Tag Archives: sean hannity

  Geraldo too!

Killer Mike Doesn’t Hit His Wife, And Other Reasons Hip-Hop Is More Moral Than Bill O’Reilly

Kinda!
It’s a common trope, if you are a right-wing bigot: Racism doesn’t hurt black people, hippity-hop rap music hurts black people, what with its jiving and twerking and PULL THOSE PANTS UP, and BACK IN MY DAY! In recent months, Fox News white geniuses Bill O’Reilly, Sean Hannity, Geraldo Rivera and so many others have all done their own cover versions of the same song. If rap music wasn’t oppressing our innocent black children, racism would be over and “reverse racism” would DEFINITELY be over. Read more on Killer Mike Doesn’t Hit His Wife, And Other Reasons Hip-Hop Is More Moral Than Bill O’Reilly…
  Bow down bitches

Use These 5 Black Hippity-Hop Songs To Oppress Sean Hannity’s Lily-White Ass

Sean Hannity knows these are the faces of the True Oppressors.
What is WRONG with Sean Hannity? No, we mean besides the obvious things like his incompletely formed sense of his own masculinity. Hannity had a MELTDOWN over the Confederate Flag on his radio show Wednesday. You see, if retailers are going to get rid of the Confederate flag, he is FINE WITH THAT, but fair’s fair, and they should also ban all that blackity-black music the kids like to twerk to. Right? Because if the Confederate flag is hurtful to black people because of its racist, murderous implications — thanks solely to confessed white supremacist murderer Dylann Roof and for no other reasons at all — then surely rappers who use the N-word in their music are hurting black people just as much as some dumb flag is, right? Read more on Use These 5 Black Hippity-Hop Songs To Oppress Sean Hannity’s Lily-White Ass…
  We Watch So You Don't Have To

The Fartknocker Report: Sarah Palin Takes Summer Vacation, Leaves Fans Lonely, Confused

The Sarah Palin Fartknocker Report, Presented by Fartknocker
For two weeks running, Sarah Palin has not bothered to publish any new videos—and her subscribers have begun to take notice. In the Sarah Palin Channel’s comment sections, they speak to each other in the tones of people who just blew $20 on carnival games and didn’t even win a giant stuffed panda for Jenny Sue. Read more on The Fartknocker Report: Sarah Palin Takes Summer Vacation, Leaves Fans Lonely, Confused…
  We Watch So You Don't Have To

The Fartknocker Report: Sarah Palin Vomits Pre-Digested Content Right Down Your Throathole

Yes, it's the same photo we used the first time. Get it?
In the last seven days, Sarah Palin has published only one video on her subscription-based Internet television failure service, and that one video was a straight pick-up of a post from March, when America’s hardest working half-term governor reminisced about how those “doggone reporters” almost ruined her family bus trip. Read more on The Fartknocker Report: Sarah Palin Vomits Pre-Digested Content Right Down Your Throathole…
  Um WHAT????

Sarah Palin Goes On Fox To Yell At Fox For Molesting Duggar Girls On Fox

Watch the latest video at video.foxnews.comIs Sarah Palin on drugs? We don’t know, but maybe! We hear Alaska is a great place for scoring meth, to buy with your government hand-out checks from sweet drill-baby-drilled oil profits. And maybe those drugs have eated up the itsy bits of Palin’s brain? We’re just asking, with question marks, which makes it OK to say whatever we want. Read more on Sarah Palin Goes On Fox To Yell At Fox For Molesting Duggar Girls On Fox…
  with militias intent

Failed Congressional Candidate Planned To Kill Some Muslims As Love Offering To Sean Hannity

Those aren't crazy eyes at all, no sir
Let’s meet Robert Doggart, who ran last year as an independent for Tennessee’s 4th Congressional District (and lost rather badly, getting just 6.4 percent of the vote). But he’s not the sort of guy to just dabble in politics as a fringe candidate; he decided to face America’s problems head on, plotting to lead a militia attack on a Muslim community in New York, a bit of patriotic direct action that could get him five years in prison, which seems maybe a little light for planning an act of terrorism, but it’s not like he’s a jihadi or anything. Besides, we all know there are no rightwing terrorists. Read more on Failed Congressional Candidate Planned To Kill Some Muslims As Love Offering To Sean Hannity…
  UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Gavin McInnes: Stop Being Miserable, Ladies, And Be Housewives As God Intended

Ah, the good old days
There is this guy, Gavin McInnes, and he is terrible, so of course he is on Fox News, like, all the time. And on Thursday, he went on Sean Hannity’s teevee show to make Sean giggle so hard about how miserable women are because feminism won’t let them stay home and be glorified like in the good old days. What, you think we’re joking? We are not. Read more on Gavin McInnes: Stop Being Miserable, Ladies, And Be Housewives As God Intended…
  Now we know

Jeb ‘The Smart One’ Bush Determined To Prove He’s Just As Stupid As His Brother

Yes, he's that dumb
Jeb Bush has dreamed of being president since, oh, the last century. His dumb big brother got to skip ahead of him (UNFAIR, Dad), but now it is finally Jeb’s turn. So given his decades of dreaming and scheming and preparationing, you’d think he would know how to answer the most obvious question he will be asked during his not-yet-official campaign: Are you a fucking idiot just like your brother? Read more on Jeb ‘The Smart One’ Bush Determined To Prove He’s Just As Stupid As His Brother…
  A victory for feminism!

