Thanks for your suggestions, America! We mostly agreed with your favorites, although a few “dark horses” made the final list because why not. Also, these are only teevee clips, not random D.I.Y. YouTubes of, what, Lego Sarah Palin in steampunk goggles fighting Darth Vader (Ron Paul) the fire-breathing dog with a sack of dildos & unicorn blood. (Someone please make that.) And so above — as a bonus! — we’ve posted the ABSOLUTE best self-made YouTube of 2008, in which the Paultards chase down Sean Hannity on a cold New Hampshire night. Hannity finally escapes into the hotel; the Paultards immediately grow silent until one lone hero yells, “You suck, Sean.” Man, New Hampshire was so much fun, everyone there and not one with a clue… MORE »

After FIVE AND A HALF YEARS, ALAN Colmes has decided to leave Fox News’ top-rated muppet slappy hour Hannity & Colmes, after twelve years. Alan’s character on this long television series was that of a hapless, lanky liberal — probably a heathen Unitarian! — who was always gettin’ bullied around by his wacky Irish Catholic “co-host,” known oil goblin Sean Hannity. It was like The Odd Couple, except about politics and the Culture Wars. We would like to praise Alan for his selfless portrayal of Fox News’ gay commie foil day in and day out, for which he was paid nothing, except maybe a few millions dollars every year. After the jump, we remember Alan’s shining moment, when he “went rogue” (fought back). MORE »

Hmm. It appears as though this is happening next summer. Should we see Sean Hannity’s Bill Ray Cyrus brood over an extended version of “Achy Breaky Heart,” or shall we instead go with Sean Hannity’s Oliver North, who will… sell weapons to us? In musical form? What? [Freedom Concerts '09]

You may have seen this already, on a Liberal website, in which Obama spokesman Robert Gibbs gets in Sean Hannity’s face to ask him why he hates the Jews. This is in response to a question about Bill Ayers. Alan Colmes is his usual “in-house Fox News bitch” self for a while, and then has to mediate, because Robert Gibbs and Sean Hannity are both retardssss. [YouTube]

Sarah Palin continues to avoid the “mainstream gotcha media” wing of yellow black journalists after Katie Couric, the host of a basic news program for old people, proved to be too In The Tank in too many interviews. Since last week’s debate, she’s only granted interviews to such staunch conservative kingpins as Hugh Hewitt, Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity and, today, Bill “William” Kristol of the liberal New York Times. Kristol’s column about it today is called — and may we add that this is hilarious — “The Wright Stuff.” Tomorrow Palin is expected to interview with Montgomery Burns. MORE »

Sarah Palin barely survived Charlie Gibson’s interview, but she did survive, and now she’s in much safer hands for her Second Interview, this time with Sean Hannity. Part one airs tonight at 9 p.m., so be sure to not watch that at all. Fox has released some excerpts from the interview, and there appear to be many questions about this “terribly fucked economy” that average Americans like Ken Layne are losing their minds over. So let’s check out the canned answers that some McCain intern programmed Palin to rattle off. MORE »

This is so great. It’s from Hannity & Colmes, probably last night but definitely sometime recently, and the panel of guests is saying how John Edwards “getting away” with his affair (really?) reveals a double standard — because when Republicans get caught fucking something that isn’t a wife, it taints the whole party, but with Democrats, it just ruins the individual. In other words, we should not trust liberals because John Edwards banged his fake videographer. Anyway, around 2:50, Alan Colmes for the first time in his life starts crushing everyone. MORE »

That jabbering nitwit on Fox just signed a $100 million, five-year deal that will distribute his radio show through Citadel and Clear Channel networks. It’s significantly less than Rush Limbaugh’s recent $400 million, eight-year contract — but still, nothing to sneeze at. So what might Sean Hannity spend his truckloads of cash on? MORE »

Liz Glover has been terrorizing the douchebags in New Hampshire with her pink-and-green Barbie polaroid camera. Why that’s her with famous Respected Intellectual Conservative Bill Kristol! Can you believe he wouldn’t even take a question? [Sigh], there goes another role model. More famous assholes after the jump. MORE »

This afternoon President Michael Huckabee went to celebrate his national landslide with Chuck Norris at Concord, NH’s Barley House, where they would be serving up “Huckaburgers.” A general trend I’m, noticing: At every non-Paul GOP rally, the real story will be how rudely the Paultards are protesting it. No one had a chance of eating a “Huckaburger,” ever. Especially when famous asshole Sean Hannity of Fox News — Paultard Enemy #23ish! — is trying to work his way through. MORE »

* Presidential contenders’ YouTube channels range from “mind-boggling” to “old-fart.” [PrezVid]
* Walnuts! now able to literally wipe his feet on Iraq. [Passport]
* Black-tie Gridiron dinner on Saturday night featured Robert Novak in the role he was born to play. [Firedoglake]
* Margaret Carlson always wanted, but never got Fred Thompson’s johnson. [Newsweek]
* Condoleeza Rice offers to pitch if Sean Hannity will catch. [Raw Story]
* Newt Gingrich’s life to resemble Spanish profanity immersion. [The Swamp]
* Bill Richardson is the “greenest” candidate. [TalkLeft]