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Tag: pt lol

Wonkette Self-Care For Nov. 16: This Terrible Angelina Jolie Movie

Here is a thing you can watch that is not about politics. And it. is. THE. WORST!

Whom Did Hillary Clinton Threaten To Murder To Get Jerry Brown’s Endorsement?

The Washington Post explains Jerry Brown's 'lukewarm' endorsement of Hillary Clinton. Lucky mindreaders at the Washington Post!

OMG BEYONCÉ, STOP LITERALLY EATING THE BRAINS OF CHILDREN!

We have an important journalism update on the trollop Beyoncé, who insists on being a feminist black lady, and who we learned Monday is an "urban terrorist" and a CIA-funded brainwasher, on top of her normal duties as the president...
Borned stupid.

Everybody Hates Ted Cruz: George W. Bush Edition

It is a well-known fact that there is nobody in the world who REALLY loves Ted Cruz. All the people who say they do are just kinda faking it because they don't want to be mean, even though Ted...
Just put a Band-Aid on it, don't be so weak and unprofessional.

Donald Trump Pinky-Swears Undying Love To GOP, Wink Wink

Ooooh, the Republican Party finally outsmarted Donald Trump! After his repeated threats to run as a third-party candidate, should The Establishment fail to continue giving him the quality scrote-job he demands, Trump has caved to the pleas of the all-powerful almighty...

America Loves Ladyparts More Than Guns, Still Hates Republicans

Whee, girls and boy-girls, it's time for another dive into the mind of The American Voter. Don your brain condoms, and let's take a look at what U.S. Americans "think" about stuff and things: In case you missed it, that's...
Not presidential material. Not Bobby Jindal either.

Bobby Jindal Is The Wingnut Presidential Candidate Nobody’s Been Waiting For

BREAKING NEWS! Gov. Bobby Jindal, who has basically ruined Louisiana, declared his candidacy for president of US America Wednesday afternoon, far too close to the city of New Orleans for anyone who actually loves that city. He had started off...
What Allen West sees when he closes his eyes.

Allen West Got Sharia Law All Over Him In The Walmart Checkout Line

Look, disgraced torturer Allen West is scared of Muslims. They're everywhere! It used to be they were just in Iraq, and he could handle the situation by pretending to kill them and discharging bullets right next to their heads,...

U.S. State Department Hilariously Announces ‘World Press Freedom Day’

The United States, which is currently engaged in a complete war against some weird guy with a website, is going to host "World Press Freedom Day," the Department of State announced today. They're all especially excited about protecting the...