

If there is one thing you will learn from the workplace accident documentary Extract, it is that losing one ball is the sweet spot in any work-injury claim. Lose both, and the jury can't identify with you, as they...

Trusty Surrogate John McCain Talks About All That ‘Foreign Money’ Funding Romney Campaign

His lordship St. John McCain is all over the place this week, yelling about popcorn and pigs, on Twitter, demanding leak investigations, whining about how Obama never called him, and, well, how about a little rant about campaign finance...

Newt’s Nutty Super PAC Billionaire Casually Tosses In Another $10M

Looks like there's some big action today at the few-billionaires-only private dog track more commonly known as the American political system: Nutty Vegas casino warhawk crook Sheldon Adelson -- not to be confused with the Santorum-backing "Why are we...