Wonkette

This Draper cat is our new journalistic hero. While we were all sitting around in late August typing out “Oh who is Barack Obama going to pick for his Veep, and how does one assemble this complicated Ikea cabinet” on our elitist Macs he was in SOMALIA, trying not to get KIDNAPPED. He is basically your modern-day Indiana Jones, studied in the obscure traditions and quaintly superstitious folkways of an ancient band of bullet-headed goons and moose hunters called “Republicans.” Let’s learn how he infiltrated their tribe and got them to reveal all their embarrassing secrets! MORE »

You may all remember Robert Draper for his insanely long NYT article about the reverse-cowgirl firing squad that is the McCain campaign, or that book he wrote a couple years ago about George Bush being a turd. Whatever. There is news! He is a blogger now! And his blog has even more fantastical goodies about how John McCain has forced Sarah Palin to ride on the roof of the Straight Talk Express along with Mitt Romney’s dog. MORE »

…And/or NOT! Yes, that fancy hyped New York Times Magazine piece about the internals of the McCain campaign is now available online, because of YOU, Wonkette readers, who spammed the shit out of Bill Kristol’s Weekly Standard inbox yesterday. Good work. Unfortunately, the piece is kind of bleh, with not nearly as much sexy “late Hillary Clinton campaign”-style adviser-on-adviser slap fights. The overall message, which you may have predicted, is that WALNUTS! is not as good of a politician as Barack Obama, ergo the current “losing” situation in which he finds himself deeply embedded. Nevertheless, let’s run through some highlights. MORE »

Be sure to check your liberal New York Times Magazine this week, as star reporter Robert Draper has put together “an explosive story… on the inner workings and combative personalities of what has been a wild few months for the McCain campaign,” according to the Huffington Post’s Sam Stein. You can read his preview here, but be warned, that Sam Stein is a major tease! He says there are all sorts of “juicy nuggets,” so presumably he’s read an advance copy and is being mean and won’t share. BOOOOO! We want the story NOW. Who at the New York Times can leak this? Hmm… oh, ha, obviously Bill Kristol can leak it! Everyone seriously e-mail Bill Kristol immediately, subject line, “E-MAIL ME THE BIG MCCAIN STORY RIGHT NOW, SWINE” and nothing else. It’ll work. Go. NOW. [HuffPo]

• Names & Faces: Al Gore on An Inconvenient Truth: “The production schedule was so grueling, I told the producers they should have called it ‘Kill Al Volume 1.’” [Life via WP]

• Heard on the Hill: Rep. Katherine Harris’s latest shoeless incident also involved a car wreck… A television ad for Rep. Deborah Pryce (R-OH) misspelled Pryce’s name. [Roll Call]
• Lloyd Grove’s Lowdown: Sen. Ted Kennedy says that Al Gore is keeping his options open with respect to a presidential bid, describes Sen. Hillary Clinton as “an extremely significant contender,” and expresses pride in his son, Rep. Patrick Kennedy (D-RI). [NYDN]
• Liz Smith: Did Roger Ailes have advance notice of the attack on Abu Musab Al-Zarqawi? [NYP]
• Washington Whispers: Journalist Robert Draper is working on a biography of George W. Bush, due out next year… Dave Matthews likes to read the Nation, which “seems kind of moderate” to him. [USNWR]