Tag Archives: sexism

  Big Swinging Brass Baseballs

New York Mets Allegedly Fire Lady Exec For Forming Babby Out Of Wedlock

I need no permission
A former executive for the New York Baseball Mets is suing Mets COO Jeff Wilpon for ALLEGEDLY firing her because she got preggers out of wedlock. Leigh Castergine was the head of the Mets’ ticket sales office, and she was doing the absolute best she could considering that the Mets play terrible baseball at a terrible park in a terrible part of Queens. Casterigne performed her duties while with child, and her lawsuit alleges that Wilpon harassed and humiliated her for failing to lasso herself a man before producing her bastard offspring. Newsday brings us this blockquote. Read more on New York Mets Allegedly Fire Lady Exec For Forming Babby Out Of Wedlock…
  #MadAboutAThing

Senator Ron Johnson To Little Lady Senator: Pics Or GTFO

Wisconsin’s Ron Johnson (R-Of course) has only been a member of the United States Senate for about five minutes (technically he was elected in 2010, which in Senate years is five minutes), but he sure knows a thing or three about how there has never been a single moment of less-than-perfect decorum. (He was not yet in the Senate when Vice President Dick Cheney told Sen. Patrick Leahy to quote unquote GO FUCK YOURSELF back in 2004, so that wouldn’t even count.) Read more on Senator Ron Johnson To Little Lady Senator: Pics Or GTFO…
  clipbait

Jon Stewart Astonished Old Senators Who Look Like Balls Could Be Sexists (Video)

He seems pleased with that graphic
Jon Stewart has found the real scandal in the story of the sexist comments aimed at Sen. Kirsten Gillibrand by unnamed male colleagues in the Senate. One warned her “Don’t get too porky,” while another grabbed her stomach and said “Don’t lose too much weight now, I like my girls chubby.” With no consensus on No Fat Chicks v. Chubby Chasers, Stewart says, Congress is pathetic: “Even when it comes to shitty sexism, the Senate is gridlocked. They can’t get anything done.” Read more on Jon Stewart Astonished Old Senators Who Look Like Balls Could Be Sexists (Video)…
  clipbait

Neil deGrasse Tyson Brings Science, Anti-Sexism Together Like Chocolate And Boobs

You fucking love science. And you hate sexism at the New York Times! Well, here is Neil deGrasse Tyson to bring the two together like chocolate and boobs. See, this lady “scientist” (hahahaha as if) was being interviewed by the New York Times, and they were all like, whyfore no husband you are lesbian? This was a very popular question in the 1890s 1990s and 2000s, when everybody was asking hilariously unqualified W. Supreme Court nominee Harriet Meyers the same thing (to be fair, Meyers did have a mullet once). Read more on Neil deGrasse Tyson Brings Science, Anti-Sexism Together Like Chocolate And Boobs…
  He-Man Woman Hater

Man Time: Sorry We Were Sexist at You Yesterday, Lady Sports!

Alert HNTP tipster Niki P. has reminded us July is not the dead zone of professional sports we claimed it was yesterday. Women play sports too, and seeing as it’s the 15th anniversary of Brandi Chastain scandalizing America by revealing her sports bra, we think it is appropriate to devote this session of Man Time to lady sports. SORRY WE WERE SEXIST AT YOU, LADY SPORTS. Read more on Man Time: Sorry We Were Sexist at You Yesterday, Lady Sports!…
  clipbait

Jon Stewart Has Feelings About Lady Politicians And Their Hysterical Emotions (Video)

Jon Stewart gets at the very important issue of sexism in politics with “breaking news from the inside of another human being” — that is, Chelsea Clinton’s Politically Meaningful Baby, the grandchild that could make all the difference for Hillary Clinton’s possible campaign, or be completely meaningless — except to Darrell Issa, who “has already subpoenaed the baby to testify about Benghazi.” Read more on Jon Stewart Has Feelings About Lady Politicians And Their Hysterical Emotions (Video)…
  an inconvenient woman

Exclusive: Sen. Jeff Sessions Mansplains The Budget To OMB Director, Covers It Up On YouTube

