Tag Archives: reince priebus

  Give them another five years

Every Single GOP Candidate Has A Cunning Plan To Murder Obamacare On Day One

It's like health care only different
The highest court of unelected activist judges in the whole Us of America declared, for the second time, that Obamacare haters need to hush now and take a nap because that shit is kosher, yo. Which does not mean the Republican Party or any of its “presidential” “candidates” are going to do that. The Affordable Care Act may be the super-duper twice-certified constitutional law of the land, but that doesn’t mean it shouldn’t be repealed and replaced with something even MORE better, dunno what yet, that’s not what matters right now! Read more on Every Single GOP Candidate Has A Cunning Plan To Murder Obamacare On Day One…
  Your Morning Maddow

Morning Maddow: RNC and Hategroup AFA Might Not Heart Israel After All

He'd be easier to find if he wore a striped sweater
Rachel Maddow closed Wednesday’s show with an update to the story that got rightwing religious wacakloon Bryan Fischer fired (or at least demoted) from his job as spokesman for the American Family Association. You see, the AFA was paying for some 60 members of the Republican National Committee, including its chairman, Reince Priebus, to take a free trip to Israel, because fundagelicals just love Israel so much, what with it being an essential component of the End Times. Read more on Morning Maddow: RNC and Hategroup AFA Might Not Heart Israel After All…
  Only Half As Stupid As He Sounds

Ben Carson Says ISIS Pretty Much Like American Founders, Except Maybe For The Wigs

You know who ELSE called some terrorists the moral equivalent of the founding fathers?
Speaking at the Republican National Committee’s winter meeting Thursday, Ben “I Am TOO A Serious Contender” Carson did one of those “Ben Carson says something crazy” things that we know and love so well, comparing the terrorists of ISIS to America’s Founding Fathers. But don’t you go thinking he’s nuts or anything, because he is not. Read more on Ben Carson Says ISIS Pretty Much Like American Founders, Except Maybe For The Wigs…
  One nation under white Jesus

Michigan RNC Guy Posting Stormfront Stuff On His Facebook Basically, Why Not

Party like it's 1859
Did you spend even one moment of New Year’s Eve wondering if old friend and RNC Committeeman Dave Agema was enjoying himself? Because while you were getting dressed in anticipation of being asphyxiated by glitter and vomiting champagne cocktails out of a taxi window, Agema enlightened himself with a ball-drop of opinions on why black people crime. Read more on Michigan RNC Guy Posting Stormfront Stuff On His Facebook Basically, Why Not…
  Chicks -- what a new idea!

GOP Finally Reveals New Idea: Look! Ladies! Look At All These Ladies!

they have all the kinds
Ever since the GOP announced its latest new rebranding plan — Ideas! We’re Going To Have Some! — we have been on the edge of our seat waiting to find out what their Ideas! will be. And thanks to this new failtastically funny ad, now we know. It is chicks, man. But in the good way. Read more on GOP Finally Reveals New Idea: Look! Ladies! Look At All These Ladies!…
  What do you think this is -- America?

Oh Great, Now Everyone In America Wants To Get Gay-Married

America
This is exactly what the protectors of traditional American marriage warned us about. (Not traditional Biblical marriage, where old-timey dads in olden times sold their daughters to their rapists, because come on, that’s ridiculous.) You let one lady have some “rights” just because the Constitution says she should have them, and before you know it, all these other Americans start demanding rights too, and the Supreme Court is all, “Sure, why not, leave us alone,” and then all of a sudden, EVERYBODY wants the same rights: Read more on Oh Great, Now Everyone In America Wants To Get Gay-Married…
  Very Serious Journamalism Meets Very Serious Talking Points

GOP Will Give Pregnant Ladies ‘Whatever It Is That We Can Offer’ Except For One Little Thing

Just trying to remember which talking point works here
In the never-ending quest to prove that every member of the Republican Party is dumber than he (or she, there are like half a dozen chicks too!) looks, Republican National Committee Chairman Reince Priebus went on Meet The Press Sunday to really drive the message home again some more again some more. Read more on GOP Will Give Pregnant Ladies ‘Whatever It Is That We Can Offer’ Except For One Little Thing…
  They're also FOR being against everything

