Rod Blagojevich, the fifth Beatle, was arrested just three days ago for being a comical idiot who got caught on tape swearing his face off while plotting to sell Barack Obama’s vacated Illinois Senate seat. But he’s not letting anything like an arrest and national humiliation get him down, oh no! He is upbeat and positive about, uh, ignoring all the polls that say he should resign, because a terribly disgraced and effectively powerless governor has many important things to attend to — things he cannot possibly hope to affect in the slightest! MORE »

Ilkka Kanerva, the 60-year-old Finnish politician who won Wonkette’s heart with his erotic telephone love-notes to a orange-fleshed troll, has been forced to resign his post. The resignation comes after a gossip magazine, Hymy, published two dozen of the messages this weekend, including one that read: “Do you want to do it in some exciting place?” MORE »

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Above, the precise number of retired generals required to call for your resignation before David Ignatius will take a position on you. MORE »