Tag Archives: quicklink=false

 

Scott McClellan Can’t Ruin George Bush Junior’s Day

The great George W. Bush delivered the commencement address at Colorado’s Air Force Academy today, the same day that his former hobbit slave was publicizing mean books about him. Here he is this morning “chest-bumping” a graduate, who has probably already died in Iraq. [AP Photo] Read more on Scott McClellan Can’t Ruin George Bush Junior’s Day…
 

Why Not Have Roger Clinton Run Too?

Don’t you just love when people openly admit that they are voting for Hillary because it’ll get Bill back in the White House? Like this Kentucky man with his pin? It’s almost as amazing as how some people still like Bill Clinton. [Getty Photo] Read more on Why Not Have Roger Clinton Run Too?…
 

Barack Obama Is President Of Sunglasses

Hey ladies and gay men, here is your “Tuesday Hot Picture” of Barack Obama! Now you can gab all morning in the comments about how much you want to fuck the Democratic nominee for president (Al Gore). [AP Photo] Read more on Barack Obama Is President Of Sunglasses…
 

Montana Governor Speaks At One-Person Commencement

There are two people, total, in Montana: the governor and some high school kid. The latter goes by Jeff Greenwood, and on Friday, he was the only student to graduate from Opheim High School. The governor of Montana, Brian Schweitzer, gave the commencement address to this one student. Creepy. [AP] Read more on Montana Governor Speaks At One-Person Commencement…
 

Obama Leads Hillary By So Freakin’ Much

Here’s your favorite Gallup daily tracking poll, which now shows Obama’s largest lead ever of 16 percentage points. Jesus, did a huge wave of black voters (his only constituency) register to vote in the last day or something? [Gallup] Read more on Obama Leads Hillary By So Freakin’ Much…
 

No One Abandons Hillary! Swat! Swat!

From the Politico: “Hillary Clinton’s former campaign manager and confidante, Patti Solis Doyle, and Senator Barack Obama’s top advisor have informally discussed the former Clintonite’s going to work for the Obama campaign in the general election.” No one disregardeth thy high madam whilst fighting in a campaigne! And to the Afrikan: shouldst thou hire the Spanish beauty, protecteth thine coffers. [Politico] Read more on No One Abandons Hillary! Swat! Swat!…
 

Democrats Launch ‘McCainpedia,’ It Be Dumb

Oh golly look at what those rascals at the liberal Democrat party are up to now. They have made a website called “McCainpedia,” a clever play off of “Encyclopedia,” and it is the first website to do this. This site is not funny, and Ageist, and that’s all there is to say about “McCainpedia.” [McCainpedia] Read more on Democrats Launch ‘McCainpedia,’ It Be Dumb…
 

Hillary Clinton Psycho Spotted In California

Jesus, have we forgotten about Hillary Clinton so quickly? Wonkette has not written about the unsuccessful Inevitable Candidate since… noon, on Thursday! We can’t just quit Hillary cold turkey, much as we’d like to, so here “she” is STILL RUNNING (wokka wokka) in liberal San Francisco’s Bay to Breakers race today, courtesy of Wonkette arugula-city operative “Bob.” And for the record, a Kenyan won the race. Read more on Hillary Clinton Psycho Spotted In California…
 

Mike Huckabee Makes Hilarious Joke About NRA Rednecks Shooting Barack Obama

newVideoPlayer("huckabees_joke.flv", 506, 423,"");Here he is, your favorite evangelical former Arkansas governor and failed GOP candidate Mike Huckabee, cracking up the NRA folks with the old “Hey the colored boy is a-scared of your rifles” line. Ha ha ha! [Daily Kos/Gawker] Read more on Mike Huckabee Makes Hilarious Joke About NRA Rednecks Shooting Barack Obama…
 

‘I’ll Take A Question From The Polar Bears’

Interior Secretary Dirk Kempthorne announced on Wednesday that the Polar Bear would be put on the Threatened Species list, because all the ice has melted and that’s where the Polar Bear lives, on a piece of ice. Also, these comical Polar Bears actually attended Kempthorne’s press conference in Washington. See, they really have no place to go now! [AP Photo] Read more on ‘I’ll Take A Question From The Polar Bears’…
 

Marc Dann Finally Resigns

Jesus, this clown. Our favorite sexually-harassing lover of women and Hawaiian pizza, Democratic Ohio Attorney General Marc Dann, resigned yesterday after the Democratic legislature introduced nine counts of impeachment. Quitter. [New York Times] Read more on Marc Dann Finally Resigns…
 

Next Hillary-Obama Debate Will Be Awesome

“Hobnobbing with crooks!” This debate will happen in Kentucky, at the cable access station behind the moonshine mill, moderated by John Edwards disguised as Charlie Gibson. Also, this is from the highly anticipated new “Brokeback Batman” movie, the end. [YouTube] Read more on Next Hillary-Obama Debate Will Be Awesome…
 

Bob Barr Has A Jeremiah Wright Problem

Libertarian presidential candidate Bob Barr, a white landowning male, looks exactly like Rev. Jeremiah Wright, Barack Obama’s black Muslim pastor. Why won’t Bob Barr denounce his unpatriotic phenotype? [Slate/Trailhead]
 

Barack Obama Will Haunt Your Dreams

Here is Barack Obama playing pool last night, before a Bitter Shadow crosses his face and turns him into some serial killer monster thing from Muslim Hell. He is a terribly evil man, and he is coming for you. [Getty Photo] Read more on Barack Obama Will Haunt Your Dreams…
 

Ha Ha, Hillary Is A Republican

Here is a map someone at Daily Kos made, and it’s not even terrifying. OK, it is obviously terrifying in several ways. It is color-coded by votes in each county — blue for Barry, red for Hillary, green for that white guy who was running like 90 years ago. Florida, appropriately, looks like a barfy member. [Daily Kos] Read more on Ha Ha, Hillary Is A Republican…
 

Buy Helen Thomas’ Crazy Art

Here’s a nice drawing by the White House “Dean of Correspondents,” Helen Thomas, that you can buy for three figures on eBay. Or you can, you know, do anything else. But all of the money will be donated to sick people with… neurofibromatosis! So just buy it, now. [eBay] Read more on Buy Helen Thomas’ Crazy Art…
 

Oregon Paper Is Unbelievably Gay For Obama

Here is a nice image of Barry Obama playing half-naked in a filthy industrial river with his pet unicorn, Mr. Pantsy, and shooting Bitter Roses out of his wide-angle crotch. Lucas Ketner’s terrifying painting accompanies a Barry endorsement from Oregon’s Willamette Week, which is actually edited by Mr. Pantsy. [Willamette Week via Slog] Read more on Oregon Paper Is Unbelievably Gay For Obama…
 

Michael Bloomberg’s A Sociopath

We forgot, do we like Michael Bloomberg or not? What’s the line on this guy, now that he’s not annoyingly running for president anymore? Although he’s no Bill O’Reilly, Bloomberg certainly has his pet peeves, the biggest of which is the world “maintain.” That word does not transcend race, at all. [YouTube via NY Observer] Read more on Michael Bloomberg’s A Sociopath…
 

Bob Allen’s Wife Takes Over Allen Political Dynasty

Beth Allen, the wife of homosexual former Florida state Rep. “Twenty Dollar” Bob Allen, will not be deterred from Achieving! She is running for Brevard County Elections Supervisor, because someone’s gotta make a damn living in that household. Surely that county will have voting problems in the upcoming presidential election, and it will be gay Bob Allen’s family that has to decide the president. Barack can’t lose! [Orlando Sentinel] Read more on Bob Allen’s Wife Takes Over Allen Political Dynasty…