Exclusive Drudge Sirens Must Credit Wonkette: So here is Alabama Sen. Jeff Sessions mansplaining the President’s budget to the President’s Budget Director, OMB chief Sylvia Matthews Burwell. He is very very unhappy that the budget request includes an additional $56 billion over the compromise agreement passed back in December. Despite Sessions’s indignant tone, it’s not exactly a hidden spending request, considering that it’s discussed right there in the second paragraph of the Budget Overview webpage. But Sessions has to act like he has the Gotcha of the year, if only Burwell will admit that the Obama administration is trying to tax everyone to death, but darned if she’ll play his game. So in frustration, at about the 2:20 mark in the video above, Sessions smirks, “You look real innocent the way you look at me here, like you don’t know what I am talking about. Can’t you just simply answer the question, yes or no? Do you intend to spend more than Ryan-Murray, and will that not require an amending of the law to allow you to do so?” We have a hard time believing that Sessions would use such condescending language to Treasury Secretary Jack Lew or to former OMB Director Peter Orszag, but how dare a lady just waltz in and talk to a U.S. Senator as if she had any right to insist on nuance. Don’t play innocent, miss, just answer yes or no. And it’s not just Yr Wonkette that thinks the “You look real innocent” line was over the top — Sessions’s own office, eager to portray Burwell as evasive, put the exchange up on their YouTube channel, but completely edited out the “You look real innocent” remark. When did Jeff Sessions hire James O’Keefe? Read more on Exclusive: Sen. Jeff Sessions Mansplains The Budget To OMB Director, Covers It Up On YouTube…
  ugly vile little snark mob

Deleted Comments Of The Day, President’s Day Edition

Once more to the pending comments queue, dear Wonkers, and let’s just see what has piled up for you. We have this, from terribly upset person “Sundaymorningg,” in reply to that article we did when Michelle Malkin noticed that Michelle Obama wore a designer dress to the State Dinner for French President Francois Hollande. Sundaymorningg is not pleased with all the terrible racism and sexism all over Yr Wonket’s comments section: My goodness, this forum is just a study in liberal tolerance and love. You call women the C-word, bitches, whores and so on and pretend to be pro-woman. You make racist comments right and left and claim that conservatives are racist. Most of the comments read like a potty-mouthed version of Hukd on fonix. Thank you for verifying that liberals are the hateful, anti-woman, racist, nearly illiterate buffoons they accuse conservatives of being. Oh, we are such monsters here. We have already addressed the c-word, and while we recognize that not everyone agrees with Yr Editrix on that, she has had her Feminist Card revoked so many times by other people that she’s not too worried that a wingnut is now ready to revoke it again. Oddly, in the eleven (11!!!!1!) comments Sundaymorningg left, they said not a single thing about policies, but were very careful to police every instance of “bitch” or “cunt” in the comments, because obviously if you say an unkind thing about a particular woman, you are therefore precluded from wanting equal pay, reproductive freedom, health care, and all that nonsense. Read more on Deleted Comments Of The Day, President’s Day Edition…
  burn it down

Investigation Into Whether Racist Sexist Miami Dolphins Are The Worst Finds That Why Yes, They Are

Somehow, it’s hard to focus on sportsball’s magnificent athleticism when it seems like there are always stories about athletes doing murder — ALLEGEDLY — and raping women across America — ALLEGEDLY — and domestic violencing the ladies and all manner of breakin’ the law. All of that somehow gets a pass because SPORTSBALL, while Richard Sherman is called a thug for using his words to be all, like, “I am THE BEST at kicking ass and taking names,” which is not illegal or racist or sexist, but just, like, typical run-of-the-mill sportsball bragging, which, as I understand is, it kind of part of the whole culture. Read more on Investigation Into Whether Racist Sexist Miami Dolphins Are The Worst Finds That Why Yes, They Are…
  nasty vile little snark mob

Deleted Comments Of The Day: You Should Have Found A More Racist Picture For That Story On Immigrants

Time for another plunge into the ol’ comments queue, and the good news is that we just got a new shipment of industrial-strength rubber gloves! Our first missive comes from wannabe art director “rogerinorlando,” whose name and location we will not release. Rogerinorlando was not pleased by DDM’s choice of graphics for a recent story on Kelly Ayotte’s proposal to offset the cost of unemployment benefits by raising taxes on immigrant families, since so many of them are rolling around in giant pots of very little money. To be specific, rogerinorlando was displeased that we’d used Dorothea Lange’s “Migrant Mother” photo, because that woman was a migrant, not an immigrant: Poor choice of a photo, one which doesn’t match your subject or thesis. That iconic farm woman shot from the ’30s doesn’t have anything to do with this particular debate. An Okie, a sharecropper, a Dust Bowl survivor, I forget the exact context. But there are plenty of loaded images you could have chosen that would have made your case and added the element of race to it. This was lazy. Damn straight, rogerinorlando. We will correct that right away. Say, you do know, don’t you, that the original photo is just propaganda anyway, right? Read more on Deleted Comments Of The Day: You Should Have Found A More Racist Picture For That Story On Immigrants…
  stare case

