Someone sends RedState a photo of this unfunded, dinky thing, in Texas, and Erick Erickson writes, “We need that spirit in this country. We need the Spirit of Skidmore.” As tipster “Michael E.” writes, “An example of some garbage museum that the conservatives think should be the gold standard. ‘Welcome to the Smithsonian Institution, now without federal of state funding, open Sunday 3-5PM!!’” Indeed. It’s easy to maintain a museum when all it features is a bunch of old, rusty mechanical shit laying around the parking lot. [RedState]

It’s too hot to be outside, SO INSIDE you shall go. And where to? Turns out that DC is quite the cultural destination with over 10,000 museums (give or take a few) and you should go to all of them, and you have time to because August is hot and boring.  What’s more, super expensive museums, like the Newseum, are offering discounted tickets in August leaving you NO excuse not to go inside and get cultured. MORE »

Fearing the tourist mobs on the Mall but needing a national monument fix? Head to the mysterious land of Petworth, home to Abraham Lincoln’s famous Washington cottage! MORE »

“Real Machers: Portraits of American Jewish Gangsters,” an exhibit of pen-and-ink drawings by graphic artist Pat Hamou, is opening tomorrow at the Ann Loeb Bronfman Gallery. Hamou’s portraits of the “machers” (Yiddish for “big shot”) are hardly threatening in their fedoras and bow ties, but you can guarantee, as Hamou does, that they have “bigger matzoh balls than most.” Feb. 18-May 17. [DCJCC] MORE »

The Connor Contemporary showcases the works of John Kirchner and Brandon Morse in a joint exhibit, “Unknowns” and “This Shape We’re In,” an exploration of decay and rebirth. Kirchner takes old oil paintings from unknown artists and adds commonplace things to them — an apple, a shirt — while Morse’s videos show structures breaking down and forming new shapes. Until March 21. [Connor Contemporary] MORE »

In the English-speaking world, the greatest honor that a well-known human can earn is to be made into a waxen gargoyle by Madame Tussauds. Michelle Obama, our new First Lady, will enjoy this wonderful privilege in a few short months. MORE »

Exhibition Picks:
Roller derby girls are frightening: They wear torn fishnets, have tattoos and are into feminism. But Cory Oberndorfer makes them look as sweet as ice cream in his Flashpoint exhibition, “Flavor of the Month,” a collection of candy-colored graphic art prints. At Flashpoint, until Feb. 13. [Flashpoint] MORE »

Our Liz Glover dropped by the National Portrait Gallery to ask bitter voters about Stephen Colbert’s dignified triple portrait, which enjoyed a limited engagement hanging in the restroom foyer, over the water fountain. The answers may repulse you! (Thanks to Dawne Langford for the camera work.)

Most DC residents think of the International Spy Museum as either that place where my nieces and nephews go while I’m taking a break from their visit, or the expensive one. The museum, perhaps chastened by its you know — for kids! reputation, has launched a sexy, not-at-all-exploitive new ad campaign (shown above, shot yesterday at the Farragut North Metro station) to let everybody know that they’ve got hos, babes, and naughty secrets as well! And that hot thing in the ad? She’s totally a spy! I bet! Bitch set me up!

Do you like “edgy” art? Perhaps a fat naked guy in body paint? Well, do we have a gallery of Not Safe For Work pictures for you! MORE »

* “I am Mary Cheney’s fetus” [Craigslist]
* Blogging to peak in the first half of 2007. [circumlocutor]
* We need more troops like you for our War on Christmas: “…they start spilling out of places like Felix and Spy Lounge and Bourbon, stuffed full of mini quiche and well drinks, looking for “The next place to parr-tay, bra!” [Sour N Sweet]
* Metro Police more responsive than DC Police. See? They done something right. [Logan Circle News]
* The Hirshhorn is hiring a Director of Development. If you get the job, tell them to screen some movies or have some parties. Just tell them to stop being the boringest museum ever. [DC Arts Jobs]