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Michael Bloomberg Tells Thinkers How To Make The World A Better Place

Monday, April 26: The New America Foundation is bothered that all the anger produced by the Great Recession hasn’t really led to any rational, sound conclusions about how to fix income inequality and other moderately important things. At their event tonight, it will be revealed how we can give jobs to everyone, fix Wall Street, and still consider Obama to be the greatest President ever. [New America Foundation] Read more on Michael Bloomberg Tells Thinkers How To Make The World A Better Place… Read more on Michael Bloomberg Tells Thinkers How To Make The World A Better Place…
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Thinkers Contemplate the Future of Conservatives, Unions, and Cell Phone Service

Tuesday, March 30: It shouldn’t come as a surprise to anyone that the Heritage Foundation has created a lecture series in honor of the terrible bigot Jesse Helms, and it really shouldn’t come as surprise to anyone that the inaugural lecture is all about how Obama is … ruining America. Read more on Thinkers Contemplate the Future of Conservatives, Unions, and Cell Phone Service… Read more on Thinkers Contemplate the Future of Conservatives, Unions, and Cell Phone Service…
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Now That Everyone Has Health Care, Thinkers Are Free To Talk About What Really Matters

Wednesday, March 24: What’s so wrong with treating interns like sweatshop workers? Their nimble, small fingers are made for hours of unpaid stapling and filing. The Economic Policy Institute is upset that only wealthy kids are given this glorious opportunity and are hosting event in order to make sure that all God’s children can have meaningless work on their resumes. [EPI] Read more on Now That Everyone Has Health Care, Thinkers Are Free To Talk About What Really Matters…
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Thinkers Go After Women, Minorities and Babies

Tuesday, March 16: Our President and savior Barack Obama may actually be an incarnation of the long dead and often celebrated Jesus of Christian mythology, but the Brookings Institution is nonetheless convinced that religion was left out of the 2008 election. They ask if God will make a comeback in the 2010 elections and, if so, how many Democrats he will strike down before they remember that religion and 9/11 are for conservative use only. [Brookings Institution] Read more on Thinkers Go After Women, Minorities and Babies…
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Thinkers Contemplate The Things They Love: John Yoo, Terrorism, And War

Wednesday, March 10: Yes, someone watched you as you walked to work today. In fact, someone watches you every day, everywhere you go, because this is America, where 9/11 happened, so we’ll never forget what you’re wearing, where you’re going and who you’re talking to. This, as the Cato Institute explains, is the mentality consuming everyone, even the dirty, America-hating libruls. [Cato Institute] Read more on Thinkers Contemplate The Things They Love: John Yoo, Terrorism, And War…
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Thinkers Reminisce About Torture, Fun Little Topic That It Is

Tuesday, March 2: Who loves war? Why the Heritage Foundation, that’s who! And according to them, declaring war can be simple and fun: If a country thinks evil things about the US, why, they’ve declared war, and we must immediately fight them to the death (and maybe somewhere in there figure out how to win, because that’s probably a good idea too). [Heritage Foundation] Read more on Thinkers Reminisce About Torture, Fun Little Topic That It Is…
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Man’s Multiple Needs Are Just Too Much For Thinkers

Tuesday, February 23: That Obama, he’s not trying to protect America from terrorism, why would he do that? Democrats don’t believe in safety, nor do they worship torture rock-star John Yoo, and this is very problematic. They want everyone to die a horrible death from a terrorist attack, because this is how Socialism works. Such is your weekly fear mongering event from the Heritage Foundation. [Heritage Foundation] Read more on Man’s Multiple Needs Are Just Too Much For Thinkers…
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Thinkers Play With The Gays And Marvel At The Wonders Of The Internet

Wednesday, February 17: Rebuilding Haiti is extremely important, which is why the country just needs a Super Bowl. It will hands-down fix everything. The Brookings Institution discusses options for how best to rebuild the country, options which really should include building a Superdome and starting a professional football league. [Brookings Institution] Read more on Thinkers Play With The Gays And Marvel At The Wonders Of The Internet…
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Thinkers Remind Us Why All That Matters Is How You Interpret Things

Tuesday, February 2: Last week we learned that corporations are more like people than actual people are, and on Tuesday the Cato Institute will tell us why the decision is a victory for those of us who secretly wish that we, too, had a fat-cat CEO and a stock listing. And on Thursday, February 4, Heritage weighs in and actually debates the legitimacy of the decision. (Who knows!) [Cato Institute, Heritage Foundation] Read more on Thinkers Remind Us Why All That Matters Is How You Interpret Things…
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Thinkers No Longer Think Too Highly Of Dear Old Pres

Tuesday, January 26: Recent activities in Yemen have not convinced the New America Foundation that Yemen is a legitimate terrorist threat — only that it is on the “brink” of becoming one. Sure, they may be in cahoots with Al Qaeda and may desire to nuke every American city with a population over 50,000, but who doesn’t these days? [New America Foundation] Read more on Thinkers No Longer Think Too Highly Of Dear Old Pres…
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Thinkers Urge Preemptive War While Liberating The Human Body

Tuesday, January 19: The Cato Institute wants to buy all your bone marrow. It’s a renewable resource, after all, and in America we care about such things, and the market should just regulate your cells anyway. The time to liberate bone marrow is now. [Cato Institute] Read more on Thinkers Urge Preemptive War While Liberating The Human Body…
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Thinkers Remind Us All Of Our Failures

Wednesday, January 13: Bush administration Torture Czar John Yoo, who spends his days perfecting his water-boarding skills, will explain why he had EVERY RIGHT to add torture and other fabulous features to the American government at an event Wednesday at AEI. [AEI] Read more on Thinkers Remind Us All Of Our Failures…
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Thinkers Ring In the New Year With No Original Thoughts

Tuesday, January 5: Being poor in 2010? Definitely worse than being poor in 2009, because now we have absolutely no money to fund safety-net programs that provide important things like food and shelter, at least according to the Urban Institute. Here’s to a prosperous/homeless 2010! [Urban Institute] Read more on Thinkers Ring In the New Year With No Original Thoughts… Read more on Thinkers Ring In the New Year With No Original Thoughts…
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Thinkers Employ John McCain To Explain Why War Is Great

Monday, December 14: Obama now has his very own Doctrine! Hooray! And it’s here just in time for Christmas! But that’s not good enough for the New America Foundation. They want to know where it came from, if it will succeed, and if it makes any sense at all. [New America Foundation] Read more on Thinkers Employ John McCain To Explain Why War Is Great…
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Thinkers Declare All Good Things To Be Unconstitutional

Monday, December 7: A never before seen event: a Democrat will say mean things about Republicans, today, in real life. House Majority Leader Steny Hoyer will explain why he thinks Conservatives are to blame for every single problem in America. [Center for American Progress Action Fund] Read more on Thinkers Declare All Good Things To Be Unconstitutional…