Tag: resigns

What good is influence if you can't peddle it?

Oregon Gov. Kitzhaber, Vowing To Never Give Up, Never Surrender, Resigns

Well, this is completely unanticipated! Oregon Gov. John Kitzhaber has resigned, just days after announcing that no way in the world was he going to resign, which of course was obvious code for "Yeah, call U-Haul and reserve a truck...
Oh this guy, what a joker

Mitch McConnell’s Campaign Manager Quits To Spend More Time With His (Alleged) Bribe Money

Looks like Senate Minority Leader and Supreme Chelonian Overlord Mitch McConnell is going to have to find himself a new campaign manager after the sudden resignation of Jesse Benton, who will now have more time to hold his nose...

Martin Bashir Resigns From MSNBC Just For Saying He Wanted To Make Turds In Sarah Palin’s Mouth

Robert Frost - Nothing Gold Can Stay - The... by poetictouch Remember when Martin Bashir said he wanted to make poops in Sarah Palin's mouth? No, he wasn't trying to be funny. He was very, very MAD! Why did Martin...

Pope Pulls A Palin

Almost exactly 600 years after the last pope to resign resigned, Pope Benedict XVI is hanging up his Prada shoes and dancing off into ... well, we don't even know! Where do ex-popes go? Probably Boca. News organizations are...

North Carolina Gov Attempts To Appoint Fox To Guard Education Henhouse

In the fastest nevermind ever, North Carolina's new director of NC Pre-K quit the day after she was appointed, just because everybody figured out she hates public education. Whew, that was close! But, yes, North Carolina tried their best...

Barely Legal Furry Sexytime Topples Weirdo Rep. David Wu After All

Well, that was fast! Furry sex aficionado Rep. David Wu announced he will resign after the debt crisis negotiations are over (hahaha, so actually he means "never") because of this sexytime incident with the 18-year-old daughter of his high...