pt old coots

OLD COOTS  11:44 pm November 10, 2008

Ted Stevens Signs Ironic Hat, Appears Foolish

by Jim Newell

A ballsy Wonkette hero operative sends us a fantastic photo with this description: “I got convicted Senator Ted Stevens to sign this ‘I am VECO’ hat with a silver sharpie on election night 2008.” No, it’s not just funny because she fooled Stevens into believing that she was a supporter. Veco, for you hippie anti-corporates, [...]

OLD COOTS  2:18 pm July 14, 2008

John McLaughlin Shouts About Some Fancy Biracial Snack Food

by Jim Newell

Apparently someone on Earth still watches The McLaughlin Group and thank god for that, because old coot host John McLaughlin tends to say some pretty funny things about this Barack Obama character. A couple of months ago he interrupted Eleanor Clift’s Obama analysis and shouted “WARREN HARDING WAS A NEGRO,” which is true. While McLaughlin’s [...]

OLD COOTS  5:03 pm July 7, 2008

Violent Old FEMA Coot Wants To Be Famous!

by Jim Newell

Readers may remember the sad tale of Vincent Koley, the 74-year-old FEMA contractor who, while on a relief dispatch to flooded Iowa, hit some guy with his car and then beat him up with a golf club, all the while claiming that he could do as he pleased because he was “with FEMA.” Koley has [...]

OLD COOTS  4:11 pm June 27, 2008

Old FEMA Coot Beats Up Guy With Golf Club, In Iowa

by Jim Newell

So Iowa is underwater forever, and to the nation’s shock, FEMA has sent out emergency response teams — to help! This is only the second time in world history that FEMA has helped anyone, the other being the time they released that “How To Deal With Satellites That Crash Into Your Skull” manual. Perhaps they [...]


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