Daily Caller Warns: Liberals Gonna Claw Out Men’s Eyes So They Can’t Stare At Boobies

Leering homunculus Patrick Howley saw a link to a social science abstract somewhere (no, Mr. Howley, do not try to convince us that’s from your casual reading) about this study that seems to confirm that, yes, Virginia, there is such a thing as an “objectifying gaze” — and decided, based on absolutely nothing in the abstract’s description of the study, that the obvious result of such research is that liberals are going to outlaw men looking at women below the neck, because that’s just how liberals do. But, but, but, he whines, he likes staring at boobies! And liberals want to ruin that, because they are addicted to regulating everything, including Patrick Howley’s wandering eyes: This is what the progressives exist to do. They take away our activities. If it’s an activity and it’s kind of fun or pleasurable, the progressives are going to take it away. That’s the very basis of their personality type. They’re the regulators. The hall monitors. We had never really thought of ogling mammalian protuberances as an “activity,” and we’re reasonably sure you can’t get a merit badge or certification in it. Then again, maybe Patrick Howley owns a “Bikini Inspector” badge that he feels he’s earned through years of study. Read more on Daily Caller Warns: Liberals Gonna Claw Out Men’s Eyes So They Can’t Stare At Boobies…
  quits everything but the yapping

Sarah Palin Calls Chris Christie Big Gross Fatty, For Sisterhood; Also, Pretty Suspicious Of This Commie New Pope

And it’s another day in the Sarah Palin Got A Book Out Y’all tour of network teevee. What can we learn from her dulcet tones and gentle murmurs today? First, would it shock you to learn that Sarah Palin said a Thing, and it was True, and Correct? No, we mean it. Might wanna take a seat on your sit-down place, because True Correct Thing What Fell Out of Sarah Palin’s Tattooed Lipliner Lips is comin’ atcha! “[Hillary Clinton] can expect that sexism, but you overcome it. You ignore it. You thicken your skin, you march forward with your agenda, your priorities, what you think is right,” said Palin. “Hillary Clinton was mistreated when it came to appearances, when it came to wardrobe – petty, superficial things that the men don’t ever seem to hear much about, but a woman candidate will,” she said. Well shut your mouth, Sarah Palin! No, really, shut your mouth. But yes, that thing is Correct, and it is True, and Hillary Clinton does in fact have cankles so she should be invisible and die please. And also, sometimes we focus more on Sarah Palin’s boob job and on her hilarious wig than on what is going on underneath it, because we are sometimes guilty of a cheap shot or two ourselves, but also her boobs and wig are hilarious. Then she called Chris Christie a big gross fatty. Read more on Sarah Palin Calls Chris Christie Big Gross Fatty, For Sisterhood; Also, Pretty Suspicious Of This Commie New Pope…
  keep f... frying that chicken

Hilarious Buttons At California Republican Convention Highlight Hillary Clinton’s Fatal Unsexiness

HuffPo reports that these buttons were for sale at a “VIP reception area” at a California Republican Party convention this weekend. The San Francisco Chronicle’s Carla Marinucci tweeted the photo and noted that the display had been removed at a later point. Read more on Hilarious Buttons At California Republican Convention Highlight Hillary Clinton’s Fatal Unsexiness…
  hush now ladies

‘Hush That Pretty Lyin’ Mouth Of Yours,’ Hero Congressman Tells Dumb Old Journalist Lady

Yet another brave GOP congressman who voted to stop paying all the nonessential “little people” — Congress is, of course, “essential” — went on the teevee to splain himself, and boy, did he ever! Blah blah blah, said he, it would send the wrong message to not grift up every last taxpayer dollar while fighting to keep any other American from ever enjoying the fruits of society. That’s expected, of course, but Rep. Todd Rokita, of Indiana, must have been feeling like his other poo-brained colleagues were getting a little too much love and attention, and added an extra special dollop of whipped cream and Courvoisier onto the end: Read more on ‘Hush That Pretty Lyin’ Mouth Of Yours,’ Hero Congressman Tells Dumb Old Journalist Lady…
  Won't someone please think of the men even more?

