This is what the Ark would have looked like, if Noah had been an out gay man. MORE »

WTF? Oh look it’s Choire Sicha & Ken Layne’s hit new teevee show, Gossip Girl, at THE AWL. MORE »

Gather ye rosebuds, everyone, it is time to play a game! It is the popular children’s schoolyard game of “Fuck, Marry, Kill.” Oh yes. We’ll be considering three different zeitgeist-y people each week and dissecting their merits by applying to their persons one of the given Verbs. Those are, just to re-cap, Fuck, Marry and Kill—if you need to write this down, please grab a pen and paper now because the pace of play is just going to increase from here. It is fairly self-explanatory but there are important rules that are absolutely crucial to establish right now, before anyone gets emotionally involved.
MORE »

Here’s something you don’t see too often, these days, during the Great Big Depression: the launch of a new publication! It’s called Wonkabout, and it’s your guide to all that is fun and interesting and weird and tasty and boozey in Washington D.C., the new capital of the world. Yes We Can! MORE »

Hey did you all realize that DC is so zeitgetist-y now? It’s true! The New York Times, your new DC alt-weekly, totally went to this one club and it was so cool. And now Obama is the new sixth borough. Celebrate your city all weekend long, by engaging its many many activities. And then Wednesday, celebrate alcohol by disturbing David Denby reading selections from his new book about being respectful to one another. MORE »

CONTEST OVER, THANKS FOR PLAYING! Now that we’re all poor and soon there will be no Internet or TeeVee, it’s time to learn to read again! How would you like to win Eleven (11) new political books from Hachette Book Group USA? You would like that a lot, we bet. MORE »

All your friends who’ve been in places like Denver and St. Paul for the last nineteen weeks will be back in town tomorrow, hurrah! They will want to drink, heavily. Here are some means to that end, and an elitist movie or two. MORE »

Not in Denver rocking the stadium with Barack Obama and Little Stevie Wonder? Well, lucky you! There’s fun stuff going on in D.C., too, and no ugly media people to muck it up. Enjoy sculpture, deejays, aliens and Dostoyevsky! MORE »

This thing about John McCain’s houses is too good. John McCain cannot remember how many houses he owns, because he doesn’t really own any, because his wife inherited most of them. You know, his wife, Cindy — the same Cindy whose father bought WALNUTS! a seat in Congress as a wedding gift. John McCain’s life has been so kooky! And that’s why his campaign released a comical statement today in response to Obama’s “Seven Houses” ad. It is, how shall we say, loaded? MORE »

Way back in January 2000, John McCain was winning New Hampshire, George W. Bush didn’t matter, and Hillary Clinton was in the White House. So much has changed. Thanks for being part of our fun-filled New Hampshire coverage. We have more reports and video and photos and detritus that we’ll be posting in the morning, but it’s pretty much a wrap for tonight — 86% of the precincts have managed to turn in ballots, and there’s really only 6,000 votes between Hill’s big victory and Barry’s tragic race-based loss. If you want a quick bullet-point link list, you are in luck because we are posting one right here: MORE »

Wonkette will kick off its firsthand, groundbreaking, on-the-scene coverage of the 2008 primary season this weekend in quaintest New Hampshire colony! Yours truly will team up with Liz “Videographer to the Stars” Glover to provide five days and four nights of investigative New Journalism. Coverage will start with frequent updates tomorrow afternoon, like 1 or 2 p.m. or maybe later, through the weekend and Monday and Tuesday (the day it happens!). MORE »

They’re immune to all laws, they can throw you in the gulag for any reason at all, and they can lock up all your money and property if you’re “impeding” whatever crazed satanic bullshit they’re doing now or in the future. So what can Congress or the Military or you, the hapless citizen, actually do to stop them? We’ve consulted top historians and constitutional scholars — the ones that came up on the first page of the Google search, anyway — and they’ve got some fun advice for America. MORE »

Beloved Jeopardy champion Ken Jennings is running for president! Well, not really “running,” but he does say if Wonkette’s DRAFT JENNINGS (NOT WAYLON, NOT PETER, ONLY KEN) campaign actually works, he will simultaneously refuse the nomination and serve just like Reagan, by taking naps all day long. MORE »