Tag: rallies

Hundreds of Patriots, Cleverly Disguised As Tourists, Rally For Impeachment At White House

At noon on Saturday, the Real Americans of the greater Washington, DC metropolitan area were set to celebrate National Impeach Obama Week by meeting at the White House to call for the immediate impeachment of Kenyan Usurper President Barry Soetoro. The Wonket Washington Bureau readied...

Clip And Save: Your Patriot Bingo Card!

  ATTENTION, LOVERS OF FREEDOM! We assume we'll be seeing all of you Real Americans Saturday at noon. What's that? You have plans to spend your Labor Day weekend eating warm potato salad by the lake, maybe burning some lawn clippings in defiance of local ordinances? To...

God Is Telling New Jew Glenn Beck To Hold Rally In Israel

Sure, we can make jokes about the world ending this Saturday, but there is suddenly ample evidence: God has chosen his most reputable media servant to go to Jerusalem and tell the Palestinians to stop existing. According to Glenn...

NOBAMAs Can’t Make Signs: Photos From NYC’s Teabagger Rally

Teabagger rallies are happening across the country today because Teabaggers thought April 15 is Tax Day this year; it's not. Probably worried about another embarrassingly low turnout, no event was held in D.C. Your editor, like a number of...

Liveblogging the Comedy Central Rally Thing From the National Mall

As the world knows, one of those stations on the teevee reserved some of the green areas of the National Mall on which to have a comedy concert thing, and this is happening right now. If you decided you...

Can the Media Shut Up About Comedy Central In Time To Cover the Election?

If you haven't heard, Comedy Central is going to have a comedy event this weekend on the National Mall, because some of their shows are primarily rooted in political humor. This has very much confused the media, because people...

Massive Crowd of 5 Birthers Had a Rally On the Mall This Weekend

What an inspiring speech! There's birther Phil Berg, leader of this rally, hacking up phlegm and relaying the laundry list of "proof" we all know now by heart that the president was not born in the United States. As...

Scientist Proves Teabagger Signs Aren’t Racist, Exposes Media Conspiracy

A graduate student from UCLA photographed 250 signs that she saw at the 9/12 FreedomWorks rally, and then did scientific experiments to determine whether these signs were racist or not. The grad student's analysis found "only about a quarter...

Nation’s Political Action Reduced To Crowd Figures, Animated GIFs

At one point in our nation's history, popular political action was supposed to mean something. For example, the entire Vietnam War was fought because the Vietcong stole John Kerry's windsurfing board, and all of America's youth gathered in the...

Dumb Libtards To Host Own Glenn Beck Rally This Weekend

The most important thing concerning liberals is no longer getting their party -- which actually controls the legislative and executive branches -- to pass liberal laws; it is to spend all their time criticizing teevee people who just want...

Here’s the Stupid 9/12 Video!

If you want to get a feel for what the 9/12 rallies in Washington, Sacramento, and St. Louis were like, just take your laptop to the nearest Old Country Buffet, flip it open next to the meat bar, and...

Sarah Palin Slights Glenn Beck By Mistaking Him For Sane Person

Oh look, Twitter, Sarah Palin is here to tell us that the media is being silly about her pal @beck's rally. What's that silly media? You say @beck is the Twitter handle not of Glenn Beck but of the...

See You At the Obama Birther Rally!

Hot on the pristine white velcro tennis-shoe'd heels of Glenn Beck's weekend Slob Picnic/miracle, the Birthers have announced that they too plan on rallying in our nation's beleaguered capital. Hooray! The "Obama Birth Certificate/Eligibility/ObamaCare" rally happens October 23 ("1023")...

Conservatives Think Glenn Beck’s White-People MLK March Is Dumb

Glenn Beck and an army of Teabaggers are going to march on Washington on the anniversary of the "I Have a Dream" speech this weekend for some reason or another. Basically somebody at Beck headquarters said, "Let's get some...

Gun Nuts Helping Glenn Beck With His Dumb Rally

Hey you guys, are you going to Glenn Beck’s “Restoring Honor” rally at the Lincoln Memorial on “8.28.10”? We should all carpool with Ted Nugent and Sarah Palin in their cars/snow machines and sing “Cat Scratch Fever” on...

Tim Pawlenty Gets Inside Bachmann-Palin Sandwich [UPDATE: Better Stream!]

Tim Pawlenty, the Minnesota governor who wants to be president but is incapable of making anyone care about him, ever, was so jealous of Sarah Palin and Michele Bachmann's CURRENT & ACTUALLY HAPPENING RIGHT NOW death rally that he...