Men’s Rights Activists Invite Men To ‘Stand Their Ground’ Against Uppity Women, What Could Possibly Be Wrong With That?

You know how men are the real victims of domestic violence and rape and sexism and discrimination and everything else? Hey, stop laughing, it’s true! It says so on some websites created by men for men. It is a FACT that since creation, women have ruled everything and forced the weaker sex — men, obviously — to live under the oppressive thumb of the matriarchy, subject to all manner of violence and sometimes commercials on television that make men look like morons and/or potential rapists. It is awful. It is the worst. But finally, finally, there is something men can do to stand up against the misandry and fight back. They can stand their ground. No, not the kind where you hunt down a black kid in a hoodie and kill him dead because his candy looks threatening. The kind where you add your name to a letter, which is like shooting someone but WITH WORDS. For all of you bitter divorced dads out there who can’t believe you have to pay child support because the goddamned feminists and also you heard about a guy whose wife slapped him once, there is finally a safe space for you. Read more on Men’s Rights Activists Invite Men To ‘Stand Their Ground’ Against Uppity Women, What Could Possibly Be Wrong With That?…
  dems in disarray

Selfish Jerk Debbie Wasserman Schultz Has Personal Ambitions, Thinks She’s A Man

Bitches, man. Always thinking of themselves, always putting their own ambitions first. Don’t you just hate that? Don’t you just despise the way women are always ruthlessly promoting their own careers, never thinking of others, never giving of themselves, never — Oh fuck it, we can’t even finish that fake sentence. Let’s just get to the vomit-inducing pile o’ zebra shit du jour: Debbie Wasserman Schultz spent 18 months slogging through 885 events in 31 states to boost President Barack Obama’s chances for reelection. Now, she is planning to employ the nearly unrivaled Rolodex she’s built to turn it into political muscle in the Capitol — for herself. FOR HERSELF?!?! She’s going to use the political connections she’s made as chair of the Democratic National Committee to help advance her own career in politics — for the first time EVER, because no one in politics is ever looking to advance their careers or use their connections? (Also, sidenote: What up with “Rolodex,” Politico? Rolodex? Really? Not even a mid-last decade reference like “Hotmail address book”? Sheesh.) It’s unheard of. It’s so gauche. It’s simply not done, dahling. What next — she’s going to piss in the punch bowl at the next Democratic Party soiree? Obscenely ambition DWS (as she is known among those who find typing to be, like, so oppressive, man) doesn’t even have the decency to be shy about how she doesn’t even give a good goddamn about the rest of her party; she’s just in it for her. Of course, we’ve long known she is “not a lady,” but this is really beyond the pale. It’s not clear what Wasserman Schultz wants — she pointedly wouldn’t rule out running for leadership, governor or senator. Oh my gawd. She might want to run for higher office? Who does this uppity chick think she is? Barack Obama? No one has ever run for office and then refused to rule out running for even higher office? Unheard of! Unacceptable! Unpossible! Read more on Selfish Jerk Debbie Wasserman Schultz Has Personal Ambitions, Thinks She’s A Man…
  cool story hansel

London Mayor Kills The Malaysian Prime Minister (With ‘Jokes’)

Hey ladies! Are you looking to go to college, Lean In, and really get ahead in this world? Perhaps you are from a predominantly Muslim country and you are trying to break glass ceilings over there so we don’t have to break glass ceilings over here, something something mixed metaphors. Well, if you are one of those women in Malaysia who will make up 68% of the incoming college class, the Mayor of London is so glad that you are looking to the University system to find a suitable husband for yourself. Via Raw Story: The Mayor of London, Boris Johnson, has been accused of casual sexism after joking that the increase in the number of women attending university in Malaysia was down to their desire to find a husband. HAHAHA, its so funny and awesome to belittle women in foreign countries who may be seeking to make a better life for themselves. Because everyone knows that women only go to college to find husbands who can take care of them, amirite ladies! And who better for Mayor Johnson to say this to than the Malaysian Prime Minister, while also probably inviting him to derelicte … his balls. Let’s sexplore.  Read more on London Mayor Kills The Malaysian Prime Minister (With ‘Jokes’)…
  Cold Dead Hands

Hey NSA, If You’re Reading This Could You Maybe Do Something About All These Gun Horrors? (Updated)