Rand Paul: I Don’t Hate Women, I’m An Equal Opportunity Dick

He is genitals blind and will yell at ANYONE
Rand Paul has had a rough couple of days since he announced that he will be the next, LOL, president of these United States. He spent Day One being mocked ruthlessly on the intertubes for the disaster that is his campaign website, filled with misspelled words like “eductation,” ridiculous swag (hoodies and skull caps, Senator? Really?), and a page of “endorsements” from German stock photos. Read more on Rand Paul: I Don’t Hate Women, I’m An Equal Opportunity Dick…
  nsfw

Sean Hannity To That Pussy Obama: Do You Even Crossfit, Bro?

BRAH, DOES THE PRESIDENT EVEN LIFT? Sean Hannity lifts. Sean Hannity is a big MMA-fighter in training. Sean Hannity finally has found away to deal with the aggression inherent in having to wake up every day as SUCH A BADASS. Hannity is so much tougher, TOO MUCH TOUGHER than that dumb pussy Barack Obama, who was resoundingly elected president twice. Barack Obama works out in mom jeans, haw haw haw. He probably doesn’t even know what Creatine is. Everybody, check out how ripped Sean Hannity is: Read more on Sean Hannity To That Pussy Obama: Do You Even Crossfit, Bro?…
  Did You Ever Notice Liberals Are Stupid? What's Up With That?

Ladies, Sean Hannity Can See Into Your Baby Caves

Suck it, Jon Stewart. Now THIS is comedy.
It turns out that CPAC 2015 was pretty much a Cavalcade of Conservative Comedy. In addition to the sly wit of Rick Santorum’s Birther joke, Sean Hannity did this hilarious routine about how Barack Obama keeps blaming Bush for everything! Talk about a fresh idea! Except it sort of went all cattywampus at the end: Read more on Ladies, Sean Hannity Can See Into Your Baby Caves…
  Fox Hix Nix Vax Fax

Fox News Injects Known Toxins Into Vaccination Discussion

The stupid is growing
Now that at least a part of the Wingnut Wing of the Republican Party has decided there’s a debate about basic medical facts, like whether vaccines or even hand-washing should be mandatory, it stands to reason that Fox News wants in on the fun as well. Read more on Fox News Injects Known Toxins Into Vaccination Discussion…
  Papa Bear versus Mama Grizzly

Bill O’Reilly And Sarah Palin Engage In War Of Wits. Both Lose

Sore loser, winner, whatever
Who would win a battle o’ the brains: Bill O’Reilly or Sarah Palin? Ha, that’s a trick question because the correct answer is “Who cares? Just pass the popcorn!” The other day, Bill O’Reilly, winner of all the Very Serious Journalism awards, reported that lol, a bunch of doofus idiots are pretending to maybe run for president in 2016, like Sarah Palin and Donald Trump and Chris Christie, who apparently is as absurd a maybe-candidate as Palin and Trump, though we’re not sure how that works since Christie at least has a real job, but OK, why not? Read more on Bill O’Reilly And Sarah Palin Engage In War Of Wits. Both Lose…
  We can't even count high enough

23 Times Fox News Sh*t The Bed, You Are Welcome

So you know how Fox News, America’s No. 1 News Source for Your Racist Uncle, got into that little dustup with Le Gay Paree over, you know, how France and England had created a bunch of Muslims-only Shariah paradises where good and decent Christian folk weren’t allowed, which, well, wasn’t compleeeeeeeetely accurate? Of course you do. Dok told you all about it, and we know that you read this mommyblog and recipe hub with the fervor of a teenage boy on Pornhub. And so you also know that the mayor of Paris is not entirely thrilled: Read more on 23 Times Fox News Sh*t The Bed, You Are Welcome…
  Fox Apology For Benghazi Coverage Scheduled For June 2019

Fox News’ Statements No Longer Operative, Osama Bin Laden Not Holed Up In Buckingham Palace

It's like a French TV version of Wonkette!
Drudge Sirens! Fox News actually apologized for spreading a completely made-up story about supposed “no-go zones” in England and France — areas where officials supposedly have agreed to let Muslims run things according to the dictates of Sharia, without interference from police or fire services, and where non-Muslims enter at the risk of their own lives. On Saturday night, when even Fox News addicts aren’t watching TV, Fox’s Julie Banderas offered this “correction” to a myth the network had been pushing since shortly after the terrorist attacks in Paris: Read more on Fox News’ Statements No Longer Operative, Osama Bin Laden Not Holed Up In Buckingham Palace…
  Gun Radio: A Radio Show For Guns

George Zimmerman: Be Sure To Buy Your ‘Killing Unarmed Black Kids’ Insurance!

Ready for all comers
George Zimmerman has a lot of free time. His notoriety prevents him from seeking conventional employment, evidently, and he got fired from his last unpaid gig in that the owner of the gun shop he was lurking behind at night for security told him to stop it already. Plus there’s that price on his head. Read more on George Zimmerman: Be Sure To Buy Your ‘Killing Unarmed Black Kids’ Insurance!…