Tag Archives: saxby chambliss

  Obviously a distraction from SomethingElseGhazi

GOP Senators Would Rather Not Talk About Torture, Thanks. Or ‘Torture.’

Still the worst
It sure would be nice if we could put aside our partisan differences for just one half of one second to agree that torturing people — by, for example, raping prisoners with food, or, for another example, killing them — is bad and wrong, and we shouldn’t do that. But yeah, sure, right, whatEVER. This is America, where the one and only time we can agree on anything at all is that Nazis suck. Read more on GOP Senators Would Rather Not Talk About Torture, Thanks. Or ‘Torture.’…
  Our Cold Dead Hands

Georgia Rep. Jack Kingston Pretty Fed Up With This ‘Research’ From This ‘Centers for Disease Control and Prevention’

In today’s latest example of why primary elections mean that we can’t have nice things, Georgia Rep. Jack Kingston (R-Waffle House) has decided that he is NOT losing his chance at Saxby Chambliss’s Senate seat just because he once said that there might be a way for research to guide public policy as it relates to firearms, no sir! Flashback to December 2012, following the CIA-Mossad false flag operation tragedy at Sandy Hook Elementary School, when the 2014 midterms were but a twinkle in the eye of long-serving members of the House, like Jack Kingston, who has represented southeastern Jaw-juh since FOREVER 1993. Back then, Kingston said this: less than a week after the Newtown shootings […] [Kingston] told a local TV station that he wanted to see more research done to understand mass shootings. “Let’s let the data lead rather than our political opinions.” Ah, but then B. Hussein Soetoro took time away from his busy schedule of Destroying Our Once Great Nation and agreed with Rep. Kingston! Obama slapped $10 million into his latest budget for additional research from the CDC, which is a slight improvement on the $0 CDC currently spends on gun violence research. And when Rep. Kingston — who chairs the Appropriations Committee — told his constituents, “I think we can find some common ground,” Beltway centrist types got super-excited, because bipartisanship gives these people a chubby. Read more on Georgia Rep. Jack Kingston Pretty Fed Up With This ‘Research’ From This ‘Centers for Disease Control and Prevention’…
  Boys will be boys

Dear Military: Please Stop Sexually Assaulting Ladies At Legal Conferences On Sexual Assault, And Everywhere Else

So we want to applaud folks like Senator Kirsten Gillibrand (D-NY) who are fighting the good fight to stop all the sexual assaulting in our military. What’s the big deal, though? Can chicks just not handle a little afternoon raping? Don’t they know that boys will be boys, and that boobs wouldn’t be groped if God had not made boobs so perky and grope-able? Totally the Big Guy’s fault. Well, at least the military is having more training about sexual assault, and it’s not like the Army top sexual assault prosecutor would go to a training on sexual assault and grope a lady, because that would be ALL THE FUCKED UP, KATIE. Per Stars and Stripes: The top Army prosecutor for sexual assault cases has been suspended after a lawyer who worked for him recently reported he’d groped her and tried to kiss her at a sexual-assault legal conference more than two years ago. For serious, Army? Of all the people you have to choose from to deal with this issue, how come you can’t find someone who will at least wait until the sexual assault legal conference is over before sexually assaulting a woman? Allegedly. Read more on Dear Military: Please Stop Sexually Assaulting Ladies At Legal Conferences On Sexual Assault, And Everywhere Else…
  joey wilson's war

Joe Wilson Wants To Know Why Obama Cares More About Gassed Children In Syria Than Benghazi & IRS Atrocities

In a desperate bid to be remembered for something even stupider than yelling “You lie!” about a factual statement in a presidential address, Joe Wilson used his time at Wednesday’s House hearings on whether to blow stuff up in Syria to ask, now wait one darn minute here, why are we even talking about this when the IRS gassed tea party groups’ tax exemptions to death? What about the red line of Obamacare? Shouldn’t we use cruise missiles on the sequester? All excellent questions! Read more on Joe Wilson Wants To Know Why Obama Cares More About Gassed Children In Syria Than Benghazi & IRS Atrocities…
  prism planet

Politicians Welcome Chance To Discuss This NSA Surveillance Monster They Hid In The Basement

Over the weekend, various security officials and congresscritters were forced to go on the morning yap shows or talk to the press about the secret data collection programs exposed by the Guardian over the weekend. Some of them took this opportunity to explain why they were glad, GLAD, that we are finally having a national conversation about the classified top secret eavesdropping and metadata collection programs that they hid from the American people. Others patiently warned us that this classified top secret eavesdropping and metadata collection program had definitely prevented terror but that they couldn’t tell us exactly HOW it prevented terror, because that is secret, silly! But it is definitely keeping us safe, although it also missed the Boston Marathon bombings, and the Times Square bombing attempt, and the Fort Hood shooting. And still others just stressed that the classified top secret eavesdropping program is somehow effective enough to prevent terrorism but not so effective as to actually compromise anyone’s privacy. Below, a rundown of the various machinations and meltdowns! Read more on Politicians Welcome Chance To Discuss This NSA Surveillance Monster They Hid In The Basement…
  analogies are the real terrorists

