Tag Archives: race

  The Browns Will Defeat The Rainbow!

Erick Erickson: Fertile Latinos Will Breed Permanent GOP Majority, Strong Like Bull

Just lie back and think of gerrymandering
Oh, sure, you liberals may be feeling pretty chuffed with how well 2015 has been going for you, what with your Obamacare surviving and your Supreme Court Victory for Sodom, and your beloved Barry Bamz just having a fine time being a highly mobile duck who isn’t the least bit lame, but the real joke is on YOU, according to Teabagging never-nude Erick Erickson. You see, he knows that conservatives have a secret weapon in their quiver, and that is the fact that the Latins will out-breed you birth-controlling liberals and you queerfolk what can’t make babbies at all. Welcome to extinction, you with all your abortions! Read more on Erick Erickson: Fertile Latinos Will Breed Permanent GOP Majority, Strong Like Bull…
  But What About The Purple People?

White People Upset At White People For Being Mean To Blacks, Guess It’s Serious Now

No, but the little booger has made some unbelievable gaffes
So you know how polls about race always seem to show that black people think racism is still a thing, while white people mostly perceive it as something from the Olden Times, like way back before “Good Times,” even? Here’s a bit of a surprise, maybe! A new Gallup Poll finds that, in the weird language of polling, “Americans’ satisfaction with the way blacks are treated has declined to a new low in Gallup’s 15-year trend, now at 49%. This is a sharp drop from two years ago, when 62% were satisfied.” That’s a pretty weird question to start with — “How satisfied are you with how blacks are treated in U.S. society?” — but the results do actually seem to indicate that even white people are sort of vaguely aware that things may not be all that great. Obviously, this is Obama’s fault, or an indication that politically-correct media and college teachers and videos of black people getting beaten up and shot by cops have distorted reality. (There Fox News, we wrote your lede for you). Read more on White People Upset At White People For Being Mean To Blacks, Guess It’s Serious Now…
  Whatever keeps Hannity's viewers good and racist

Texas Says Sandra Bland Was Potted Up On Weed, Because That’s What Makes You Die

Yeah, marijuana use is clearly the important part of this story.
We’re still not sure how Sandra Bland died. The dashcam video told us fuck all, although whatever happened off camera sure did sound violent! The state of Texas is saying that, based on preliminary autopsy results, she hanged herself in her jail cell, but the family doesn’t accept that narrative and wants an independent autopsy done. The state says jail workers failed to check on Bland once every hour, as per policy, and that Waller County was unable to prove that its employees had the correct training to identify and handle inmates who may be mentally ill or suicidal. Moreover, there are inconsistencies with mental health documents, allegedly filled out at the jail by Bland, with one saying she had suffered suicidal thoughts, and another saying the exact opposite. How strange! Read more on Texas Says Sandra Bland Was Potted Up On Weed, Because That’s What Makes You Die…
  no YOU are the real racist

Dumb Okie Hicks Greet ‘President’ Obama With Treason Flag, Love

President Obama arrived Wednesday for a state visit to the foreign hinterlands nation of Oklahoma, and the natives, they were restless! And racist! Now usually when a duly elected president (twice, fuckers, TWICE) visits, people of all political stripes drop their grievance shit for a moment and show a little respect to the office, but not Oklahoma wingnuts. Instead they decided to show up at Obama’s hotel and wave around their Confederate flags, probably because they’re so proud of their Heritage Not Hate: Read more on Dumb Okie Hicks Greet ‘President’ Obama With Treason Flag, Love…
  Pretty sure this isn't racial transcendence

Idiot Wingnut Chick: America’s Not Racist, Except For Obama

Let's talk about slavery, Heather.
Here America is, all fired up for yet another solemn Conversation On Race, when we don’t even need to be doing that in the first place, since racism is over. The Charleston shooting was an Isolated Incident, because while individual racists still exist, America as a nation does not have any lingering institutional racism, according to Fox News contributing wingnut Katie Pavlich, who begins a column for The Hill by setting a straw man gloriously ablaze, much like the recent spate of burning black churches across the South: Read more on Idiot Wingnut Chick: America’s Not Racist, Except For Obama…
  the commentczar's in town

Deleted Comments Of The Week: The Illiterate, The Perverse, And The Deranged

Just try to keep the Yaks happy
The deleted comments game is a weird business — sometimes you can predict what topics will draw a lot of crazy comments — guns, Islam, and the Duggars, especially — and then sometimes, there’s a huge news story that doesn’t quite bring out nearly as much derp as we expected. For instance, we were sure that we’d be devoting most of this week’s Dear ShitFerBrains to this week’s Supreme Court decisions: Thursday’s Obamacare ruling and Friday’s complete destruction of America via Ghey Marrying. But apparently those were so traumatic that the Usual Crowd was too busy buying canned foods for the bunker and commiserating on rightwing sites. No doubt after the shock wears off, they’ll begin venturing to Wonkette to tell us precisely which torments we’ll all face in Hell. Ah, but we did hear a fair bit about the Confederate flag, so at least there’s that. Read more on Deleted Comments Of The Week: The Illiterate, The Perverse, And The Deranged…
  the commentczar's in town

Deleted Comments: What Did You Do In The Race War, Daddy?

