Tag Archives: pt summon your blimps

  summon your blimps

Ron Paul Is President of CPAC

The Wonkette team made it through two of CPAC’s three days before a combination of disgust and alcohol poisoning finally sent us running, so we’re a little late tonight with the thrilling news (?) that Doctor Ron Paul won the wingnut straw poll! Ron Paul is going to be president again! So awesome. He won last year, too. This means Ron Paul is now a two-term president and will have to “stand down for socialism” in 2012. Who said winning was easy? Also, he got less than a third of the vote, which proves nothing more than 1) Ron Paul always gets his loyalists to vote in the straw poll, and B) The Republican “conservatives” are just a confused & jumbled mess today. They really don’t know what to do. Romney is still Mormon and Liberal, Sarah Palin is still some halfwit teevee grifter with a never-ending series of tawdry scandals, Donald Trump is a dumb muppet clown, etc. (Why is Donald Trump even mentioned? Oh right, because he decided to show up. Doesn’t take much to create “star power” at CPAC.) Read more on Ron Paul Is President of CPAC…