Our favorite New Jersey hooker who accidentally destroyed Eliot Spitzer’s political career is just a dumb kid trying to make sense of a crazy world, right? And the only interesting thing in her entire life already happened. And she didn’t even know it! She had no idea who Spitzer even was, because who would know those things, being an adult, living in New York, and working for an expensive escort service serving Wall Street men, right? So she finally pops her head out of the media hole, finds Diane Sawyer (who happens to be spending months doing some teevee segment on prostitutes, who are mostly — and tragically — ugly old junkies), and declares that she wants a “singing career.” MORE »