The RNC is considering making all Republican politicians take a ten-question Ronald Reagan-themed purity test! According to Daily Intel, “If someone disagrees with three or more of the policies, the resolution’s supporters want to withhold party money and endorsement. The 80 percent threshold comes from a famous Reagan quote: ‘The person who agrees with you 80 percent of the time is a friend and an ally — not a 20 percent traitor.’” Valid, but: Couldn’t Michael Steele have also, in theory, said those words in that order? So it’s unfair to call it a “Reagan” quote when, technically speaking, it’s potentially a Michael Steele quote. See, here’s your credit baby! Anyway, let’s play Michael Steele’s new politics quiz game, right now! MORE »

Whenever absolutely anything goes wrong, immediately fire the nearest communications director. This is a law, in our politics. It would follow, then, that Michael Steele would have already gone through all the communications directors on Earth, multiple times. Well! This recent RNC communications director, Trevor Francis, had only been at his job since March but lasted til yesterday, when Steele fired him to death because Steele was sad he, Michael Steele, did not receive “enough credit for the GOP’s electoral success earlier this month.” MORE »

Here’s the RNC’s fancy new web ad arguing that Ben Nelson or any other moderate Democrats would be hypocrites if they didn’t filibuster a motion to proceed on a health care bill. They claim that this would be akin to John Kerry’s famous “for it before I was against it” line on Iraq funding in 2004, which is wrong, although John Kerry is still terrible at speaking. But! We do appreciate the RNC’s production here, for the first time ever. The menacing, twitching figures, the repetition, the gritty industrial vibe. Too bad no one will ever see it. [Washington Independent]

In an effort to reduce its carbon footprint, the REPUBLICAN NATIONAL COMMITTEE has pledged to recycle smear campaigns and political spin! Yes, MICHAEL STEELE has finally done it! He’s bringing back all your favorites: “flip-flopper” … WILLIE HORTON … “cut and run” … “Why did the Democrats flip-flop and let Willie Horton cut and run?” This is an important question Michael Steele will inevitably ask in the days to come. MORE »

Michael Steele was so enraged by RNC Chairman Michael Steele’s original endorsement of Scuzzlebutt, the Maoist “moderate Republican” candidate in the NY-23 special election, that he has killed that Michael Steele and invented a new Michael Steele to dress up and run around on television as. This Michael Steele despises any semblance of moderation and promises to go Stalin on those moderate motherfuckers he’d already selected to run in various 2010 races. Moo moo, baby, motherfuckin’ cow on the tracks, can’t catch me, I’m on fire… MORE »

Oh look: Michael Steele went on Lawrence O’Donnell’s Try To Make Everyone Laugh Using Just Your Clothing show. Lawrence O’Donnell’s like, “Michael Steele, on a scale from total failure to total failure, how would you rate your involvement in the NY-23 race?” Michael Steele, gloating and beaming as if his mouth has never met the words coming out of it, basically responds that it’s not like winning political races is a skill you can just study and perfect. But ho ho, sure Mr. Guy, you just yell if it makes you feel better about your own insecurities, an offering which Lawrence O’Donnell readily accepts. [TPM]

Okay you guys, Michael Steele has been doing some Googling. No one panic. It’s just that, well, you’ve probably already heard about her, but… this Olympia Snowe lady? “I say, Welcome. Welcome. Each member of this party has a unique footprint. And it’s different from region to region. I can’t win in the Northeast with a candidate best suited for the South and vice-versa,” he said on teevee this morning, during which he disagreed with Tim Pawlenty’s criticism of Snowe’s liberal-ish proclivities. Oh but so anyway, because it is Michael Steele, his current M.O. is of course diametrically opposed to his public stance on this exact issue from ten months ago. MORE »

Sure, you can’t prevent any old dingbat from loading a “fan foto” to your Facebook fan page. But my oh my, what fans the RNC has! [Raw Story]

Looks like the RNC is still trying to give this “Internet” thing a go: “With an ever-increasing number of Czar appointments by President Obama, it has become clear that no position is too absurd. In an effort to assist in adding another cumbersome bureaucratic layer to government and to help properly ensure the basic human right of friendship to all Americans, a new Friendship Fairness Czar has recently been appointed. Tasked with the daunting responsibility of making sure that every Facebook user is equal, this new Czar will help redistribute the wealth of friendship from those who are too popular to those who are poor in friends.” Ha ha because Facebook friends are like “grocery money,” essentially! [GOP.com]

Michael Steele you have got to stop it with the funny today, we can’t take much more. NO NO DON’T GO ON TV! Oh no he’s going to say something too hilarious! Uh oh: “It’s a new platform for us. It’s not even really a web site.” No! A website is *exactly* what it is! This is too much. Let’s read some arbitrary news outlet to get away from all this, it doesn’t matter which… ah, New York Daily News, as good a choice as any, let’s see what’s in the ollll’ NYDN… “GOP Posts Password, Admin Instructions on New Web Site.” GAHH. [TPM, NYDN]

• WHO’S MAKING FUN OF WHAT NOW? “The RNC’s big relaunch of its website has not gone so well today. In the last hour or so, the site has been crashing periodically. The Obama campaign’s former online guru, Joe Rospars, tells TPMDC: ‘You know your web program is in trouble when your site can’t even handle the traffic bump from people making fun of your web program.’” [TPM]