Dare we call this a ROLL-OUT? MMHMM. After only eight months, and with health care reform shockingly enough moving forward and almost (almost!) out of committee, a few random Republicans and ex-Republicans and pretend Republican movie stars have decided, “We like this thing, the Obama health care reform, and we don’t care who knows!” (Well, Bill Frist does kind of care who knows, which is why he’s walking his support back. Whoopsy Doctor Bill!) MORE »

America’s favorite orange-skinned reformed bachelor, Florida Governor Charlie Crist, is a pretty OK guy stuck with the unenviable task of governing a drooping land-phallus stuffed with meth fiends, unemployed real estate agents, and pythons. But now Crist has chosen to act like something of a dick to nice Sonia Sotomayor, for whom he would not vote if he were a senator due to her maybe being wishy-washy on the Second Amendment — which is Governor Crists’s favorite amendment of all. MORE »

It’s pretty exciting to vote, right? Remember how cool you felt in November, voting for the black dude? Remember how fun it was, voting against goddamned Sarah Palin and Walnuts? And just cold goin’ down the ballot and voting against anybody with an “R” after their name? Fun times. You can relive the excitement today in California, if you live there and do the voting thing — and if you read Wonkette, there’s a one-in-three chance you do live and vote in California. Who knew? MORE »

There is a special place in Hell for hairless rat-eyed creeps who rise to fame as an emblem of all that is mediocre and shameful about our dumb country and who make careers for themselves selling digital TV converters and then start yapping about how they never really supported the people who made them a household name in the first place. We speak, of course, of the odious Joe the Plumber, who will suffer an eternity of torment at the hands of lecherous demons with forked sex organs. MORE »

• ENDORSEMENTS: Your editor endorses John McCain, for president, of America. [AOL Political Machine]

Check out this sexy article which shows every fancy college newspaper endorsing Barack Obama except one, in a ratio coincidentally similar to that of the editorial staff at Slate, “the college newspaper of the Internet.” The only college newspaper to endorse McCain is that of the University of Mississippi, where they hate black people all the time, because of slavery. Not all of Mississippi is horribly racist like this, however, as the “grown-ups’” Clarion-Ledger of Jackson, Mississippi has endorsed Obama. For some PERSPECTIVE, the headline for this paper’s wrap-up of MLK Jr.’s “I Have a Dream” deal in 1963 was, “WASHINGTON IS CLEAN AGAIN WITH NEGRO TRASH REMOVED.” This newspaper has no consistency whatsoever. [Editor & Publisher, HuffPo]

We’ve had a wonderful year with our favorite columns-writer-of, Peggy Noonan — maybe because, in our hearts, we knew this day was coming, this declaration to end all declarations. And here, today, we have our reward, our moment of grace. As usual, as always, our Peggy doesn’t bother with tired old introductions and such — this is, after all, a woman who burst into Bloomingdale’s and demanded pen and paper, one day, when she chanced upon a Mexican. Instead, she drops the bomb we always expected, like this: “The case for Barack Obama, in broad strokes:” And then she makes her case, which contains the most delightfully cruel assessment of John McCain’s delusional character we’ve even encountered. MORE »

What a sore winner this guy is! The only three newspapers in the country to endorse John McCain — the New York Post, Washington Times, and Dallas Morning News — have all been given the heave-ho from Barack Obama’s pwecious pwane. Now they will all have to fly commercial in order to get to various events in the last stretch of the campaign. This is the journalistic equivalent of having to walk through the town square in a pom-pom hat and a thong. [Drudge Report]

MAGAZINE ABOUT WEALTH ENDORSES OBAMA: Sarah Palin’s favorite — dare we say, “favourite,” tut tut — magazine, rich & sexy British global-money pamphlet The Economist, has endorsed Barack Obama, who is more likely to save all of their money than John McCain, who’s just nuts. [The Economist]

The past week has been so insane and frantic — thanks, Ashley Todd! — that we never got around to mentioning the daily endorsements of “That One” by myriad Republican politicians and power-brokers. So let’s run down the list, and maybe even figure out what it all means, at this late stage in the game. MORE »

Suddenly Saturday Night Live is on all the time, because an election’s coming up. But ha ha ha SNL we still don’t watch you, even on Thursdays! Anyhow here is a nice video clip of some portion of that show, featuring your old pals Will Ferrell and Tina Fey, who are not on that show anymore but who came back to do some impersonations. And also Darrell Hammond. A ringing endorsement to watch, yessiree! [NBC]