ron paul

Does Dr. Professor Congressman Ron Paul count as one of our “pantheon of fallen heroes”? No, because he has chosen to leave Congress voluntarily, which means that he is Undefeated, forever. The fact that he is using his God/Constitution-granted Liberty to walk away from Congress has probably gotten him thinking, though, thinking about how Liberty […]

Greetings, Wonketteers! Your Comics Curmudgeon has been given permission by Wonkette’s lovely editrix to promote a pet project here: Hail to the Slash, a crowdsourced repository of slash fiction about presidents and presidential candidates, having sex, with each other and other historical figures! Wonkette is made up of EXACTLY the sort of pervert politics nerds […]

Sorry you can’t be president Ron Paul! Also, sorry you didn’t win enough states (any states, the Virgin Islands is not a state) and thus couldn’t secure a speaking slot at the Republican National Convention! Also also, sorry they treated your delegates all mean and changed the delegate rules so you and people like you […]

Remember when we told you about all of those “factions” that the GOP has created and is now desperately trying to control and is whining about to the New York typists? Some of them, as it turns out, are easier to control than others. Like Ron Paul fans, who will not be placated because Ryan […]

Let’s say you want to be a member of the Iowa Senate, but you decide that actually running for the seat is expensive and tedious, and you realize that even if you win, you’re mostly going to be voting on a lot of boring local issues, probably involving corn. Wouldn’t it be more fun to […]

Quick, let’s brainstorm about the dumbest, most irrelevant data point with which we could attempt to analyze this presidential election! And while you’re shouting answers at your computer machines, know that nothing you suggest could be as colossally moronic as this: “At CafePress…we have been tracking 2012 election presidential candidate support via The Meter graph.” […]

Yesterday, we learned that noted constitutional scholar Ron Paul accepts and cashes his Social Security check even though it is “unconstitutional.” He did not say why, exactly, Social Security is unconstitutional (although Your Wonkette suspects it has something to do with his poor grasp of a common law system), and so it remains one in a […]

As foretold in Revelation, Lord of Lunatics Rick Santorum has warned that he is fortifying his followers for some kind of world-ending battle to fend off the interloping Paultard hordes at the Republican National Convention in Florida, in August. It will be sweaty. “I’m concerned that Ron Paul and some of his supporters out there […]

Well, tragedy has struck in Ron Paul’s kingdom. Rand Paul endorsed Mitt Romney Thursday night on Sean Hannity’s show, presumably because he has been promised some high-profile position in Mitt’s Barbie and Ken’s Dream House™ cabinet. While those pioneering philosophers over at the Washington Post seriously ponder “what” Rand Paul’s endorsement “means” (absolute f#*&-all), other, […]

Hello and welcome to the latest episode of Extreme Delegate Apportionment brought to you by America’s disgruntled old Paultard contingent. These political bloodsport fanatics spent the weekend screaming and flinging themselves about at the Louisiana GOP’s state convention after party leaders sought to thwart the Paultards’ hostile convention takeover and RNC delegate pilfering scheme. (This […]

Americans Elect, the organization that tried to get America to nominate a centrist third-party candidate using the futuristic World Wide Web, has basically admitted defeat. Yes, in America, an idiot can become president, but a well-meaning yet mysterious group of people who took the time to actually get on the ballot in 27 states cannot […]

American democracy’s most persistent old fart Ron Paul has announced that he no longer cares for democracy per se in the traditional sense of trying to “win votes” from “voters,” because this is a hard thing to do, when your platform is mostly insane. “We will no longer spend resources campaigning in primaries in states […]

Isn’t it great how Election Season brings out the best in all of us, making us ever delight in doing more and better for our fellow man? (And womyn, ladies!) Also, isn’t it terrific how Election Season makes us all very very smart and intelligent? USA! Well, we have another winner in the newest let’s-all-murder-one-another-for-democracy […]

Flaccid Mitt Romney was out in Howard, Wisconsin to tell more crappy jokes to old people today when who interrupts him but a supporter of Doctor Congressman Ron Paul, a man who ran for president in 2011. He kept hollerin at Romney about the Mormon religion’s attitudes regarding black people, and black people who spawn […]

A chilling new report from Citizens for Responsibility and Ethics in Washington shows that this member of Congress’s campaign committee and PAC paid out a total of $304,599 in salaries and $48,742 for services during the 2008 and 2010 election cycles to his daughter, daughter’s mother-in-law, brother, grandson, granddaughter [*PAUSES FOR BREATH*] another granddaughter and […]