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Tag: sex crimes

Gay Hatin’ Mayor Caught Playing Strip Poker With Underage Boys, Because Of Course He Was

Stockton Republican Mayor Anthony Silva accused of recording teen playing strip poker with him at the camp he worked at.

Settlement In Baltimore Sex-For-Repairs Suit Doesn’t Include Chance To Kick Defendants In Nuts

Sometimes we do Nice Time here at yr Wonkette when bad people get their just desserts and when good people finally prevail. Other times, we just can't get to Nice Time because the underlying bits are so awful that the...
Nope.

Baltimore Public Housing Maintenance Dudes Getting So Much Head, Bro

GRRRRR. So here is a new twist on "Fuck The Poors." How about ACTUALLY Fuck The Poors? Or at least force them to give you head, or other assorted sex favors, in exchange for maintenance work in public housing? Because...
Fun-employed

TLC Sends Duggars Away To Live On Farm With Honey Boo Boo’s Mom

Oh no, how will the Duggars survive? TLC has decided that, you know, on second thought, now that "kid-diddling" has replaced "look at that fun family with so many kids!" in the American consciousness, maybe it should cancel the show....
Hutchens was into little girls, but fuck it.

Surprise, Kiddie Porn Cop In Josh Duggar Story Into Some Nasty-Ass Kiddie Porn

Hey, remember how when Jim Bob Duggar found out that his son Josh was sex criming his daughters, he took Josh to a state trooper pal of his, Cpl. Joseph Hutchens, to get a "very stern talk" about how sex...
Dirty sex crimer or just a asshole?

Oh, Did Dumb Josh Duggar Do A Sex Crime When He Was 17, Just Like Jesus?

Well, well, well. WELL. Here is a story about Josh the oldest of 19 Kids & CountingTM Duggar that may or may not be true, who knows, but since the Duggars, including Josh, are fond of saying things that...
If this is a crime, then we're guilty!

Let’s All Have Sex On The Beach, And Then Go To Prison Forever!

Welcome to sunny Florida, NO FUCKING ALLOWED, at least not on the beach. Seems Florida Man has gone and gotten himself into trouble again, and he may do 15 years in the slammer, because he was so overcome by the romance...

2014: The Year All Rape Ended Forever Because It Never Existed Obviously

In the early days of 2014, the world was a simpler, happier place. Bill Cosby was still a kindly, grandfatherly funnyman and not a horrible monster rapist, and we all enjoyed playfully teasing him about his sweaters and Jell-O...

Pervy Convict Legislator Wants Virginia To Remove The Taint From His Seat

Competition is heating up for Wonkette's Legislative Shitmuffin of the Year award. Today's featured contender: Joseph Dee Morrissey, recently resigned member of the Virginia House of Delegates and "descendant of John Morrissey, a 19th-century U.S. Congressman and one-time bare-knuckle...

Surprise, Christian Radio Host In Jail For Trying To Buy Sex With Young Boys (Whatever, ‘Allegedly’)

It is almost getting to the point where you can't trust people who lead pious public Christian lives not to try to buy sex with young boys anymore! Authorities say John Balyo, 35, was arrested Friday morning at the...

Former Tennessee Pol Nabbed In High-Speed Fap-Fest

A former alderman and vice mayor from Mount Carmel, Tennessee, has been arrested on charges of indecent exposure after a female motorist said he "'fondled himself' and made obscene gestures while they drove beside each other on Interstate 26."...

Sheriff Joe’s Posse Would Like To Surprise Your Children With An Armed Sex Offender

Remember last month? Last month was fun, what with all the jibber-jabber about how armed guards in schools would keep all the children safesies. Marching at the very head of that parade of stupid was our old friend Sheriff...

ABC News Stops The Presses: Obama Has A Friend Who Did Sex To A Hooker

Sup, ABC News? Is there anything in the world you could possibly try to twist into a news story during a holiday news week? "Obama Golfing In Hawaii With Pal Arrested in Prostitution Sting"? Sure, that should do it....

Virginia Town Shuts Down Lady’s Spa For Sexytime Because A Man Tried To Rape Her

Good morning! Here is something terrible to start your day! In January, a Vietnamese woman who runs a spa in Falls Church, Virginia, let a man inside for a shoulder massage even though she wasn't open for business yet....

Joe Arpaio Fine With Sex-Crimes As Long As They’re Against Illegals

GAH. When we pleaded with the universe last week for leading insane racist and pink panty queen Joe Arpaio to be the next high-profile Republican sheriff to become embroiled in a "ghey sex for meth" scandal, we made our...

Guy In Charge of World’s Money Jailed For Sex Attack On Hotel Maid

How are the people in charge of the money treating the people who serve the people in charge of the money these days? Still not so good, it seems! International Monetary Fund chief Dominique Strauss-Kahn was hauled off an...