sarah palin

Here’s a huge surprise: Sarah Palin is nauseated and disgusted that Barack Obama is “Palling Around with [a] Cop-Killer Advocate” who she can’t even name, because the nominee she’s referring to, Debo Adegbile, is just too disgusting and horrifying to even mention, and is also quite blackity-blackblackblack, but that is definitely not the issue here, […]

Hey kids! Is your grifting game going a little sideways lately? Do you need to learn from the big girls? Then let us head over to OpenSecrets.org and check on what Sarah Palin’s SarahPAC is up to lately, as reported to the tyrants of the FEC. In our latest edition of Sarah Palin Picked Your […]

One day, 17 or 8 or 92 years ago, when wise and beneficent Leadership Shower Sarah Palin was first becoming the national Thought Leader we know and know today, she said a thing, and that thing was that Barack Nobummer was such a weak homosexual girly man (paraphrase) that Vladimir Putin would do sex in […]

Oh, this is a very special update to yesterday’s YOOGE Donald Trump News from Ghost Breitbart’s Internet Home for the Perpetually Aggrieved. As you may recall, rancid Breitbart horcrux Matthew Boyle discovered a terrible, terrible thing about Buzzfeed writer McKay Coppins: Coppins wrote something negative about Trump, and said unthinkable things, despicable things, things so […]

Sarah Palin has been doin’ some book learnin’ and appears to have finally made it all the way through George Orwell’s Animal Farm, which was probably pretty hard for her, let’s be honest. She’s so excited about her ever-growing love for Orwell and her ever-growing certainty that Bamz is making 1984 happen all over your […]

So how about that State of the Union response, huh? No, not Mike Lee, though we’re sure that was adorable. Nope, not Rand Paul. We couldn’t even find his speech. The lady one. No, not the Spanglish-speaking one. The OTHER lady. The one that spoke American but gave the same speech. Cathy John Jacob Jingleheimer […]

We all know about how Sarah Palin makes sure to read all the newspapers in existence, though if you ask her about that, you’re being a bitch and you get what you deserve. In stark contrast to the voracious reading habits of Ms. Palin, we have the State Attorney for Florida’s Fourth Judicial Circuit Court, […]

Happy Martin Luther King Junior Day, everybody! If you are a normal person and not a terrible grasping morass of stupid like some internet conservatives, you’ve probably spent the day thus far one of three ways: (1) sleeping off your hangover because you treated Sunday like a Saturday; (2) having to work and being angry […]

For a half-term grifter/failed vice presidential candidate, Sarah Palin’s half-life has been truly lengthy and remarkable. She is the cockroach of low culture. Empires will rise and fall, and there will be Sarah Palin, getting a crappy teevee show for being Sarah Palin. And where Sarah is, there is also bitchy ill-will towards anyone she […]

Welcome, wonkeesters, to another edition of Derp Roundup, the weekly feature where we hose down the news, filter out the stories that weren’t quite worth a whole post but too stoopid to ignore altogether, spray the whole mess with cheap booze, and bring you the runoff. Enjoy! Our first story violates the entire premise of […]

Hey, did you know that Celebrity Big Brother is still a thing that is on teevee in merry old England? Us neither! But now we do, because boxing great Evander Holyfield showed up to explain to his housemates about how being gay is unnatural and just like being handicapped. Responding to [housemate] Luisa who said […]

Last night a story about Sarah Palin made its way around the Internet that was so grotesquely sexist that we were put in the disgusting, angersome position of having to defend Sarah Palin. It basically called her a whore a bunch for slutty-sluttin’ it up in college — PS did you know she also spread […]

It would be so exciting to live in a country where “Obamacare Medical Codes Confirm: Execution by Beheading To Be Implemented in America”, but PolitiFact says no, we cannot live there because there is a fire on its pants. Why is PolitiFact so mean to our childlike sense of wonder and our precious need to […]

Hey besties, Wow, it’s Crissmass again! So fun, espcially here in AK (that’s alaskan for Alaska) where Santa Klaze has his summer home and its so dark in winter, it makes me sad but then I go Tanning and it helps a lot, and I look tan then too which also is helps ya know. […]

Hello librul commie free-speech-hatin’ intolerants, who do not understand how the First Amendment protects your right to arglebargle on the teevee as long as it is the right kind of arglebargle. (Hint: Gay-hating is the right kind. Wishing someone would dookie in Sarah Palin’s mouth is the wrong kind. Get it? No, neither do we. […]