Perhaps you’re aware of the Most Depressing Thing on the Internet, Slate’s running tally of every US gun death since Newtown, which at the time of this writing stood at 4,850 including the six who were killed in Santa Monica in Friday’s ordinary run-of-the mill mass murder spree by a kevlar-clad neo-berserker lunatic. Eleven people were killed that day in all; another, in Arizona, was shot by his four-year old son when the kid found an unsecured handgun in a friend’s home. Friday, June 7th was the worst day for American gun deaths since Wednesday, June 5th, when 17 people died after being shot, or shooting themselves, which was terrific compared to the day before, when 28 died in random and not-so-random acts of Freedom.* So now we are just waiting for the idiot bilge of “This proves gun control doesn’t work” and “It’s because of that Snoopy Poop Dog and the kids with their pinball games” and “False flag tyranny!” to come pouring in, and oh here “Santa Monica College was a gun-free zone DO YOU SEE THE PATTERN?” Thanks, Free Republic, knew we could count on y’all. How else is America blaming guns for all its problems today? Read more on Hey NSA, If You’re Reading This Could You Maybe Do Something About All These Gun Horrors? (Updated)…
  that tie would look even better on a naked chick amirite?

Forget How Sexist This New Florida Logo Is, Let’s Talk About What They Paid For It

Some yammering feminazis are opening their shrill faceholes — which would look so much prettier with some dicks in them, are we right fellas? — about waaaah Florida’s new business logo is sexist waaah. It’s a man in a tie! says one hairy-legged hippie. Women don’t wear ties! says another one, who’s probably a lesbo. Why does Florida assume that it’s only men who do business, says a third bra-burning harpie. The state of Florida is learning the hard way that $380,000 can buy a lot of controversy. That’s how much the state paid to come up with its first branding logo designed to attract new business — only to be met with accusations that the logo is sexist. NEEDLE-SCRATCH. The state of Florida paid how much for their stupid logo? Read more on Forget How Sexist This New Florida Logo Is, Let’s Talk About What They Paid For It…
  our hero

Barack Obama Will Punch Graham’s and McCain’s Lights Out Probably, He Is So Mad About Them Slagging Susan Rice

Earlier we brought you the BREAKING NEWS that Senator John McCain is a puckered old asshole, and also why he is full of poo. B. Barry Bamz responded to McCain’s typical slurring of UN Ambassador Susan Rice in his press conference today by going all HULK SMASH and practically challenging McCain and his partner in E-vil, Miss Lindsey Graham, to fisticuffs! Here is a thought problem for our Internet friends: Was it SEXISMS by Barack Obama to get all het up on Rice’s behalf? Like, we cannot imagine him being so ruffled and dandery and whatnot if it were, say, Simon Rice under attack? The answer, of course, is YES it is sexisms. But it is our Barry O, so it is okay? Read more on Barack Obama Will Punch Graham’s and McCain’s Lights Out Probably, He Is So Mad About Them Slagging Susan Rice…
  crazy for feeling so lonely

Nuts & Sluts: In Which Your Wonkette Agrees With Pat Robertson And Richard Cohen About Paula Broadwell

There is a lot of Yap and Huff on the Internet right about now about how poor Paula Broadwell is being SEXISMED because nobody is making tons of mocking fun of disgraced former top spook David Petraeus, but people are all OH HER CLOTHES WERE TOO TIGHT SLUT SLUT SLUT. They seem to be regarding the current Unpleasantness as just another in our unbroken epochs of Blame the Floozy. But is it possible that the reason we are not making fun of David Petraeus is because the US has, 20 years after Bill Clinton, become less puritanical about affairs, and the reason we are all making fun of Paula Broadwell has nothing to do with her flooziness but rather is because she is (allegedly) a psycho nutzoid Internet stalker who is one crowbar and a pack of Depends away from driving to Houston to kneecap a bitch? Like, we are sorry there is still sexism in the world, and the women are blamed for the affairs and stuff, but maybe that isn’t actually what is happening here! For instance! If she hadn’t gone bunny-boiler (allegedly) would anybody even have cared about the boffing — if it were even discovered at all? We posit not really! Also, some Internet stalkers really are crazy, even if they are women, and it is not not-feminist to say so! (We have one ourself. We would print all her messages to us, but then you would be scared, and probably cry.) And we think it hurts equality to insist that Broadwell is somehow a victim in this, and society is to blame. And that is where Richard Cohen and Pat Robertson come in. Read more on Nuts & Sluts: In Which Your Wonkette Agrees With Pat Robertson And Richard Cohen About Paula Broadwell…