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Posts Tagged ‘richard nixon’

Piano Concerto No. 1, by Richard Milhous Nixon

Friday, September 7th, 2007


Here’s your Friday Musical Interlude, by everybody’s favorite president, Richard M. Nixon! This is after he lost to Kennedy (IT WAS RIGGED) and was reduced to making appearances on the Jack Paar show. And we have no idea why the sound turns off at the end of the clip, but it’s probably something to do with National Security.

Richard Nixon plays his Piano Concerto #1 [YouTube]


Meet G. Harrold Carswell, the Larry Craig of the 1970s Who Nearly Became a Supreme Court Justice!

Tuesday, September 4th, 2007

G. Harrold Carswell in the stalls - WonketteDid you know that even before the George Michael era, powerful Republican politicians were being arrested for Lewd Sex Crimes in public bathrooms? Did you know that America was briefly threatened by the probability of a Toilet Cruiser becoming a Supreme Court Justice? MORE »


Man Who Shot George Wallace Released From Prison In Time For 2008 Campaign

Thursday, August 23rd, 2007

Send THEM a Message: W A L L A C E - WonketteBack in the “good old days” of the early 1970s, America was torn apart by recession, gasoline rationing, race riots, the Vietnam war and segregation — which was still a big issue in places where blacks were especially hated, such as Alabama, where Democrat Governor George Wallace was bravely keeping the Negro children out of White schools despite the Supreme Court’s orders. Wallace was immensely popular with Democrats who hoped to keep their schools white, too. So it was a national tragedy when a libtard nut named Arthur Bremer shot Wallace at a Maryland campaign stop in May 1972. MORE »


Thursday, August 9th, 2007

Subject: get over it
From: Leonard & Joan Nixon
To: tips@wonkette.com
Why don’t you morons get over Richard Nixon. He’s dead you know. Put some of your blame on good ole boy, Bubba Clinton.


A Memo From Nixon

Monday, July 16th, 2007

'What the Christ is the matter with the Jews, Bob? ' - WonketteSay what you want about Nixon — he’s dead and can’t hurt us anymore, probably — but the guy could at least write a memo! Thanks to the federal government’s seizure of the Nixon Library, a whole bunch of new evidence is finally coming out of the vaults, so we can thrill to the literary stylings of Richard M. MORE »


No-Nonsense Straight-Talkin’ Prosecutor Nearly Fucked Up Watergate Hearings

Thursday, July 5th, 2007

That's Fred on the left. - WonketteFred Thompson was a simple down-home country lawyer back in the early 70s. Then, after he ran Senator Howard Baker’s successful ‘72 reelection campaign, Baker brought Thompson to Washington to serve as deputy counsel for the committee investigating Watergate. Fred proceeded to sabotage the committee’s investigation by leaking as much shit to Nixon’s lawyers as he could get away with. Then he bragged about it in his book! Thompson’s book, I Am Personally Responsible for Overthrowing Richard Nixon Even Though I Loved Him, hasn’t been read by anyone since he wrote it in 1975. The Boston Globe found a copy in the library and learned that Thompson admits to leaking the Senate’s discovery of Nixon’s White House audio taping system days before Thompson asked the famous question about them during a televised hearing. Thompson had no problem asking about the tapes, even though he loved Nixon, because a) it would put him on the TV, and b) he was positive the tapes would exonerate the drug-addled corrupt old bastard, because he’s a fucking imbecile.
Not all would put a heroic sheen on Thompson’s Watergate role [Globe]


Nixon Blamed For Poisoned China Crap

Thursday, June 28th, 2007

Only Nixon could go to China ... - WonketteEver since Dick Nixon “opened” China, Americans have been treated to an endless supply of cheap consumer goods that are much more affordable for unemployed people. Here’s the latest list of stuff that costs a little less as it kills you: MORE »


Happy 35th Anniversary, Watergate Burglary!

Monday, June 18th, 2007

GHWB was Deep Throat! - WonketteIt was 2:30 a.m. on a Saturday — June 17, 1972 — that five burglars were arrested at the Watergate offices of the DNC. Later that day, hippie Carl Bernstein was working on the story — but Republican naval intelligence spook and “rookie reporter” Bob Woodward was quickly assigned to “help.”

Let’s celebrate America’s Favorite Birthday, after the jump.

MORE »


Karl Rove’s Wacky College Pranks Set the Stage For His Wacky Adulthood Betrayal of the American Dream

Wednesday, May 2nd, 2007

Last month, we all laughed at long-haired nerdy little teenage MC Rove talking to Dan Rather in 1972 about how much he loved Richard Nixon. Of course, while we were laughing, Karl was fucking shit up. MORE »


McCain’s New Hire Loves Dogs

Friday, April 6th, 2007

WALNUTS! McCain’s campaign is an embarrassing mess — so who better to turn that mess around than a Jew-counting Nixonite? McCain recently brought on Fred Malek to be his national finance co-chair. Mr. Malek has a long, celebrated history in the GOP, from Nixon onwards, and he’s connected, of course, to the Bushes. MORE »


Kissinger Tapes Reveal We Are Still Living In 1972

Monday, April 2nd, 2007

Imagine a White House full of scheming backstabbing power-mad global criminals — you know, but not right now. Earlier, like from 1969 to 1974. That’s when the hilarious duo of Henry Kissinger and his meathead drunken buddy Richard Nixon were president.

Like our current crazy duo of Cheney & Dubya, “Jew Boy” and “Meatball Mind” broke hundreds of laws, murdered hundreds of thousands of people and basically tried their damnedest to destroy the United States of America. After the jump, read hilarious highlights from the just-released Kissinger tapes — turns out Kissinger was taping everybody’s phone calls, too!

MORE »