Tag: reproductive rights

This is Kentucky state Rep. Mary Lou Marzian. She is your new legislative pal.

Kentucky Rep Will Only Let Dudes Have Boner Pills If Their Wives Say It’s OK

Oh great, some liberal Democrat Kentucky lady is trying to be FUNNY now, and she's doing jokes about something that should NEVER be joked about, namely the God-given right of every red-blooded American man to have all his patriotic...

Missouri Lawmaker Says Muslims Want To Abort Him, For Hating Planned Parenthood

Laughing at ridiculous state legislators, for their ridiculous ideas, is all fun and games, until someone threatens to kill them dead. And then it's like, "Hey, don't do that. That's rude!" Missouri state Sen. Kurt Schaefer is trying to stop a...
Academic Freedom's just another word for nothin' left to lose. Fine, it's two.

Missouri Lawmaker Don’t Want No Smart Kids Studyin’ Up On Abortion, No Siree

You at least have to give Missouri state Sen. Kurt Schaefer (R-Did We Even Need To Say?) credit for thoroughness and creativity in his efforts to clamp down on all those women who insist on having abortions even though...

Why 10-Year-Olds Should Not Be Pregnant: A Wonksplainer

This weekend, Mike Huckabee, a man who would like to be president of the United States of America, explained why it is perfectly perfect that a 10- to 11-year-old girl should be forced to bear her stepfather's child. Oh...

Shut Up Paul Anka, Ben Shapiro’s Dad Has Written Greatest Pro-Life Anthem OF ALL TIME!

Move over, Paul Anka. There is a new pro-life anthem in town, and not a minute too soon because "You're Having My Baby" came out over 40 years ago! Let's remind ourselves of the glory and perfection that was...
Word.

Notre Dame Stands In Schoolhouse Door To Block Slut Pills Today. Tomorrow. FOR EVER!

Ladies, would you like to guess who's screwing around with your reproductive health coverage this week? Haha, that was a trick question -- the answer is always "everyone," but we were specifically referring to the Supreme Court! Yesterday it...
Something seems a little off here...

France To Abort Everyone For Free Now, Pretty Much

France is enacting a new abortion law that seems aimed at reinforcing every possible rightwing American stereotype of that country, except perhaps for surrendering in a war: It amends the country's current law, which allows abortion only if a pregnant...

The Taming Of The Slut: A One Act Play Inspired By Today’s SCOTUS Hobby Lobby Decision

The curtain opens on a  generic office setting. THE BOSS sits behind a desk, feet up, hands folded behind head. His employee, LADY WORKER, enters, looking nervous.  LADY WORKER: You wanted to see me? THE BOSS: Yes, yes. Do sit down,...

Marco Rubio A Climatologist And An Obstetrician Now, Will Tell You When Babby Is Formed

Human-shaped fecal matter Marco Rubio has been taking some heat the last couple of days over his weekend comments regarding climate change and how it’ll take a lot more than 99% of climate scientists saying it is happening to...

A Very Angry Guest Post About Annette Funicello

A guest post from your comrade "Lou Cabron." And speaking of sluts, three weeks ago pastor Steven Anderson strolled into his Arizona church with proof that "the birth control movement" was promoting whoredom. So the pastor waves around his flimsy...

Virginia State Senator Should Leave Irony To The Professionals, ‘Parasites’ Out Of The Wombs Of ‘Hosts’

Virginia state Senator Steve Martin (R-Three Amigos) referred to pregnant women as "host(s)" on his Facebook page and even included a parenthetical aside clarifying that he's talking about mothers. He's changed "host" to "bearer of the child," because "host" suggests...

Jesus Watches ‘NCIS’ With Sarah Silverman; Wingnuts, Surprisingly, Furious

Sarah Silverman sure makes funny videos. There was that time she was fucking Matt Damon (MATT DAMON). And that time she hung out with all the Jewish nana's to make sure they went and voted for that menschy college...

How Will We End The War On The War On Women This Year?

This post is brought to you by our friends at EMILY’s List. 2013 was quite the year for the GOP and their never-ending fight to restrict reproductive rights. We saw House Republicans introduce their annual bill to strip funding from Planned...

Bristol Palin Wants To Singlehandedly Murder Planned Parenthood, With Her Vagina

Noted debutante Bristol Palin, who became an unwilling postergirl for chastity and purity and second virginities and whatnot (second virginities are when you only give up the butt), has done posted a "thought" on the MyFace and her dumb...

‘Pro-Lifers’ Save Women From Specter Of Open Health Clinics

Well, here is some good news to get your week started. If you are the sort of person who thinks the problem with America is too many women's health clinics, that is, and you'd much rather women have to...

Ross Douthat Is Sure You Sinners Can Just Go To Europe Or A Blue State For Your Abortions

As you've watched the Texas Handmaids' Tale- style abortion restrictions go into effect, we bet you've been wishin' and hopin' and prayin' that Ross Douthat, the baby-faced sad-90s-beard-rocking culture scold would share his derp thoughts with you on the...