• One hundred years from now, school children will marvel at how obtuse Americans in 2009 really were. “How could they not have known Barack Obama was a Reptilian Shapeshifter?” the children will ask. And then their civics teacher Mr. Floyd will chuckle and reply, “They were very stupid. Very very stupid.” [True/Slant: Harmon Leon]
• Meanwhile, Michelle Obama goes on Sesame Street. But does she compose an awesome song about geometry, just like Philip Glass did? [The Caucus]
• Glenn Beck is the loneliest man on the earth. [Think Progress]
• Is it at all surprising that Creigh Deeds loves taxes more than he loves his children, but also hates Democracy with all his heart? No. No, it is not. [RedState]
• There is serious money to be made disrespecting Republicans. Just ask Alan Grayson, who is now officially rich. [TPM]

Your 24-hour Cindy McCain news network brings you this Hot Tip regarding the whereabouts and identity of the mysterious “Wonkett”: It could be any number of sick and depraved individuals scattered across the country. Part-time police composite artist Lauri Apple has graciously offered to render a few of the more likely suspects. Click the little picture to ENLARGE. MORE »

So it turns out that some top-level Edwards staffers (JOE TRIPPI???) were prepared to go public with news about their boss’s affair if it looked like he was in danger of actually winning the Democratic nomination. Thus: nobody ever had to worry about him ruining the party, because his own double-crossing employees would have ratted him out first. MORE »