pt major endorsements
Evangelist Endorses Obama Because George Bush Disrespected ‘Matthew,’ From The Bible
by Jim Newell
An evangelist named Dr. K.A. Paul, whom the New Republic has called the most popular evangelist in the world (read: has sodomized more little boys than the others), has shockingly endorsed the Muslin candidate, Barack Obama, in what must be an all-time first! This dude, who we will respectfully dub “The Other Dr. Paul” for [...]
Ron Paul’s very special press conference has ended and, we regret to inform, it featured no “Tournament of Losers”-style death match among the various third-party candidates he invited. He totally copped out and endorsed three third-party candidates: Ralph Nader, Cynthia McKinney, and Chuck Baldwin. He was planning on endorsing Bob Barr, too, but selfish Barr [...]
Bill Clinton Releases Important, Bland One-Sentence Endorsement Of Obama
by Jim Newell
Now that his wife isn’t running anymore, will Bill Clinton revert to being arguably the most popular Democratic official of the last half-century and, you know, help his party out a bit? Maybe hold a big public endorsement spectacle for Obama? Maybe later! He has finally indicated, however, that he will support the Democratic nominee [...]
