Mitt to Beg Voters to Overlook His Scary and Confusing Religion
Thursday, October 4th, 2007
28% of Americans refuse to vote for a Mormon, which poses a problem for Mormon presidential candidate Mitt Romney. Because unlike black people or New Yorkers or any number of the other groups of people who won’t vote for Mitt, most of those 28% are probably Republicans. And Mitt gets harassed about his nutty beliefs and magic pajamas by yahoos like us everywhere he goes, when he’d much, much rather talk about how none of his sons are gays and how we need to save all the stem cells from Osama bin Pelosi. MORE »
28% of Americans refuse to vote for a Mormon, which poses a problem for Mormon presidential candidate Mitt Romney. Because unlike black people or New Yorkers or any number of the other groups of people who won’t vote for Mitt, most of those 28% are probably Republicans. And Mitt gets harassed about his nutty beliefs and magic pajamas by yahoos like us everywhere he goes, when he’d much, much rather talk about how none of his sons are gays and how we need to save all the stem cells from Osama bin Pelosi. MORE »
Robert Novak’s “important neutral Republican” sources all hate Hollywood Freddie Thompson because the famous movie star did not hire them or ask for their help when starting his campaign to be our TV president. So they have all 
Eyewitness report sent by a high-ranking Wonkette Operative this morning:
Today’s column from conservative has-been Robert Novak details the epic war of words being waged between conservative has-been Tom DeLay and conservative has-been Newt Gingrich. 
It’s a new year in Wonk’d but all the famous-for-dc cats have already broken their resolutions. Laura Bush only made it 3 days before she was back on the sauce, Robert Novak may have been at the happiest place on Earth, but he was still an asshole, and of course there’s Katherine Harris, as you can see, taking to the streets of Florida during the warmest winter ever, in an ankle length fur coat. You get these dandies plus a Member of Congress who loves to stare at members of men, after you unzip.
It can’t be easy to outrage Tom DeLay’s staff. We have known some of The Hammer’s people, and they’re generally vindictive sleazebag thugs. They even stood out on the Hill. What would it take to make them all quit and stomp off to sulk at Starbucks?
New York, LA, New York, LA — no one gives a shit about DC until their tangentially-related-to-public-service movie has to premiere, then all of a sudden Cleveland Park is where it’s at. At least a solid Demi Moore sighting came out of the screening of The Guardian last week, but she’s not even in it. And while Demi is gone already, some people just never leave, as evidenced by the above photo of (the back of) Tom DeLay duck-walking down H St. Others that were Wonk’d this week: Marion Barry needs his ride pimped, Harriet Miers shops for pimp threads, and the prince of darkness is overheard on his cell phone asking, “Is Bob Novak gonna have to choke a bitch?” All these and your third favorite Ghostbuster, after the jump.