What’s that old saying about the guys who hate the gays so much? Something like “the intensity of your closet homosexuality equals the intensity of your homophobia.” MORE »

Maybe Senator Elizabeth Dole teaches a community college English class on the side and wants to show her students a cartoonish, real-life example of “irony,” because that’s the only way to explain her current episode of retardation. She has introduced an amendment to the HIV/AIDS/etc. relief bill nearing completion in the Senate that would rename it after dead Senator Jesse Helms, the famous hero who once said, “There is not one single case of AIDS in this country that cannot be traced in origin to sodomy.” This Senate bill, interestingly enough, will probably contain another amendment — this one from John Kerry and Gordon Smith — to remove the HIV travel and immigration ban for foreigners hoping to enter the United States. This ban, of course, began in 1987 and is called the “Helms Amendment.” So basically, Boo Elizabeth Dole! Elizabeth Dole has gonorrhea! [HuffPo]

Many, many gay homosexuals are angry about North Carolina Governor Mike Easley saying Hillary Clinton made Rocky Balboa look like a pansy. How dare this historic friend of the gays sit idly by while her surrogate throws around these hateful smear words? And how many agujeros de la gloria will Chelsea have to service at The Endup to win back the affections of her mother’s old pals? MORE »

The past several years have taught us all a valuable lesson: the nuttiness of a Republican legislator’s homophobic rantings is directly proportional to the secret gay shame of that legislator, and inversely correlated to the amount of time before that person gets busted doing the thing they professed to find so repugnant. By this math, Oklahoma State Representative Sally Kern will be discovered by week’s end trolling for muff in the ladies’ room of the World Golf Hall of Fame. MORE »

Last week John Amaechi, a former NBA player, came out of the closet and began promoting a new book about being a closeted NBA player; several days of current NBA players saying, “Sure … I think it’d be OK … to have a gay teammate … as long as they don’t put that gayness on me” while looking profoundly uncomfortable ensued. But then former NBA point guard Tim Hardaway decided to just let rip: MORE »