rick sanchez

When we last heard from World’s Dumbest Anchorman Rick Sanchez, he had gotten fired from CNN for blowing the lid off of the global Jewish conspiracy and so had nothing better to do than to do some light content aggregation on HuffPo and pay some poor publicist to send out email blasts about it. Since […]

One day you’re bringing home six figures from CNN, the next day you’re unemployed and apologizing to the fucking Jews and trying to figure out how to get paid from Twitter. That is the complete Wikipedia entry for Rick Sanchez, the dumbest anchorman since Ron Burgundy. And now, for reasons we cannot even begin to […]

Did you know Rick Sanchez is currently saving the people of Egypt from dictatorship, with the journalism and the social media? He is! If you are aware of any Egyptians who are in trouble, let Rick know, ok? He will send it out to his wider audience: his kids and his dog. And he has […]

BREAKING WONKETTE EXCLUSIVE: Rick Sanchez has gotten up from the couch, brushed off the Cheeto dust, and duct-taped his laptop to his teevee. This changes everything. [Twitter]

Good for the both of them. Then Rick Sanchez rolled back onto the pile of Cheeto bags and Franzia boxes on which he had been sleeping. [Twitter]

Rick Sanchez may be unemployed because of some stuff he said about the Jews, but that doesn’t mean he has quit. Sanchez is still active, occasionally doing interviews and sitting by the phone for one of the cable news channels that are run by fewer Jews than CNN to ask him to bring his trademark […]

Professional idiot Rick Sanchez has finally released a statement about those things he said about the Jews last week on a satellite radio show, and it turns out he is a bit sorry for saying those things that got him fired! “Despite what my tired and mangled words may have implied, they were never intended […]

CNN, the once-influential news channel that for the past several years employed a mouth-breathing fool as its main daytime news reader, has finally fired this mouth-breathing fool. Was Rick Sanchez let go because he is an insult to the intelligence of anyone smart enough to operate a teevee remote? No, he was fired for saying […]

According to CNN’s Rick Sanchez, Rick Sanchez is not an idiot, he merely came from a working class family. And that’s why Rick Sanchez hates Jon Stewart: Jon Stewart is “bigoted” against him. And Jews like Jon Stewart “run” CNN and “all the other networks,” so Jews aren’t allowed to be a minority. Makes sense! […]

Ha ha, so a couple of your Wonkette contributors were jabbering all day about doing liveblogging, and your editor said okay great but don’t kill yourselves because these “couple of primary/runoff things somewhere” do not exactly leave the nation or even the Wonkette Readership spellbound. And then of course nobody showed up to liveblog at […]

White House press secretary Robert Gibbs apologized to Shirley Sherrod “on behalf of this entire administration” in his daily briefing, which Sherrod “watched live on CNN.” Gibbs said Vilsack is “trying to reach her” to talk and apologize to her. Sherrod, like a true champ, said the administration has her phone number and knows how […]

Rick Sanchez is so stupid that other teevee anchor people are embarrassed for him. Here’s CNN’s most comical idiot saying that Iceland is “too cold” for volcanic eruptions, because of course volcanoes depend upon the surface air temperature to heat the lava and ash deep below the Earth’s crust. That’s why “long words” like Hawaii […]

After an exhaustive review process, your Wonkette proudly recommends CNN for the best “Hawaii coverage.” They know most things about Math. [YouTube, YouTube]

In today’s long-awaited “Tuesday Fun Video,” Mexican CNN anchor Rick Sanchez plays Mexican music over footage of a massive iceberg collapsing into the ocean, near Greenland, just to put on a show for tourists. While you Science-pansies out there may whine, “Wah wah global warming wah wah wah,” just like that, your Wonkette sees an […]

Robert Gibbs made a very special announcement today about the communist plantation, Cuba! You can now travel and send gifts and clothes there — if you’re a Cuban-American with family on the island, that is. (Although the liberal New York Times writes that there maybe be more easing on the way, which Obama may announce […]