Evil hair-petting secessionist madman Rick Perry, Texas “Governor for Life,” is in some hot poop nowadays over what else, randomly executing everyone. But the scandal lay in the cover-up, of course: why won’t Rick Perry release official documents from the day of an execution in 2004, showing that the person he killed was probably innocent? And why is he firing the state official investigating the circumstances of this execution and requesting these documents? Probably because Rick Perry never read them, or read them and didn’t care. Don’t want to spoil a good killin’ for the public, after all. MORE »