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Posts Tagged ‘satan’

BAN CABLE NEWS

Lou Dobbs And Bill O’Reilly Have Very Serious Discussion About Satan

Tuesday, November 17th, 2009

Mexican deerhunting gang target and fat dunderhead Lou Dobbs went on Bill O’Reilly’s show last night to discuss, let’s see here, who gives a fuck. But skip ahead to :35 for a comical moment in which O’Reilly asks, dead seriously and out of nowhere, “Is Barack Obama the Devil?” Lou Dobbs doesn’t miss a beat and immediately begins his meandering answer, with utter Seriousness. This is a conversation between two theoretically self-aware adult humans! MORE »


GOD'S WORK

So That Insane Indiscriminate Book Burning?: Three Penguin Classics In An Indoor Garbage Can

Friday, November 13th, 2009


Recall the famed Halloween Book Burning Plot of the Amazing Grace Baptist Church, at which a piece of music’s or book’s very existence alone was enough to place it squarely on the side of the Devil, Satan. Satan was most displeased, for how would he convince people to come be homosexuals with him in hell without… contemporary Christian music! This is why the book burning was held indoors, in a single garbage can, where Satan has no jurisdiction. MORE »


WONKETTE ART REVIEW

‘Real American’ Records Actual Historical Event In Beautiful Painting

Tuesday, October 6th, 2009

A bunch of you have sent us a link to this painting by a fellow named Jon McNaughton, depicting the divine event that took place during the hot Philadelphia summer of 1787, when Jeebus flew to America from his ice cave on Pluto to deliver the U.S. Constitution to some brat before an in-studio audience consisting of George Washington, Mister Hollywood, Liberal News Reporter, Satan, and others. “Jon McNaughton would like to set the record straight,” we read. MORE »


SATAN

Peggy Noonan Displeased With Mika Brzezinski’s Vulgar Footwear

Friday, May 29th, 2009

Peggy Noonan warped to MSNBC this morning for a pot of tea and pleasant conversation about the current Politicks, but what didst she see? The Devill-Womman, Mika Brzezinski, clad in vulgarian foot-leathers! “They were an X-rated fantasy walking on Mika’s feet,” our regina declares, and later she compounds that they are “a mortal sin, on her feet.” This demon bull whore Mika was later slaughtered, under Peggington’s watch. You may watch film-tapes of these events at the Arianna Huffington’s Internet Post, which darest not offer Em-Bed Code for its film-tapes. [Huffington Post]


SATAN IS REAL

6.66 Million On Unemployment, Because of the Devil

Thursday, May 21st, 2009

Because Obama is the Antichrist!
The good news is that new unemployment claims were down a bit from the previous terrible week. The bad news is that there were more new jobless people than dumb economists had predicted. The worse news is that we now have 6.66 million people getting unemployment benefits, which proves the Devil is not only a true thing, but He’s here in America, having fun. Oh also millions more have just completely given up even looking for work, and their unemployment payments ran out long ago. [Bloomberg]


BIGGER THAN JESUS

John McCain’s Twitter Thinks It’s Better Than Our Lord Jesus Christ

Friday, April 3rd, 2009

'I don't know which will go first - rock 'n' roll or Christianity. '
The super-dumb full-of-shit jingoistic Magic 8-Ball known as “John McCain’s twatbot” crapped this out today: “America has been and remains the greatest force for good in history.” Eric Spiegelman wonders why John McCain is pissing on Christ’s grave. [Bus Your Own Tray]


THE DEVIL WILL SEE YOU NOW

Obama Shocker: New President Gives Satanic Sign To His Zombie Followers

Tuesday, January 20th, 2009

'And the whole damn place goes crazy twice, and it's once for the devil and once for Christ ....'
Sure is fun to have a black guy as president, what with the hope and all, and what an exciting day of inaugural inauguration events …. OH WHAT IN THE HELL BARACK IS DOING THE DEVIL-HORN HAND-SIGN! MORE »


ISN'T THAT SPECIAL?

Friday, October 24th, 2008

FOX NEWS COLUMNIST TAKES A STAND, AGAINST SATAN, AND THE COMMENTS ARE HILARIOUS: Some dildo asks, “Could Lucifer play a role in this presidential election?” And then he provides … well, so much material for these libtard commenters. [Fox News]


JESUSLAND

South Carolina Mayor ‘Just Curious’ If Obama’s the Antichrist, From The Bible

Monday, September 29th, 2008

The brave mayor of some little South Carolina suburb has been very busy forwarding everybody some emails (and probably this old Wonkette post) about whether that colored fellow Barack Obama is perhaps some creature sent by The Devil to have a mythological war with Dead Jesus — you know, the Anti-Christ! MORE »


DEBATABLE

Main Stream Media Ignores Scurrilous Rumors, But Picks Up Completely Insane Ones

Friday, August 15th, 2008

Everyone should thank CNN today for thoroughly debunking the “rumor” that Barack Obama is the Antichrist (seriously, this is somehow classified as a “rumor,” that Obama may have magical powers). The big headline, “OBAMA THE ANTICHRIST?” along with the subhed claiming that this is a real “debate” online and thousands of other images of ANTICHRIST ANTICHRIST EVIL SATAN were very necessary for the viewers watching said debunking. Raw Story has the video. Oh and let’s thank CNN for covering this same thing yesterday, too. [Raw Story]


STILL A DICK

Crippled War Vets Tell Cheney To Get Bent

Monday, July 28th, 2008

Despised warmonger Dick Cheney continues to be an evil sack of shit who can’t even pretend to like war veterans. The hate-filled colostomy bag was scheduled to lecture a group of injured war veterans about how he evaded the draft through five deferments, but the veterans group finally told him to get fucked after he demanded the maimed heroes be sequestered for hours before he delivered his bitter propaganda. MORE »