• Reliable Source: Camille Paglia on Condoleezza Rice: “She has advanced the persona of the first woman president way beyond any other woman in my lifetime.”… Kenny Chesney will perform at White House dinner for Australian Prime Minister John Howard… D.C.’s Sara Albert, of “America’s Next Top Model,” is leaving her think tank job to pursue modeling. [WP]

• Inside the Beltway: Tucker Carlson is looking at homes in Old Town Alexandria. [WT]
• Lloyd Grove’s Lowdown: Pataki knows his ethanol… Lewis Black: “For those of you who are Democrats and those of you who are Republicans, in 2008, please, don’t do anything!… If you’re for Hillary, stuff it! No! Not eight more years with them.” [NYDN]

This week DC was packed with has-beens and also-rans, still probably looking better than everyone else. Chuck Norris enjoyed a steak, but wasn’t on a stake-out. Bo Derek has traded in the couture for the sale down the street. Madeleine Albright has a book to hawk (but she’s a dove), Ari Fleischer thinks his Blackberry has too many buttons, and Grover Norquist wants everyone to know how his name is spelled. Plus your latest installment of “Where is George Stephanopoulos This Week?,” and a raft of reality TV stars must have washed up on the banks of the Potomac. Test your memory after the jump!

The month of May has come, when every lusty heart beginneth to blossom, and to bring forth fruit! Readers, bring forth fruit in the form of sightings, then send the juicy tidbits to us via email, with “Wonk’d” or “Sighting” in the subject line (along with the name of your heart’s desire!). Flourish in tipstery deeds! Gracious thanks!

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Today’s Wonk’d — the second this week, after Tuesday’s bonus installment — catches the famous-for-DC and famous-for-famous acting like shrinking violets. Both Wolf Blitzer and Dave Chappelle sidestep admirers, while Tiki Barber and James Carville embrace the zeitgeist.

Arlen Specter and Chris Matthews can’t be bothered to acknowledge anyone. But Michael Chertoff is approachable, and America’s Next Top Model hangs out at DC’s current yuppie café. Read on! Ask where to find the celebritocracy, and we provide the answers!

Tipsters, you are the lifeblood of Wonk’d. Please keep sending all of your palpitating tips to us via email, with “Wonk’d” or “Sighting” in the subject line (along with the name of the spotted famous entity). Muchas gracias!

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