The Obamas have a terrible relationship with the Queen of England, Elizabeth Windsor. This is known. When they visited the Queen a few months ago, Barack Obama gave Her Majesty a “Touch iPod” loaded with hardcore interracial pornography films and swine flu. Michelle Obama, meanwhile, grabbed the Queen’s boobs for at least 30 minutes. The whole affair was vulgar. And now look what’s up: Gordon Brown didn’t invite the Queen to a Normandy party in Nicolas Sarkozy’s country, and she is pissed. Why did Barack Obama insult the Queen like this? MORE »

WHY IS THE OBAMA ADMINISTRATION TAKING OUR TEA BAGS? “The lower classes and uneducated swarms seem to be the primary target for this ‘collection by coercion,’ in which the Senate and House of Representatives have dug in their heels and embarked on a crusade to take all the tea bags from our most humble citizens.” [AOL Political Machine]

THESE OBAMAS MUST RESPECT OUR QUEEN: “The president’s presumptuousness most certainly did not stop with the poison gift of the I-pod. Instead of holding tape recordings of quality music from Great Britain, rumor has it this device was filled with 30 gigabytes (or, a half hour’s worth) of sexual American music by the likes of Barry White or Boz Scaggs.” [AOL Political Machine]

No, and if you’re wondering why your Wonkette has been posting stupid pictures and contests all day it’s because most of the “news reports” have been about how Michelle Obama, an Uppity piece of awful trash, “touched” (/shared a mutual quarter-hug with) old Queen Elizabeth, the divine ruler of the British Commonwealth. We hate to GO THERE but it would be nice if news organizations stopped being so racist sometimes. The Queen was not in danger (MAYBE). [YouTube]

It looks like CNN’s Ed Henry — who only eight days ago wrote The Worst Article In American History — is lining up some devastating “audibles” for his next opportunity to troll Barack Obama. “Oklahoma!” — does… DOES THE QUEEN EVEN KNOW WHAT THAT IS? [Twitter]

Oh this is a necessary post. You all do want to see the Obamas meeting our colonial Queen at her Buckingham Palace, don’t you? Because they do just that. Check out the Queen, still hangin’ in there. She could stand on top of both Malia and Sasha Obama and still be shorter than either of their parents. CNN did a great job covering this event, too. Its daytime anchor shouts for a while, and then a drunk limey comes on to shout some more. [YouTube]

To save money on e-mail or something, CNN.com editors are now communicating within the stories they post: MORE »

The Queen of England is still here, trying to surreptitiously take back the US for the British Empire under cover of darkness in a backroom deal with Dick Cheney, the Church of Scientology, a number of Freemasons, and Hitler’s brain. MORE »