As a famous statistician once said, “Three data points make a trend,” and that is why we can now confidently announce that the Bible study-group-slash-frat house known as the C Street Group stands at the cutting edge of the marital infidelity movement. MORE »

EWWWWWWWWWW Oregon state legislators are filthy! All they talk about is blood and poop and semen. They wrote a bill about this stuff because they are gross. (Also, to protect Women.) Basically it says that before you give the nice lady a Cleveland Steamer, make sure she consents. MORE »

That was a pretty great trick sending all those bloggers to the Scooter Libby trial — is there a better way to get rid of noisy political nuts than sentencing them to fake jury duty forever? MORE »

• “White man to eat you. I am very hungry right now, I will eat you as long as you want me to.” [Craigslist]

• “This is how the Republicans I like to spend the Weekend.” What a mouthful. [Craigslist]
• Andie MacDowell spotted at a Caribou Coffee. Reliable Source spotted her at Olives yesterday, and reports that she’s in town to see a Chinese singer because last summer she “fell in love with all things Chinese.” [Craigslist]
• A lonely voice against the herd mentality of YouTube. [Alternative Hippopotamus]
• Fridays, we try to help you with your fashions. Today, we investigate forgettable trends such as “leggings under skirts” and ankle boots. Leggings under skirts are met with ambivalence. Ankle boots? Well, since no one is reading this, thumbs up to ankle boots because they hold more cubic liters of sperm than flats. [Circle V]

It’s time once again for resident curmudgeonly comics analyst the Comics Curmudgeon to take a stab at explaining Today’s Cartoons. Someone’s got to.

This week, metaphors! Learn why they should be left to the experts, after the jump. Also, there is semen.

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• “A nasty man recently threw me in jail, and several of my least favorite co-workers just ganged up on me in the pages of my own paper. Needless to say, these critics are a bunch of pansy assholes.” J.M. in Sag Harbor asks the Ethicist. [Panopticist]
• “Relentless and totally out of control,” “eager to let you know that she travelled in a world of international intrigue and important people,” who could they possibly be talking about? [Gawker]
• Arianna reads between the telephone lines regarding Libby’s call to Tim Russert. [HuffPo]
• “If only lies left semen stains.” [The Daily Show]
• Jason Zengerle zings Joe Wilson: “Wilson’s op-ed was entitled, ‘Our 27 months of hell.’ A better title might have been, ‘How to turn your 15 minutes into 27 months.’” [TNR's The Plank]
• The WP bundles all the scandal buzzwords into one incoherent mess. (Hey, that’s what blogs are for!) [WP]