Georgia GOP Senate Candidate Paul Broun Fears IRS Papercut More Than Al Qaeda, Because They Are Same Thing

Do you cower in fear at the beginning of every April, with that fear intensifying until the middle of the month, when you have a nervous breakdown and open that Y2K bunker you stupidly built but now only use once a year? Because as we all know, the middle of the April is when the Tax Man Cometh, and HE IS TO BE FEARED!!!1! But just in case you were wondering how much fear you should be in, rat-faced, science-denying, goat-blowing ass-fer-brains Congressman Paul Bro un (R-GA, natch) wants to ensure the maximum amount of fear about the IRS: In a recent poll for his Senate campaign, Rep. Paul Broun (R-GA.) compares the Internal Revenue Service to a terrorist group, asking voters, “When you go to your mailbox or answer your phone, who do you fear more?” The poll, posted on Broun’s campaign website, lists “IRS” and “Al-Qaeda” as the two possible responses. Because thousands of people dying in a fiery collision of planes and buildings is totally the exact same thing as paper-pushers in Cleveland asking for more information so you can get government-sanctioned tax welfare. This is exactly what people meant when they said, “Never Forget.”   Read more on Georgia GOP Senate Candidate Paul Broun Fears IRS Papercut More Than Al Qaeda, Because They Are Same Thing…
  Boys will be boys

GOP: Rape Is Just Nature’s Way of Keeping Women Out of Military

Holy fucking shitbags, GOP, are you even trying to compete for the womyn vote anymore? If you are, you are doing a fantastically terrible job and it, and all libruls should just hope you continue talking right up to election day, because you are seriously going above and beyond the call of duty. The Senate Armed Services Committee held a hearing on the rampant sexual assault epidemic that is happening all over the military. You know – rapes, groping, pats on the ass, sexual intimidation, things womyn whine about while they are on the rag, right? Chicks, man. First up, we have Sen. Grumpy McPoopypants from Arizona. We are used to chuckling at McCain because he is a dottering olde fool who seems cranky all the time, but this time he went from absent-minded “I don’t know how many houses I own” and calling his wife a trollop cunt to straight up sexist piece of ratshit: Sen. John McCain is so disturbed by rampant sexual assault in the military that he cannot give his “unconditional support” to women thinking of joining the armed services. Notice how he doesn’t say that men are the problem? Apparently, the problem with 26,000 women (and some men) facing sexual assault is just too many damn women. You ladies would be better off just cleaning or something, k? You do not have John McCain’s “unconditional support” to volunteer to risk your FUCKING LIVES to protect this cowardly, wrinkly waste of skin yapping his oversized jowls about not supporting you. Here’s a suggestion: men should stop being rapey, and if they persist, perhaps kick their ass out of the military and make the military FUCKING SAFE. Perhaps you can get off your pathetic ass and write a piece of legislation that makes it better, rather than just telling women to think twice about joining the military. But then, did things get worse with old Republican men opening their cockholsters about rapes in the military? Oh, Lucy, they did! Read more on GOP: Rape Is Just Nature’s Way of Keeping Women Out of Military…
  How can we miss you if you don't stay away?

Bob Barr To Attempt Worst Comeback Tour Since Great White

Speaking of the resurrection of hateful twats, did you guys hear that Bob Barr wants to return to Congress? America had a very close call last year with the state of Georgia, when human-shaped fluffernutter Newt Gingrich came within a couple of thousand delegates of being the GOP’s nominee for president instead of whatshisname, the guy with the hair. Then Saxby Chambliss, a man we know must be horrible because the NRA loves him, announced his retirement from the Senate. Perhaps America would get lucky and he would be replaced with someone who is not a total cockwagon? Read more on Bob Barr To Attempt Worst Comeback Tour Since Great White…
  show us your wide stance baby

Georgia Senator Saxby Chambliss Would Like You To Know How Gay He’s Not

Republican senator and Vietnam-deferring uber-patriot Saxby Chambliss doesn’t care how many of his fellow Republicans, like Ohio Sen. Rob Portman, come out of the closet to support equal rights. Saxby isn’t going to change his mind, because he is NOT gay. Repeat: He is NOT gay. When asked if his views had changed on gay marriage, the Georgia Republican quipped: “I’m not gay. So I’m not going to marry one.” That makes perfect sense, of course, because everyone knows that’s exactly how marriage equality works. If you let the gays gay-marry each other, the not gays like Saxby will be forced to get gay married too, or it is off to the FEMA Camps for him, where he will be fed to lions and also droned. Read more on Georgia Senator Saxby Chambliss Would Like You To Know How Gay He’s Not…
  good for bloggers bad for everyone else

Rep. Paul Broun Not Content With Making House GOP Look Dumb, Will Run For Senate Instead