Republicans Rebranding Again (Again), This Time As Party Of ‘Ideas’ LOL

They sure love us
Since it has been almost five whole minutes since the Republican Party tried again to rebrand itself again unsuccessfully again (turns out stock photos can’t vote; who knew?), there’s a new new super extra new plan to convince voters the Republican Party does not suck. We’re hoping it doesn’t fail until we at least finish writing about it. Read more on Republicans Rebranding Again (Again), This Time As Party Of ‘Ideas’ LOL…
  the tyranny of choice

Why Wait For The Primaries? GOP 2016 Poll Lets You Pick Terrible Candidates Now

Reince Priebus tweeted out an invitation today to go “Pick who you want to be the next president,” via the RNC’s excellent new survey toy. And what a broad selection of fine candidates there is, even though no one’s announced yet, even at this late date. The choices include people who will almost definitely run (Rand Paul, Ted Cruz, Marco Rubio), some last hurrah losers of previous campaigns (Newt Gingrich, Rick Santorum), as well as some solid “Who’s that again?” names for the veepstakes (Mike Pence, Brian Sandoval). And then there’s a few people we’d love to see in the race solely because they’d be excellent sources of blog posts (John Bolton, Sarah Palin, Allen West). But where’s Elder Statesman Mitt Romney? Read more on Why Wait For The Primaries? GOP 2016 Poll Lets You Pick Terrible Candidates Now…
  clipbait

Stephen Colbert’s Many Weird Tricks For Defeating Hillary Clinton (Video)

Here’s Stephen Colbert with a few suggestions for how the GOP can defeat Hillary Clinton, just in case the whole “brain damage” thing doesn’t work out. Gotta get tough — after all, this isn’t the ’90s, when the Clintons got a free pass from the Republicans. For instance, maybe they could take a page the Mississippi Senate primary and float a story about Hillary abandoning “Hillary’s secret bedridden wife.” Now that it’s out there, let’s just see Hillary deny it. The other thing we love about this clip is that apparently it’s taken a couple of years for anyone to make this joke: “Just ask RNC chair and Harry Potter incantation, Reince Priebus…” Read more on Stephen Colbert’s Many Weird Tricks For Defeating Hillary Clinton (Video)…
  better to keep your mouth shut and be thought a fool part eleventy billion

A Children’s Treasury Of Conservatives Reacting To Cliven Bundy Stepping On His Own Dick

You know that guy out in the desert who made a whole bunch of crazy statements that upset the authorities and caused a confrontation with the man’s many supporters, and then later a whole bunch of those supporters turned around and publicly denied him while others clung to the belief that he was a prophet who spoke the truth about the issues of his times? Yeah, that guy. Today is a new day and yet the storm over him continues. Let’s racesplore. We had a gut-buster of a day in the Wonkette newsroom watching Cliven Bundy try to walk back his rather intemperate comments about African-Americans and whether they were better off as cotton-picking slaves, because it is 2014 and apparently there are some people for whom this issue is not yet settled. Some of Mr. Bundy’s biggest supporters continue to support him. Others have as of mid-afternoon Thursday remained quiet. Still others have backed away like a bunch of conservative squishes. Read more on A Children’s Treasury Of Conservatives Reacting To Cliven Bundy Stepping On His Own Dick…
  spoiler alert: the rich win everything

Supreme Court Decides Citizens United Part Two: The Dickening

You are probably not surprised to learn that yr Wonkette’s understanding of, and interest in, campaign finance laws is limited, because we are not that kind of Wonkblog. Perhaps Nate Silver’s 538 thingee will do some charts and Ezra Klein’s Home for Wayward Contrarian Bloggers will add some context and then we will care. But even we know when to get pissed off about campaign finance stuff, and today is that day. This morning, the Supreme Court handed down a decision in McCutcheon v. Federal Election Commission. Why do you care? Because this sucker is this year’s Citizens United, and you can practically hear your right to free and fair elections tick tick ticking away, America. Where Citizens gave us those cool-ass SuperPACs so that people like Sheldon Adelson can throw $10 million at one candidate but it is totally not at one candidate because SuperPACs are magic. But wait! That didn’t really work out very well and those meddling Democrats STILL won things and we STILL haven’t broken the election system enough to completely exclude the blahs and the poors. Cue McCutcheon, which was a fight over aggregate limits. No no no no no, don’t wander off. We’ll explain! We’ll lawsplain! We’ll make it sexxxxy! Read more on Supreme Court Decides Citizens United Part Two: The Dickening…
  rightwingers are never racist

