Are you FRIGHTENED yet, citizens? Abraham Lincoln would not have cared for this at all, these sinister libtards “working in the shadows” of the publicly available Internet. Abraham Lincoln would be crying like an eagle. [via Matt Yglesias]

John Boehner made this funny thriller movie last week, but guess what, we just saw it for the first time, so deal. It’s about how Barack Obama is the Muslim who caused 9/11 and wants more white people to die, so vote Republican next time you vote on something! (Can you imagine how excited the Republican leadership would be if a few American cities got nuked under Obama’s watch?) [YouTube]