The wait is over! After weeks of breathless anticipation (and one titillating Twitter rumor), Georgia Rep. Paul Broun has announced he is running for United States Senate, after an illustrious, storied career in the House that has lasted all of five years, and a chunk of a sixth. While everybody else is focusing on which Republican dunderhead will run for the vacated seat up in Massachusetts, speculation has been quietly brewing over who will run for the open seat of Sen. Saxby “Map Genius” Chambliss. And right now, our hero Broun is the only one in the running! Read more on Rep. Paul Broun Not Content With Making House GOP Look Dumb, Will Run For Senate Instead…
  Hide Your Goats Hide Your Kids

Erick Erickson Asks Voices In His Head Whether He Should Run For Senate

One of the easily digestible Nuggets O’ Conventional Wisdom to come out of the 2012 elections is that while Tea Party purists whose conservative purity glowed with white-hot rage often managed to win GOP primaries, that very ideological intensity was just as likely to turn off voters in the general election. Needless to say, since teabaggers know that “conventional wisdom” is composed of the Lamestream Media’s treasonous lies and poop, the smart money in Teabag Nation is that, in order to really win over the American people, future GOP candidates need to be even more screamingly conservative, or maybe secede and start a new country without so many lazypants voters who just want free stuff. All of which is is to say that no one should be terribly surprised that intrepid pile of moist journalism Erick Erickson is “prayerfully considering” a primary challenge against Georgia Sen. Saxby Chambliss (R-Old Man Smell) in 2014. We think that’s a really swell idea, if only because of the mileage we can get out of reminding people that the Son Of Erick likes to do things like attempt credit card fraud to “test the integrity” of campaign finance, or to call a retiring Supreme Court Justice a “goat-fucking child molester.” (But it’s OK, because he apologized, and he loves America really a lot.) Read more on Erick Erickson Asks Voices In His Head Whether He Should Run For Senate…
  the noob caucus

Dumb Republican Senators Thought Osama Corpse Photoshop Was Real

Considering the Obama administration has made it clear they have not and will not release any photos of Osama bin Laden’s corpse, most people would realize the fakes floating around the Internet, which are not even Photoshopped all that well, are not real. Republican Senators Saxby Chambliss, Kelly Ayotte, and Scott Brown, however, saw these on somebody’s LiveJournal or whatever and decided they had been privileged with seeing classified photos. “The head area, obviously, he had been wounded. I can’t describe it –- give any better description than that,” Ayotte said, pretending she was important enough to be given access to the bin Laden pixx but wasn’t really allowed to discuss them. These senators apparently forgot the Internet is not just available to them. Read more on Dumb Republican Senators Thought Osama Corpse Photoshop Was Real…
  your future senate leadership

Unknown Hero In Saxby Chambliss’ Office Pens ‘Faggots’ Comment On Blog

In all the revelry over yesterday’s successful filibuster against overturning Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell, somebody in Saxby Chambliss’ Atlanta office was on the gay politics blog Joe.My.God. and came up with a unique solution to the question of gays serving in the military: “All Faggots must die.” This person, calling himself “Jimmy,” posted this brilliant plan in the comments of a post on the failure of the cloture vote, and then the gays looked up his IP address, which told them it came from Saxby Chambliss’ office. Saxby Chambliss is now investigating who did this, because that man deserves a promotion. Read more on Unknown Hero In Saxby Chambliss’ Office Pens ‘Faggots’ Comment On Blog…
  today in naked old men

WaPo Article Clearly Given Headline Before Reporter Talked To Saxby Chambliss

This article is basically great. Because naked penis/vag shower run-ins, it seems, are the norm! More normal than apple pie or baseball or Cleveland Steamers: “The private gyms are sanctuaries where lawmakers can huff, puff and disrobe knowing that only fellow members will see them.” Giggle! Read more on WaPo Article Clearly Given Headline Before Reporter Talked To Saxby Chambliss…
  real american georgia

Saxby Chambliss Thinks Georgia Looks Like *This*

Georgia slaveowner Sen. Saxby Chambliss recently participated in this thing from National Geographic, which “invited all 100 U.S. Senators to draw a map of their home state from memory and to label at least three important places.” Most of the participating Senators sketched their states admirably. Chambliss, meanwhile, drew Mississippi, but with more saw teeth on the borders (to keep the Africans out) and a rectangle called “mountains.” This is truly catastrophic. [National Geographic] Read more on Saxby Chambliss Thinks Georgia Looks Like *This*…
  the last election

Actual Confederate Owner Of Slave Plantations Wins Georgia Runoff

Ha ha, Jim Martin lost like a little gay baby, and now we know why Obama never campaigned in the state for him: his two-time Senate election losingness in the same election. “With 90 percent of the state’s precincts reporting in Tuesday’s runoff election, Mr. Chambliss had 59 percent of the vote, and his Democratic challenger, Jim Martin, had 41 percent.” So this means that 2008 wasn’t just a good year for Republicans, but the best year. Now we will go back to never posting about dumb Saxby Chambliss, but if we have to, we’ll always have the perfect boob-grabbing photo. [NYT] Read more on Actual Confederate Owner Of Slave Plantations Wins Georgia Runoff…