MSNBC Goes To Free Speech Jail For Pointing Out Racist People Are Racist

Rightwingers are never racist. Rightwingers are never racist. Rightwingers are never racist. Rightwingers are never racist. Rightwingers are never racist. Rightwingers are never racist. Rightwingers are never racist. Rightwingers are never racist. Rightwingers are never racist. Rightwingers are never racist. Now that that’s out of the way, let’s go look at the comments UNDER AN ARTICLE about threatening to boycott MSNBC for calling rightwingers racist! Read more on MSNBC Goes To Free Speech Jail For Pointing Out Racist People Are Racist…
  the cheap medium is the cheap message

The RNC Pouring Literally Tens Of Dollars Into Alaska To Beat Democrat Mark Begich

Reince Priebus was lonely. So lonely. So on Tuesday he called up many of his reporter friends and demanded they listen to him about how the Republicans were going to launch the ad campaign to end all ad campaigns, the one that would destroy Obamacare forever and ever. And everyone paid attention to Reince, and lo, it was good. Man, Senator Mark Begich of Alaska, one of the Dems that big bad Reince has in his sights, must have been boot-quaking. Except then the whole world figured out that the big unrelenting assault of ads was exactly two tiny ads. In Alaska. On the radio. That cost $55 total. Read more on The RNC Pouring Literally Tens Of Dollars Into Alaska To Beat Democrat Mark Begich…
  welcome to post-racial america

Reince Priebus Celebrates Opposite Day By Blaming Obama For ‘Culture Of Hatred’

When we woke up this morning, we felt a disturbing vibe that left us with a dread akin to the thought of motorboating Chris Christie’s moobs. We soon realized that this was not the fault of the sweet, god-fearing, kindhearted and ultra-loving GOP, but rather because we were drowning in a sea of hatred, spawned by our Dark Overlord of Anti-Hope. At least, that’s what the Leader of Enlightment Itself, RNC head Reince Priebus, had to say, per Politico: Republican National Committee Chairman Reince Priebus ripped President Barack Obama for creating a “culture of hatred” in which Democrats are likening the GOP to the Ku Klux Klan. “It’s the culture that the president’s cultivated here. A culture of dishonesty, a culture of hatred,” Priebus said Monday on Fox News’s “Hannity.” Clearly the man with the unpronounceable name is correct, and Democrats are spreading a culture of hatred around the country and ginning up race-related fears with KKK references. Let’s sexplore this phenomenon.  Read more on Reince Priebus Celebrates Opposite Day By Blaming Obama For ‘Culture Of Hatred’…
  needz moar meryl streep

RNC To NBC: That Hillary Clinton Movie Is Not Threatening To Us At All, Please Cancel It

Reince Priebus is deeply disappointed! He’s also concerned and disturbed! Is it because the GOP’s best chance at winning the presidency in 2016 is Hillary’s plane crashing into Biden’s train, then upon hearing the news Andrew Cuomo, Deval Patrick, Martin O’Malley, and Elizabeth Warren all choke on their organic free range tofurken and quinoa tenderloin? No! Actually, yes probably, but it’s also because of what NBC wants to put on the teevee: A docu-dramatic miniseries about Hillary Clinton, because apparently that constitutes an “event,” according to NBC chairman Robert Greenblatt. Where were you when you heard about the Hillary Clinton miniseries? Try to remember, you’ll want to tell your grandkids about it someday, so they can know about history. Speaking of history, when will Reince Priebus get Michael Steele’d for being terrible at his job and writing mewling, self-parodying letters, and we can forget how to spell his damn name? Read more on RNC To NBC: That Hillary Clinton Movie Is Not Threatening To Us At All, Please Cancel It…