Wonkette

Jesse Ventura, the former governor of Minnesota, has given the collective electorate blue balls for a whole week. We’ve been anxiously awaiting his declaration of candidacy for Senate against incumbent Republican Norm “Boxcar Willie” Coleman and Democrat Al Franken, who used to be a comedian once. But then Jesse Ventura went on the Larry King last night and said he wouldn’t be running after all, boo. MORE »

Oh Tim, you are making everybody feel like a slacker today, when we were already feeling sad. Your last blog thing on MSNBC was posted at 9:50 a.m. Friday, a few hours before you collapsed while doing voiceovers for Sunday’s Meet the Press. You talked about Obama’s new anti-smear team on the Internet, and plugged your Sunday show, which was to feature Obama and McCain surrogates Joe Biden and Lindsey Graham debating each other, which would actually be pretty lame. But still …. [RUSSERT ON POLITICS]

We don’t know what the hell’s going on, and headquarters hasn’t even bothered sending one of those “tech’s on it!” e-mails for the past few hours, so who knows what’s wrong. In any case, while they shop for new hamsters for the exercise wheel that apparently powers Wonkette’s web server, we will continue to try to post a few things, maybe, until we give up and start drinking because what the hell, it’s 5 o’clock on a Friday. Also, we sent this “I’m Sorry” card to all of you, individually, but don’t get upset if you don’t receive it, because everything’s broken.