Tag: ross douthat

Everybody Hates Trump, Even Though He Made BIG BOMBS GO BOOM. Loser!

But Donald Trump thought doing bombs would make him presidential. :(

Ross Douthat Will Fuck You All Night Long, With His Throbbing Neckbeard

Oh yeah baby that is right, can he call you Chunky Reese Witherspoon?
And we're going to reclaim 'Tea Party' for girls, dammit

Let’s Take A Breather And Treat Ourselves To The Whimsical Stylings Of Maureen Dowd, Oh Sweet Jesus

Maureen Dowd ate another pot brownie and had a fever sex dream about Elizabeth Warren and Hillary Clinton. It was a very stupid fever sex dream.

Please Enjoy The Slow But Steady Unraveling Of David Brooks

We've been eagerly covering the complete mental disintegration of not one, but two, esteemed columnists at the paper of record lately. Both David Brooks, America's least intellectual public intellectual, and Ross Douthat, a freshman term paper on Opus Dei...

Ross Douthat Hopes GOP Convention Will Save GOP From Terrifying Trump Monster

Oh god, what must it be like to be a self-styled moderate Republican writing for the New York Times right now? In another era, you'd have been to the manor born, but instead you are required to bang out...

Donald Trump, Donald Trump, Donald Trump: Your Weekly Top Ten. (Donald Trump!)

Whoa hey, what's shakin' my Wonkerinos? Yes, it is I, who is called "Evan," and I am here with your Weekly Top Ten reading list. Was your top ten so lonelypants while I was on vacation? You betcha. I'd...

Republicans SO MAD They Made Trump Happen

So Donald Trump had a pretty super Super Tuesday, huh? What with all of that winning he did, from hippy-dippy socialist Vermont and only-slightly-less liberal Taxachusetts, to the deep red down-there regions of the Confederate states of AmeriKKKa. He let Ted...

Ross Douthat Knows Donald Trump Is Totally Obama’s Fault

It has brought us no end of joy to watch the GOP try to run away from Donald Trump, pretending that particular monster is not the fruit of their own racist, sexist, and rage-filled loins. (Ewww. We just grossed ourselves...

Maureen Dowd Is High Again

Oh dear. It seems New York Times columnist and comedienne has overdosed on candy again, and, in a marijuana-fueled rage, has typed another mud puddle of words on her favorite subject in all the land, Madam You-Know-Who: After running as a...

Good Job, Everyone! 2014 Was The Hottest Year Ever, And It’s All Our Fault

We set a new record in 2014, heating our oceans and destroying this one and only planet we live on, but it's OK because some "scientist" somewhere says it's a hoax and God will take care of it anyway....
You shut up, and you shut up, and you shut up

If We Could Quarantine Stupid, New Jersey Wouldn’t Have A Governor

When it comes to Ebola, there's what the experts say -- no, travel bans won't work; no, we should not quarantine everyone who sneezes on a subway; no, you can't get Ebola by looking at a picture of President...
Holy nightmare fuel, Batman!

Sunday Bloody NYT Sunday: Special Tom Friedman Rented ‘Batman’ Edition

Most of the news today is predictably awful, so we will just skim it, thank you. Good god, you people aren't actually relying on Yr Wonkette to be informed, are you? It looks like the government of...
This child can't stand Maureen Dowd either

Sunday Bloody NYT Sunday: Special Maureen Dowd Gets Pot Lessons From Willie Nelson Edition

With no single national calamity to focus on this week, the Sunday New York Times brings us mélange of Big Journalism on Important Topics, the general drift of which leads us to wish we'd stayed in bed. For starters,...
In this alternate universe, the Sunday NYT has a comics section

Sunday Bloody NYT Sunday: Kinetic Action, Dead Saints, And Less ISIS Than You Might Think

Good morning, ye Wonkers! Today's top story is that Yr Doktor Zoom is once again breathing through both nostrils. You may have thought that ISIS or Syria or sportsball scandals or something was big, but that is merely because...
The best way to read your Sunday NYT

Sunday Bloody NYT Sunday: Child Labor’s Still Pretty Cool For Tobacco Growers

We depend on our Sunday New York Times for in-depth reporting on stuff that we may or may not care about, and on a good day we might even learn about something we had no idea we should have...
Fred Stein, 'Children reading newspaper' 1936

At The New York Times, A Slow News Day

Things have quieted down in Ferguson and we have a holiday weekend, so the New York Times is full of analysis-type stuff today. There's a pretty good piece on Democrats' attempts to mobilize African-American voters who are outraged over...