Texans Want To Secede From Union, Name George W. Bush Their Texas President
Wednesday, November 26th, 2008
Mysterious Wonkette Texas operative “The Doctor” (RP?) has forwarded us a delightful e-mail (s)he received this morning, probably from a great aunt or uncle, that thoroughly explains how Texas has the resources it needs to secede from the Union, which it should do immediately, “since B. Hussein Obama won the election.” Silly sheeple, only now they get it; the Paultards have been lobbying for this since January or August or whenever it was that Ron Paul stopped running. *FACEPALM* MORE »
Mysterious Wonkette Texas operative “The Doctor” (RP?) has forwarded us a delightful e-mail (s)he received this morning, probably from a great aunt or uncle, that thoroughly explains how Texas has the resources it needs to secede from the Union, which it should do immediately, “since B. Hussein Obama won the election.” Silly sheeple, only now they get it; the Paultards have been lobbying for this since January or August or whenever it was that Ron Paul stopped running. *FACEPALM* MORE »








Hello people of the Western States. To keep things “pure,” your editor has not read the previous liveblogs, so this whole song-and-dance will be new. We missed John McCain on the Larry King Show,, too. But we saw Ron Paul on Rachel Maddow’s show! Let’s see what’s going on, and try to justify this weird three-zone liveblogging.
Here’s your favorite Ashley Todd, the little smiling hobbit down there with her pals and her first hero, the Doctor Congressman Ron Paul, with Cowboy Jesus looking on in the background. Ashley’s not a “Real Paultard,” as she decided to root for another candidate after Ron Paul lost miserably. This hypocrisy is considered rather uncouth by the Paultard Council. But she was with the Paultards long enough to learn how to act like a fucking idiot, and this is how we should remember her. We decided the occasion called for a touch of sepia, beg yr pardon.
The rich ladies of D.C. (and Northern Virginia) used to have fancy wine parties where they would buy fancy kitchen crap or $500 dildos or whatever, but now there is no money, for anything. This is why the fancy white women are now having “gold parties,” at which they sell whatever golden trinkets they can find in their monstrous foreclosed McMansions. “Suzy Senkus brought a bracelet given to her once upon a time by a handsome doctor, who then cheated on her with a nurse.” What a trashy nation. [
The State of Texas says you must file to be on the presidential ballot 70 days before the election, and both Barack Obama and John McCain allegedly missed the deadline, so now whackadoodle Libertarian Bob Barr will be President of Texas while the rest of the nation has to make do with the geezer or the other guy.
Ron Paul’s very special press conference has ended and, we regret to inform, it featured no