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Tag: scott desjarlais

there's that appleheaded vagina mouth we love so much

Donald Trump Doing Terrific With Dudes Who Cheated On Their Wives

Sure, it's one thing to win the approval of neo-Nazis, the former grand imperial poobah of the KKK, and Scott Baio. But Donald Trump is also making inroads with Very Serious Republicans who are Very Serious about family values -- when...

Love Child! Stay Away From David Vitter Or He Will Bortion You (Allegedly)

Sen. David Vitter, the family values Republican from Adult Diapers, Louisiana, would like to be governor. And he would also like everyone to stop asking him about that time he committed a "very serious sin" by banging hookers -- not...
Maybe this is happening because Jesus hates you.

Oh No, Josh Duggar’s Cheatin’ Penis Makes The Family Values Crowd Look Bad!

Oh no, Josh Duggar has strayed from his Christian marriage by getting on the internet to find strange hoo-ha to dip his Duggar Stick into, and the Family Research Council, AKA the Southern Poverty Law Center-designated "family values" hate group where...
Fun-employed

Family Values Republicans Just Fine With Gross Duggar Family Sex-Criming

Are we even remotely surprised that the oh-so-holy Family ValuesTM Duggars have been keeping a dirty secret about that time Josh Duggar repeatedly molested his sisters, and his parents knew and did not do a goddamned thing about it, except...

Tennessee Genius Scott DesJarlais: ‘Religious Freedom’ Will Unleash Muslim Terror Zombie Mummies

If there's anything to be learned from the flap over MSNBC's mean cereal-based tweet, it's that you should never reduce people to one-dimensional stereotypes. (OK, that and MSNBC will lean backwards to placate screamy butthurt Republicans.) And so, with...

Pro-Life Tennessee Congressman Just Having All The Abortions So No One Else Has To

Remember Scott DesJarlais? Of course you do. He is the "pro-life congressman" who whined at (one of) his (many) mistress(es) to have an abortion -- while recording the telephone call in which he pressured her (with his whining)? Well,...

Get Ready For Your Close-Up, Tea Bag Pro-Life Congressman Who Pressured His Mistress To ‘Bortion His Baby

Bitches. All you're trying to do is treat their foot fungus or whatever, and they hold you down and rape you probably, and then they tell you they are on the Pill or something, and then they get your...