Rape
Elizabeth Smart Politely And In Nice Mormon Girl Way Tells Abstinence Crowd To Bite Her
Hey, you know what’s really stupid? Telling kids they can prevent pregnancy and disease by just not having sexytime until they spend tens of thousands of dollars on a wedding with dried-out chicken and tacky pink bridesmaid dresses because that’s what God wants. You know why it’s stupid? First, see Bristol Palin. (B) Kids will [...]
Wingnuts Furious: Joe Biden’s Got A Real Purty Mouth
Wingnuts are furious, because … well, we honestly have no idea actually. Joe Biden talked about the movie Deliverance, and how when he asks guys what they would have done if they had been tied to a tree and raped, they don’t say “I would go get the sheriff.” That is because they are embarrassed [...]
Meet This Nice GOP Pennsylvania Mayor Who Tried To Rape A Young Man At Gunpoint
Well, we tried to bring you the story of a Democratic mayor who false-imprisoned a dude to make him do sex at him, and then fired one of his THREE guns into a wall or a bunch of newspapers or something, The Paper-styley. We tried to do this, since we got our tip from some [...]
Hero Kansas Republicans Stand Up For Women’s God-Given Right To Bear Their Daddy’s Baby
Kansas Republicans are very Reasonable People. How reasonable are they? They stripped out of their superfly abortion bill language that would have barred women who work at abortion providers’ from volunteering at their children’s schools. Like so: [O]ne thing the bill will no longer do? The committee removed a provision that would have banned abortion [...]
Steven Crowder’s Attempt At An Ashley Judd Rape Joke Somehow Makes Daniel Tosh Seem Endearing
Oh sweet merciful christ the annual khaki-ed klavern that is CPAC has finally ended and thus we can start following less disgusting displays of retrograde political insanity, like sequester budget debates or public lynchings. Sadly, however, there is one more “story” to report from this pasty-fleshed convention from hell, and it involves everyone’s favorite bastard [...]
Noted Anti-Rape Activists At The NRA Surprisingly Cool With Domestic Abuse
Are you having a nice Monday? Well we are here to help you with that. Go find a bucket and read this New York Times front pager about gunz and protective orders and prepare for some rage-induced dry heaving. Things are about to get hardcore sad up in here. So for the past few weeks [...]
Honestly, You Guys, ‘Not Raping’ Is Actually Really Easy
Today is International Women’s Day, which means two things. First, we have to listen to people say stupid things like: “I’m not a sexist, but why isn’t there an International Men’s Day?” The correct answer to that question is International Men’s Day is in November and the more correct answer is (read in your best [...]
Phyllis Schlafly On Women In Combat: Men Who Rape Them Will Be Accused Of Rape!
Original Mens Rights Activist Phyllis Schlafly, that grand old thing, has some thoughts on women in combat. She is against it. She is against it for all your standard Phyllis Schlafly reasons, but adds in one extra, just to keep things spicy: Men will not be able to stop themselves from the temptation of raping [...]
Los Angeles Would Like To Get In On This Rape Cop Game Please
Looks like the NYPD rape cops better step up their game because they have some competition! Whereas the NYPD keeps its lady citizens safe by raping them at gunpoint and or alternatively, when they are too drunk to consent, LA rape cops do it the old fashioned way: by threatening to put them in jail.
Have You Heard The One About The Woman Who Wasn’t Raped ‘Cause She Isn’t Married?
We heard such a good joke last night, you guys! Some real Absurdist Andy Kaufman-style next-level shit! It goes like this: so this chick is sleeping, and when she wakes up her boyfriend is making sweet love to her, all kissy and lovey with his penis in her vagina. Then she sees that it’s not [...]
Judge Smacked Down Just For Talking Sense About Your ‘Technical’ Violent Rape
A council on judicial performance has gone and admonished this old Orange County, California, judge, just because he went and said that a woman’s rape — at the hands of an ex-boyfriend/concurrent stalker armed with a “heated screwdriver” and threatening to mutilate her face and vagina with it — was “technical,” and wasn’t “a real [...]
Things You Didn’t Know You Needed To Worry About: Getting Raped By Demons
You may have been under the impression that when Christianists think about rape, they mostly think about how women are either asking for it by not screaming quite loudly enough or dressing like the sluts that everyone knows they are, or lying about it so they can murder a babby, or maybe using it as [...]
GOP Candidate Richard Mourdock: Why Can’t Dames Understand That Rape-Babies Are God’s Precious Gift?
Hey, you know what’s tricky? Putting together a coherent philosophical system that reconciles belief in an omnipotent but also loving God with indisputable evidence that bad things happen to good people. And it can be frustrating when you’re running for Senate and someone at a debate tries to trip you up with a “gotcha” question [...]
Should You Give An Opinion On Rape?
Man, it is like you cannot even tenderly explain that “some girls, they rape so easy” without everyone making a FEDERAL CASE OUT OF IT. Paul Ryan is the latest fair-weather friend to drop an endorsement of poor misunderstood Wisconsin Rep. Roger Rivard, just for explaining his own father’s nuanced words of wisdom about how [...]
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