ron paul

Hope you had a great work week and are heading to Happytown for the weekend! Hooray! Enjoy our tales of OJ Simpson, DJ Tanner, Carmen Electra, some motorcycle dude, Stephen Colbert, Ron Paul, and more! It’s a big ol’ party in today’s Happy Links. The OJ Simpson copter chase pilots love each other now, and […]

Clocking in at around 645,000 words, Atlas Shrugged is Ayn Rand’s magnum derpus. So it makes sense that the film version has been stretched out into three full-length movies, because how else are you going to cram all that Objectivist TRUTH into the hollow skulls of the American sheeple? The first movie actually starred Taylor […]

The Great Big Freedom to Never Pay Grazing Fees Revolution continues to bubble right along, although the Bureau of Land Management released Cliven Bundy’s cheerfully-trespassing cattle and has backed off from its plans to seize them. Still, there are rumblings in the Wingnuttosphere that this is far from over, because for one thing Bundy still […]

Because we are a Happy Nice Time blog not a Geopolitical Feelings blog, we don’t talk a ton about Russia, even though we’ve learned that Edward Snowden thinks they are super awesome on human rights and Ron Paul lurrrvvees them. We will, however, succumb to Russia-talking if it involves Jimmy Fallon as Vladimir Putin. READ […]

Sorry, were you feeling left out because we told you that Cathy McMorris Rodgers was America’s New Sweetheart, but your sweetheart tastes do not run towards ladies, thankyewverymuch? Never fear. We are all-inclusive in our sweetheart finding and loving and praising here at Wonkette, and we have found you a delightful male counterpart to Chatty […]

Duuuuuudes. Welcome to another edition of Derp Roundup, the (*koff!*) weekly feature where we roll up whatever seeds and stems are left from stories that weren’t quite compelling enough to make a full post, but too stoopid to ignore altogether, and then we, uhhhh… hahahahahaha Yeah, we totally do, man. Our first story probably could […]

If you know us at all, you know what big fans we are of Sarah Palin. Her folksiness speaks to us. She’s just so down home, which is what we love in a Fox News personality/ex-politician/scam artist. You also likely know that we are really really big believers in the gold standard because of our […]

Have you been wishing for an unholy trinity of Ron Paul’s abolish the Federal Reserve nuttiness and Rick Perry’s zeal to eliminate cabinet-level departments and, best of all, a threat of “civil uprising” against the government? You are in luck, people, because a couple of retired generals — Army Gen. Paul E. Vallely and Air […]

Hey, kids, here’s a big surprise! Ron Paul thinks it’s high time for patriots to stop letting the federal government push them around, what with its “laws” and “healthcare mandate” and all that. What’s more, he thinks that there’s really no longer any reason to wait to start watering the ol’ Tree of Liberty with […]

Ron Paul is scheduled to be the keynote speaker for a Sept. 11 conference sponsored by The Fatima Center, a rightwing “radical traditionalist” Catholic group that the Southern Poverty Law Center calls “perhaps the single largest group of hard-core anti-Semites in North America.” But that doesn’t mean that Ron Paul is an anti-Semite, after all. […]

Libertarian yard leprechaun Ron Paul retired from Congress in January after three attempts at the presidency and exactly one bill passed of the 464 he sponsored in the House. Many who noticed his vacancy wondered, how could this void possibly be filled? Not to worry anti-statist-states-righters! Ron Paul has gotten himself an internet channel and […]

Writing a stupid comment is easy. Writing an epically stupid comment, on the other hand, takes something a little extra, a little special, a little hamsterfucking insane. We think we have found such a winner in our slushpile, kids. In response to Thursday’s story about homophobic sleazehead Tony Perkins being a big lying liar who […]

After years of lurking in the shadows of his father’s success, Rand Paul has hired a racist, possibly anti-Semitic staffer to wrangle future Rand-tards using the power of the interwebs and help him assemble his own cadre of misguided white people. There is no way that this will end poorly, and soon it will be […]

In big fat “can we just got on with this now” marijuana news, members of Congress introduced a bill this week to legalize pot on the federal level, and tax and regulate it like alcohol. Congressmen Jared Polis (D-Rocky Mtn High CO) and Earl Blumenauer (D-It’s fucking raining all the time what do you expect […]

What’s up, “William Hilton Paul,” if that even is your real name? (What, “Ramada” was taken?) Oh, you just got hauled off from the airport to the pokey for being too rad? Let us examine, together, your charges: When the plane landed about 10:49 a.m., Paul was charged with consuming beer/wine underage, disorderly conduct and […]