Congress’ top-ranked asshole, Rep. Steve King of Iowa, has offered his rationale for casting the lone vote against a resolution to duct-tape an Etch-a-Sketch plaque to the assistant janitor’s closet wall in the $600 million+ subterranean Capitol Visitors Center, to thank the slaves for building the U.S. Capitol as part of their slave work. MORE »

Our hardworking House of Representatives took a break from bickering about health care and carbon dioxide to pass a quick “most uncontroversial resolution ever” yesterday, one authorizing the new $600 million+ (taxpayer funded!) Capitol Visitors Center — basically a museum about the history of the Capitol building — to hammer a dinky plaque to the wall thanking the Slaves for, you know, “building the Capitol.” It passed by a vote of 399-1, so as a byproduct we now have mathematically infallible litmus test results that determine, officially, who is the biggest asshole in Congress. MORE »

What is our magical Congress up to these days? Yesterday, they had just voted on House Resolution 1113, “Celebrating the role of mothers in the United States and supporting the goals and ideals of Mother’s Day.” That’s a very nice thing to do, celebrating the strategic “goals and ideals” of Hallmark this way. Then, however, some Republican asked to reconsider the vote, and 178 Republicans voted against it — including the bill’s sponsor. Was this just some procedural move, to delay the Democratic leadership’s agenda? The “cynics” might say that. In truth, House Republicans just hate your mothers for producing you. [Washington Post]

It’s Internet Safety Month and no one even called us?

Last month, it seems, Lisa Murkowski and some of her most pious friends in the Senate proposed a resolution declaring June “The Internet Is Raping Our Children Month,” and it passed without note, attracting the attention of no one but the developers of filtering software.

The text of the bill, sort of, is after the jump.

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