rick perry

You guys all getting your Holiday Freak on yet? Dressing up in your leathers? Having your labes snipped? Gettin’ weird and freaky up in it, maybe with a dwarf, and a pizza? Well Rick Perry is, bitchez. Not only does the Texas governor want to top you, he wants the Messiah all up in his […]

Have you been wishing for an unholy trinity of Ron Paul’s abolish the Federal Reserve nuttiness and Rick Perry’s zeal to eliminate cabinet-level departments and, best of all, a threat of “civil uprising” against the government? You are in luck, people, because a couple of retired generals — Army Gen. Paul E. Vallely and Air […]

Well, that half-hearted celebration sure was premature. The 5th Circuit Court of Appeals has rescinded Monday’s federal ruling that had found part of Texas’s terrible abortion law unconstitutional, restoring restrictions that will have the effect of closing most of the state’s clinics. “This unanimous decision is a vindication of the careful deliberation by the Texas […]

A federal judge has ruled one part of Texas’s terrible abortion law unconstitutional and partially blocked another part. The worst provision, which required all doctors performing abortions to have admitting privileges within 30 miles of the clinic and would have effectively closed all but a handful of clinics in the state, was overruled by U.S. […]

Ted Nugent is bringing his political know-how to the contest for Texas Agriculture Commission, accepting the positions of co-chair and treasurer for former state Rep. Sid Miller. Nugent promises to “raise as much hell” as possible on Miller’s behalf, while his direct involvement in day-to-day management of the campaign is expected to consist of posing […]

There’s this guy in Texas called Dave Carney, and he is mean on the Twitter! Why do we care? Because Dave Carney is a top adviser to Texas Attorney General and probable GOP nominee for governor Greg Abbot, and was a top adviser to Rick Perry when he was running for president, and at other […]

Have you been following our super-incisive Syria coverage, including yr official Wonkette policy on Syria, which is ???????. Of course you have, because where else are you going to get this sort of hard-hitting news coverage? Up until now, though, we’ve been missing a critical bit of reportage on Syria, which is that ooga-booga End Times […]

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Oh hell yes. Coyote-shootin’, painkiller-gobblin’, can’t remember three things in a row master debater with the super awesome hair Governor from Texas Rick Perry emerged from his closet today to beg for Obamacare money because of how much he hates Obamacare money. But, hey man, a hundred million dollars is a hundred million dollars and […]

Have you guys heard that new joke making the rounds? It goes like this: what’s got two thumbs and doesn’t realize that racism is over everywhere except on the Democrat plantation, so he keeps stirring up racial resentments by persecuting poor innocent white folks and suggesting he won’t let states restrict individuals’ voting rights as […]

“With No Safety Oversight, Six Flags Will Investigate Roller Coaster Death Itself,” says a U.S. News headline that we totally could have written. Does it surprise you to learn that this death trap of an unregulated roller coaster is in Texas? No, of course it doesn’t. Does it surprise you that there are absolutely zero […]

Serious question, Wonkvilleins, because the conservative ladeez of “Politichicks” have put together a Conservative Men Swinging Dicks contest that for real includes Rush Limbaugh, Jonah Goldberg, Joseph Farah and Neil Cavuto, COME ON. (To be fair, those bloated piles of pig anus feature in subcategories like “New Media” and “Rush Limbaugh” and did not final.) […]

Katy Perry announced today that she will not seek re-election as Governor of Texas in 2014, but would not say for certain whether she plans a presidential bid in 2016. The three-term governor has held office since 2000, when then-Gov. Kate Bush became President. Her time in office has been marked by a controversial mix […]

See, we thought that maybe this was a fluke, and that there was nothing more that could possibly be said about the fierce derpery at work in this photo from the Texas Statehouse yesterday. But then we looked at the Twitter stream of the photographer, Seth Millstein, who’s been tweeting the dickens out of the […]

Man, it seems like just yesterday, and not a full week ago, that the Texas state legislature finished up its Very Special Session with a heroic butt-kicking of the Republican Party, said kicking having been led by one Wendy Davis, a hard-charging state senator who has overcome the crippling twin disabilities of single motherhood and […]