rich people
Rich People Do Not Give To Charity, Shocker
We will begin this post by asking you a variation of the thing we always ask you, which is: “does it surprise you that a disproportionate amount of rich people are dicks?” And of course it doesn’t, we’re used to it by now and have more or less adjusted to the new status quo of [...]
Communists At The Atlantic Blame America First
One of us! One of us! We never thought we’d see the day, but the Atlantic, fresh off a story kind of blaming workers for killing a company already in bankruptcy, has published a piece decrying the unfair distribution of American riches and arguing that Job Creators should maybe cough up some tip money so [...]
Civil Rights: Warlord Condi Rice & Some Plutocrat Finance Lady Allowed To Join Fancy Golf Club
Ahh, so now we know why lying war monster Condolleezza Rice was going around giving wingnut speeches about socialism and such-like. It wasn’t about getting on the presidential ticket — who even wants that? — it was about becoming the first female member of August National golf club, a goal that she attained today. She, [...]
Bummed About Your 15 Percent Tax Rate, Job Creators? Have You Considered Paying ‘Zero’ Instead?
It is with a heavy heart that we inform you that we have not significantly appeased our lords and masters the job creators and so they have taken to laundering their money, investing their money speech in offshore tax havens. Some of the world’s money launderers biggest banks, in fact, have been quietly helping 100,000 [...]
What’s In Your IRA? Don’t Worry, Mitt Romney Doesn’t Know Either
Oh HI, rapidly aging baby boomers! How is that retirement planning coming? From what we hear, not so hot! Perhaps if America’s baby boomers had been as smart as Mitt Romney and found a way to siphon $100,000,000 (ONE HUNDRED MILLION) into an IRA (individual retirement account to you young ones) in spite of strict [...]
Poor Rich People Lost 25 Percent Of Their Speech In 2009
Poor rich people! The IRS recently released its latest annual analysis of the tax returns from the 400 filers with the highest adjusted gross incomes, and looks like they had 29% less income speech in 2009 than in 2008. From CNN Money: The 400 tax filers at the top of the income scale hauled in [...]
Joe Biden Has Some Things To Yell At You, Rich People
What a busy few weeks it has been for VP Bitchen Camaro! There was Gentle Joe, singlehandedly making the world safe for gay love, and Scrappy Joe, singlehandedly making the world safe for little picked-on kids (with his fists!), and now there is Class War Joe, cold yellin’ at rich people like they are responsible [...]
Romney’s Rich Buddy Wants Hipsters To Be Investors Or Something, For America
One of the nice young men who does the Planet Money podcast on the NPR somehow lured Edward Conard, who you might remember as the guy who created a shell corporation that existed only to donate $1 million to Mitt Romney’s SuperPAC, out to a plebeian coffee shop to talk about rich people. As a [...]
Unteachable Mitt Romney Talks About His Owner Friends In Other Sports
A reporter asked Mitt Romney today where he thought free agent Peyton Manning should play football next season. Ahh, there’s a nice birthday softball question for ya! All he had to say was that he’s a Patriots fan, so he hopes Manning doesn’t play for a team in the same division. This is all he [...]
Science Proves Rich People Are Generally Evil
Extremely wealthy people discard their own spouses and children as easily as they discard thousands of factory workers. They feel absolutely no guilt as they scheme and connive, and they will rip off other rich people in massive Ponzi schemes with as little feeling as they’ll rape their housekeepers. The rich strap their supposedly beloved [...]
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