Hey, Sunbutt, it's the Solstice. Go do your job.
You will probably not be greatly surprised that a large number of our deletia this week came in response to stories about the horrific massacre in Charleston. One story, more than any others — about speculation on Fox News that this was a hate crime against Christians — really brought out the trolls, possibly because even though the story noted that the shooter had told a survivor that his goal was “to kill black people,” it was still early on enough that some people were still comfortably in denial. Or just idiots. Read more on Deleted Comments: What Did You Do In The Race War, Daddy?…
  Rachel Identity

Rachel Dolezal Quits NAACP, Will Continue Fight For Her People, Whoever They Are

Ready for her close-up
Rachel Dolezal, the head of the Spokane, Washington, chapter of the NAACP, has resigned her post after her parents said late last week that she is not so much a black woman as she is White Like They. The whole story has had a lot of people saying, “Huh! That’s weird!” and has resulted in both some fine thinky pieces about how exactly Dolezal got it wrong, as well as some premium stupid about why there’s no such thing as transgender people, because gender and race are exactly the same, and you can’t fake either. And now Rachel Dolezal is well on her way to becoming a footnote in a whole bunch of dissertations. Read more on Rachel Dolezal Quits NAACP, Will Continue Fight For Her People, Whoever They Are…
  Nice Time update!

Mississippi Grads’ Families Won’t Face Jail Time For Being Excessively Proud Of Kids

We don't either.
Remember that real dumb story we typed at you, about the high school graduation in Senatobia, Mississippi, where two of the graduates’ family members were ejected from graduation for the egregious crime of cheering with beaming pride when their kids’ names were called, even though they had been EXPLICITLY TOLD no clapping until the end? And then District Superintendent Jay Foster decided to make an example of these obvious criminals (who are black, why do you ask?), so he demanded and had served warrants for their arrests, for “disturbing the peace”? The nerve of those families, for getting so excited they forgot they weren’t supposed to say “You did it, baby!” to graduates who did, in point of fact, do it, baby. Read more on Mississippi Grads’ Families Won’t Face Jail Time For Being Excessively Proud Of Kids…
  Just Don't Make This A Racial Thing OK?

Michigan Cops Had Perfectly Good Reason For Beating Up Unarmed Black Guy, Probably

Funny, not one working microphone, either.
Surprising news from Michigan: On Jan. 28, police in the Detroit suburb of Inkster were caught on dashcam dragging an African American man from his car, putting him in a chokehold, then repeatedly beating and tasering him because, they say, he was resisting arrest. We were surprised to learn that there’s a Detroit suburb named “Inkster.” Read more on Michigan Cops Had Perfectly Good Reason For Beating Up Unarmed Black Guy, Probably…
  We Just Like Saying 'Quinnipiac'

NYPD Making Friends And Influencing People, Except The Opposite Of That

Not actual NYPD officers
New York cops may want to rethink whether they were making friends and influencing people when they turned their backs on Mayor Bill de Blasio at funerals of two murdered NYPD officers. A new Quinnipiac University poll of New York City voters found that on the whole, people disapproved of the act by a margin of 69-27 percent. Only one demographic category approved, and just barely: Republicans were cool with it, 51-47 percent. Even cop-friendly Staten Island residents disapproved, although by the narrowest margin of any borough, with 50 percent disapproving and 47 percent approving. Read more on NYPD Making Friends And Influencing People, Except The Opposite Of That…
  Pudd'nhead Swanson

Sundays With The Christianists: Mark Twain Was Really Unfair To Slavery In ‘Huckleberry Finn’

Leviticus warns about this
We’ll give Colorado radio preacher and homeschooling maven Kevin Swanson some credit: the guy has Big Ideas, and in his ebook Apostate: The Men Who Destroyed the Christian West, he’s not afraid to make bold claims. His goal, after all, is to prove that Western civilization has been in decline ever since Thomas Aquinas started letting pagan Aristotelian logic into his theology, and that virtually every aspect of what people think of as our culture is really an attack on the Bible, which is our real culture. So maybe it’s no surprise that when it comes to slavery, the central sin of American history,  Swanson explains that the worst thing about it was that America didn’t do slavery in the way the Bible intended. Read more on Sundays With The Christianists: Mark Twain Was Really Unfair To Slavery In ‘Huckleberry Finn’…
  Do They Even Know It's Kwanzaa?

Obamas Can’t Help Dragging Race Into Kwanzaa Statement

Barack and Obama Michelle Obama have released their Annual Perfunctory Message for Kwanzaa: A “celebration highlighting the rich African American heritage and culture”? Why not just release Michelle’s “Whitey” tape while you’re at it, Barry? Read more on Obamas Can’t Help Dragging Race Into Kwanzaa Statement…
  All The Derp What's Fit To Herp

Derp Roundup: Fans Of Killer Cops Can Breathe Just Fine, Why Do You Ask?

Back away, little pony. These are not nice people.
Time for another roundup of the dumbest of the worst of the unfathomably stupid! We scrape the mishegas off our browser tabs, puree it into a frothy mess, and serve it up to you with a warning to not overdo it on the brain bleach. Proceed with caution and gin. Read more on Derp Roundup: Fans Of Killer Cops Can Breathe Just Fine, Why Do You Ask?…
  All The Derp What's Fit To Herp

Derp Roundup: Biblical Computer Programming, Obama’s Race Czar, And Other Horrors

Sudo bring me a muffin.
It’s time for another Derp Roundup, the occasional feature where we pressure-wash all the crud off our open browser tabs and bring you some stories that didn’t quite merit their own posts, but were too stupid to ignore altogether. Please administer brain bleach with caution. Read more on Derp Roundup: Biblical Computer Programming, Obama’s Race Czar, And Other Horrors…