Tag: rumors

VA Nominee Dr. Ronny Jackson Grabs Two Beers, Pops Airplane Door, Slides Away Into History

Add 'Ronny Jackson' to your list of items to be included in 'Trivial Pursuit: The Trump Years'

Trump Supports V.A. Pick Dr. Ronny Jackson, While Driving Bus Over Ronny-Jackson-Shaped Bump

Donald Trump sure knows how to pick 'em!

Dr. Ronny Jackson’s VA Confirmation ‘Delayed’ Even After He Assures Senate It’s Not Fat

Wait, we thought he was affable. Is he still affable?

Anthony Scaramucci Still Fired, An Asshole

The real question: How much did Scaramucci pay people to say he was saying this?
What could they possibly be trying to distract from?

Guess Matt Drudge Forgot He Already Admitted ‘Bill Clinton’s Love Child’ Story Was Bunk. Huh!

Does Matt Drudge have Alzheimer's? We are just asking questions!

How Many Broom Closets At 30 Rock Have Joe And Mika Used To Bump Uglies?

Or should we ask how many they've NOT banged in?
But I thought I hated fags real good too!

Kim Davis’s Lawyers Say She Had A Secret Stitch ‘N’ Bitch With Pope Francis

OH GODDAMMIT, IF TRUE. Good, decent people in America are trying really hard to think the best of this new commie pope, who seems to be trying to take the focus off hot button wingnut issues to return the...
The gay Nazis are coming for all your moneys!

Open Enrollment For Gay Reparations Beginning Soon, According To Anonymous Moron

We're guessing this one has only a thin hope of joining ACORN and Jade Helm 15 in the Great Big Catalogue of Rightwing Fears, but let's document the specimen just in case it manages to thrive. Over at Gateway Pundit,...

NYC Mayor Bill De Blasio Does The Pot Like A Common Jazz Criminal, And The NYPD Is On It

Thanks to the NYPD's recent unofficial work stoppage, it's a great time to be a public urinator in New York. Loiterers are going shockingly unticketed and jaywalkers are free to ply their trade with impunity. There is, however, one...
This is a man who knows about conspiracies

BREAKING: Jesse Ventura Wrong About Nazi Water Fluoridation

Of the many things that you may have been worried about this week, the good fact-checkers at Politifact would like to free you of one possible source of anxiety: No, the practice of water fluoridation did not begin in...
Won't someone speak out against this sort of thing?

Arizona GOP Will Murder All Early Voting, Unless It Is With Mitt Romney

A couple days ago, we brought you the story of a completely fabricated wingnut outrage over a Latino man supposedly "caught" on video as he "stuffed a ballot box" in Arizona's August primary. Except he wasn't frauding anything at all. The...
Since this photo doesn't exist, maybe YOU DON'T EITHER! Whoa, we are all Philip K Dick today!

New Wingnut Theory (Or ‘Satire’?): Michelle Obama Never Birthed No Babies

From the ugly world of Facebook, we received a recommendation to check out this story: "Evidence Emerges That Michelle Obama Never Birthed Malia And Sasha," at something called "The U.S. Patriot," whose "About" page assures us that they are...

Intelligence Community Cracking Down On Leaks About Weaponized Armored Dolphin Soldiers Probably

Fox News has uncovered chilling evidence that Bamz is running the least transparent, most fascist administration EVAH. America’s top spy, or department head, James Clapper has attacked freedom, by writing a strongly worded memo addressed to employees of the...

Cory Booker Refuses To Douse Hopes That Everyone Can Sleep With Him Maybe

OMG you guys, did you hear that Cory Booker might be gay? Well, actually, what he said was that he wasn't necessarily ruling out the possibility that he may or may not be gay, or straight, or something! In...

Panty-Related Rumor Roils County Prosecutor Race In Ohio

We feel just awful for Hocking County, Ohio, prosecutor Laina Fetherolf, a first-term Democrat whose campaign for reelection has been complicated by vicious rumors that sound like something out of an episode of Night Court. And we really feel...