August is rapidly deteriorating into September, which means soon there will be no more summer interns to brighten your day, with intern sunshine. Heavens, we’ll miss their shenanigans — who will be here to jam the ATM machines, with red intern badges? Yes, we’ll always cherish the laughs. The tears. The memories that will require massive therapy … Oh heck, one more can’t hurt! [Spotted: DC Summer Interns] MORE »

So maybe (probably?) this is a fake, but then again that’s what we thought about the whole “hackers broke into Sarah Palin’s email” rumor. “She couldn’t possibly be that stupid,” we said, and then HA! And actually a 425 verbal sounds about right. [BuzzFeed]

Barry Hussein wants this terrifying furry to teach your 6-year-old about “bad touching.” [Swampland]

George W. Bush isn’t the only failed businessman in the family. His semi-retarded little brother Neil, also a known cokehead, has been involved in so many dirty deals and financial collapses that he’s rarely allowed around the Clan in public.

But behind the scenes, Neil Bush is still doing what Bushes do best: using family connections to shovel taxpayer money into his own pockets.

We’ll tell you why the new Business Week story on Brother Neil is headlined “No Bush Left Behind,” after the jump.

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Delayed due to technical difficulties/epic hangover

• Terror detainee bill passes House, will “authorize the indefinite detention of non-citizens without access to courts - even if they are not charged with any crime.” [WP, NYT, LAT]

• Democrats could win 6 seats and take control of Senate, “if the stars continue to align.” [NYT]
• Jeb Bush talks smack about George Bush’s No Child Left Behind program, “not saying it’s bad, but needs to be better.” [NYT]
• Bush “chaperoned” dinner for passive-aggressive Presidents Pervez Musharraf and Hamid Karzai last night. [BBC, NYT, CNN]
• Kazakh president to be feted at White House state dinner Friday while accusations of rampant corruption, murder, and Borat obstructionism continue to hound him. [NYT, NYT]
• Full NIE dealing with Iraq will not be released. [CNN, W$J]
• Chelsea Clinton to host her dad’s 60th birthday party/fundraiser in New York. Guest list and activities humiliate the CakeLove cupcakes and six-pack you got. [WP]

• Jack Abramoff pleads guilty as part of plea deal; inquiry reaches 60 lawmakers. Justice Department official: “The corruption scheme with Mr. Abramoff is very extensive. We’re going to follow this wherever it goes.” [WP, NYT, LAT, WSJ, USAT, WT]
• Secret eavesdropping by the NSA occurred before White House approval; data was shared with the FBI. [NYT, WP]
• Republican lawmakers seek cover from Abramoff scandal; officials are “waiting for the other shoe to drop.” [WP, NYT, WP, USAT]
• Republican strategy of “turning the K Street lobbying corridor into a cog of the GOP political machine” backfires. [LAT]
• Abramoff secretly collected over $20m; he has agreed to return $25m. [NYT, LAT]

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• Michael Scanlon, partner to Jack Abramoff, pleads guilty to conspiring to bribe a lawmaker and other officials as part of a plea deal with prosecutors. [WP, NYT, WSJ, LAT]
• Cheney at the AEI: “Any suggestion that prewar information was distorted, hyped, fabricated by the leader of the nation is utterly false.” William Kristol: “His numbers have dropped and he is probably not the best messenger to independents and swing voters, but in terms of managing an argument, he is good at it and his style lends itself to it.” [WP, NYT, LAT, WT, USAT]
• Cheney managed to celebrate “debate and criticism while declaring that a key element of that debate — whether the administration exaggerated prewar intelligence about Iraq — is off-limits.” [WP]
• Mongolia thrills Bush: “I’m here on an important international mission. Secretary Rumsfeld asked me to check on his horse.” [NYT, WSJ, , USAT]

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• White House is willing to open the Strategic Petroleum Reserve if needed in aftermath of Hurricane Katrina. [WSJ, WP]
• Bush, in attempt to change topic from Iraq, again calls for overhaul of Social Security and says “there is more we can do” about border security. Bush on Social Security: “I’m going to keep working this issue.”[NYT, WP, USAT]
• Roberts argued for a permanent ban of racial quotas in the workplace and against school busing designed to integrate students. [WP]
• Roberts advised the Reagan administration not to expand policing powers to government agencies such as the Interior and Agriculture Departments; called “a classic conservative articulation of the individual’s right to be protected from state power.” [NYT]
• Leahy gives heads-up to Roberts: expect questions about the “Bybee memo” that defines the legality of torture. [NYT, LAT]
• White House official says Republicans have lost their advantage on education; No Child Left Behind is increasingly unpopular among both parties. [WSJ, LAT]

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