Silly Paultards, The Great War Is Over
Tuesday, June 16th, 2009
It’s December, 2007 all over again! Out of nowhere come the Paultards, today, wanting more War. MORE »
It’s December, 2007 all over again! Out of nowhere come the Paultards, today, wanting more War. MORE »
We’re a day late to this one and have no time for long, meandering first paragraphs about nothing. Here’s the deal: The Politico has written a pornographic feature about how it wants to fuck Peter Orszag, Grover Norquist, Christopher Hitchens, Chuck Todd, Rahm Emanuel, Eric Cantor, and Dr. Congressman Ron Paul, in that order, maybe. MORE »
Reader “Emily” sends us this mysterious photo from Chicago, which appears to be a Paultard car, only without the R at the beginning of Dr. Paul’s famous slogan. “I still really couldn’t believe this was a thing,” she writes. So, question: IS THIS A THING?
Wonkette’s secret Eastern European money-laundering operative “Adam” sends this photo and writes: “Hey, I was in Poland last week traveling and I came across this ad. For real, is that the Doc Paul? Is he creating a freedom revolution FOR POLISH EYEGLASSES!!????” The answer is no. That is clearly Magneto, maybe.
America’s favorite doctor, Ron Paul, is struggling with demons we cannot even begin to comprehend. Here he is whining to an empty House of Representatives last night, about the night terrors he suffers and the horrifying intrusion of interdimensional orcs into his waking life. [YouTube]
Mean old fartsack Lindsey Graham spoke at the “South Carolina GOP Convention” this weekend and made an enemy of RON PAUL and his supporters, the Paultards, by denouncing libertarianism and Liberty. And then he told everyone to leave, because Jim DeMint was about to shoot a firecracker out of his ass. MORE »
We’ve already set aside several boxes of popcorn for one of 2010’s most anticipated comedy stories, when idiot Kentucky Sen. Jim Bunning will make a fool of himself daily in the process of losing his Senate seat. And now the hilarity might start even sooner, because Ron Paul’s child, Rand (”The Son”), might primary Bunning. Rand Paul has the exact same views as his father, so it should take about two minutes of money supply babble before Bunning gets uncomfy and calls Rand a faggot. [CNN]
Okay this explains basically everything written on Wonkette for the past few months. Ron Paul is getting himself a little following among his colleagues on the Hill, see? He’s been throwing fancy weekly luncheons for a dozen-ish of his minions to discuss the exciting lunch-hour topic of Austrian economic theory (laissez faire/sound money/central bank causes inflation/FREEDOM!). And who, who is his prized pupil? Michele Bachmann! Ron Paul loves her because she’s a good studier! OH MY. MORE »
Hello, Chuckles! So, uhm … SOCIALISTS! Yes, they are always plotting against you (us). Anyway, Ron Paul was around in 1976! He did whatever, or not, and, next thing you know, people died, or did not, but still!
Impossibly enough, this post isn’t about teabag protests but is about Ron Paul. That’s right, you guessed it, it is instead about whether Congress should distribute “letters of marque and reprisal” to stop pirates and stuff. This is one of those old-timey things that, to people in 1789, was a pretty clutch inclusion in the Constitution — kind of like assigning an accurate fractional electoral value to slaves. Ron Paul wants Congress to start using this power to send forth Privateers to the high seas. Back in the halcyon days of Mercantilism, the king or queen or dauphin would send private aristocratic warships out to sea to steal other countries’ ships and their booty, for Royal Profit. Sometimes those victimized countries would get so upset that they might retaliate with, say, A SPANISH ARMADA. This is all Ron Paul wants now, and that’s why he can’t have it. [TPM]

Look at this magical furry version of Ron Paul at the Boston teabagging parade! Listen to this incredible live radio Tea Party while you browse the Internets! Wow wow wow! Photo by Garrett M. Quinn.